Seem to have given up depression anxi... - Anxiety and Depre...

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Seem to have given up depression anxiety old age

basten profile image
16 Replies

Hello I'm 70 female and live on my own. My dog died 2 weeks ago so I know I'm grieving for her. But I don't have any friends and sometimes see my grown children weekends. They never phone me in the week. I go days without washing and dressing going out only to get food shopping. All I do is sit and watch TV or try and read. I am on a concoction of meds and now I am not sleeping well on them like I used to waking on and off all night and up at 4 30 or 5.00 am. I eat something then go back to bed and try to sleep again but cant but just like there all anxious and often call out my sons name but of course hes not here. I do have my two lovely cats still I see very little point to each day and put myself down a lot I e. Very wrinkkey, teeth fallen out , weight gain horrible from meds, whole house needs decorating new stuff but no money. Everything is getting to me. All I want to do is have a good nights sleep . I've suffered from horrendous panic and anxiety attacks over the last 3 months ending up in hospital. I am very lonely and have trouble mixing anyway. Is there anyone else struggling like me on meds and depression and old age loneliness

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basten profile image
basten
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16 Replies
mschloe profile image
mschloe

Hi Basten, I'm so sorry you're going through such a rough time, & as I am 66 & admitted myself for depression three years ago, I have learned how to manage loneliness which is worse on the weekend. Medicare should cover therapy & I highly recommend seeking out help. I had to force myself little by little to get out of the house to be around people & eventually made some very good friends. A good place to start is a senior citizen center where they have all kinds of classes & things you can do with people your own age; we all now have wrinkles & other issues. I was fortunate to find a job training program & have been working part time; it's only 15 hours a week right now, but it gives me a place to go three days a week plus an extra $400 a month. I also joined a group that meets for lunch & games on Wed & am now on the crew who puts it on; I have made most of my friends there. Since you obviously have access to computer, start making searches of senior services & centers near you & then make up your mind to check them out. If you don't drive, look into transport services and/or call the places & see if they can help with rides. There are also unlimited places in need of volunteers, & a nursing home and/or assisted living facility are places where you could visit others & help yourself at the same time. It takes determination to get out of the house, but the more you try, the better things will get. Good luck!

hypercat54 profile image
hypercat54 in reply to mschloe

Good advice but the poster is in the UK not USA x

basten profile image
basten in reply to hypercat54

Yes I realised that thankyou

basten profile image
basten in reply to mschloe

Hello thankyou for your reply and encouragement it is the anxiety that is hard to overcome and I don't sleep well . I live in the UK. I do go out once a week to a new group for 2 hrs and the people are non judgemental.and very nice. I used to go to church once a week and a lunch club too once a week but I suddenly stopped going. I lost drive and enthusiasm which is my fault. But even in a crowd I felt lonely. I'm so glad you changed your life around and it's a great achievement well done . Depression anxiety and panic attacks are not nice. Thankyou for replying. I must be stronger and more courageous

Kkimm profile image
Kkimm

Hi.

I really feel for you. You are welcome to message me anytime and I will answer as soon as I can.

You are very down at present but what sort of things used to interest you, perhaps we have some interests in common to chat about. I love books, films, travel, wildlife, gardening, etc.

I am retired and am 64 but lucky enough to be still active, it is so difficult when you are not. I had had anxiety a couple of years ago treated well by antidepressants and am nearly fully recovered now.

Very best wishes

Kim

basten profile image
basten in reply to Kkimm

Hello Kim I live in the UK. I don't if you do. I am on medication some of which the psychiatrist said I should not have been kept on and he blames my GP and therefore has kept me on them. I do have a garden and try to read historical novels. I am afraid I don't have any other hobbies as I'm not a knitting or arty person . Yes I am very down especially as the meds used to give me a good nights sleep and now they don't and one of them I will have to come off as I have put on a stone and a half in weight as they make me crave carbs and sweets something awful . What do you do in the day and to keep busy. You are still a youngster ha ha. I love watching historical films and documentaries . My son is going to take me to see Judy....a film all about Judy Garland who I loved to watch it is very nice of you to reply and offer support.

hypercat54 profile image
hypercat54

Yes me. I am a similar age to you and retired but don't have a partner or children. I have always suffered from depression but my physical health was always excellent until around 8 years ago when I got lung disease and 2 years ago when my back went. Now I struggle to get around.

I joined a local over 50's group so go to the games afternoon and sometimes the writers group too. There must be something similar near you.

There is also U3A which is nationwide and so is Meet up Groups. Have a Google whats available locally.

I also volunteer in a charity shop which I love. I sit behind the till and help customers. There are lots of options and I am sure you will find ones that suit you x

basten profile image
basten in reply to hypercat54

Oh thankyou very much for replying. I am sorry to hear of your lung issues but you are still very active and much stronger than me. I don't have a partner either . Yes I belong to U3A and used to go to French classes but it was too advanced for me. I am not a very arty person and admit I do have trouble mixing with ladies as I sometimes used to feel like an outsider and they were a bit clicky I am lucky to have found a new group for people who are isolated, depressed or addictions. It is run by a charity via the church and they are lovely non judgemental ladies and I feel very welcome there. This has given me reason to get up and dressed for There is at present only me and an alcoholic who attends we get a free dinner, make cards and play bingo. I did have my name down at a charity shop but they have enough volunteers. . I am lucky I do have children both do what they can to visit weekends but they never phone me in the week when days are long etc. I do admire your courage and optimism. I know I mustn't give up. I just have lost my mo jo at present. Thankyou so much for replying.

hypercat54 profile image
hypercat54 in reply to basten

Yes it's very easy to give up isn't it. It's not good for us though so keep going and pushing yourself x

Sillysausage234 profile image
Sillysausage234

☹️ Best wishes 🙏

basten profile image
basten in reply to Sillysausage234

Thankyou for your prayers.

NeuronerdDoaty profile image
NeuronerdDoaty

Hi. I’m here. Changes in life and mourning your soul mate pup all at once is so hard. I find the redundancy of the days to be too much at times. You’re not alone. There’s many of us and I’m sorry you’re going through this right now.

You are valid and you are loved. Right here.

Doaty💛

basten profile image
basten in reply to NeuronerdDoaty

God bless and thank you for replying.

Essarj profile image
Essarj

Dear B....just keep on writing your experiences.....you are not alone.in this pain and suffering.... And as u fight back u will give strength to others too. God bless....

basten profile image
basten in reply to Essarj

This site has given me some hope and lots of wonderful encouragement. I had to share my story and I'm so glad I did. People have given me hope and words of kindness...I needed it and one day I would like to help and be there for others in some way. Thankyou 🙏

Crochet1957 profile image
Crochet1957

So sad sorry for the loss of your dog your sons are busy but know they love you they care about you

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