False Calmness: This morning I was... - Anxiety and Depre...

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False Calmness

Wholefoods
Wholefoods

This morning I was prescribed Klonopin by my psychiatrist. It is actually making me feel exponentially better and that both makes me happy and scared at the same time. I know that this drug wears off, but I wish this feeling would not. I am able to focus decently well for the first time in weeks. It feels amazing. I have my first therapy session with my new therapist tomorrow morning and am looking forward to seeing where my relationship will go with her. I hope I am able to meet with her more than once a week. I still am yet to understand why my ex, who I am by no means over, is still texting me. I have asked her to stop before and she has neglected to do so. It doesn't makes sense to me because she knows how bad it effects me to see and hear from her. The only reason I have not blocked her is because of the hope involved in her even reaching out to me like this. Well I just hope the feeling from this new medication does not wear off soon, because for once I finally feel okay.

37 Replies
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I would give anything if my PA. Would precribe something to help calm me down I jump at the least little sound my insides feel right all the time. Good luck on your journey.

I didn't have to ask because she grasps the severity of what I am dealing with, but even if she didn't I was planning on asking her about it. Next time you go in I would recommend asking if you feel comfortable using the drug only when needed to help avoid the very addictive qualities of it.

Thanks I sure will do that.

I'm glad that you atleast got relief and feeling well even if it's not able to be constant.

Thank you, I am too

Hidden
Hidden

Oh how I know the wonders of klonopin...unfortunately. When I take it, I am ‘me’. It is wonderful. If only it weren’t so addictive. It’s just too good.

Wholefoods
Wholefoods in reply to Hidden

Taking it and feeling like yourself is a great way to explain it. Literally feels like a wall was put up against all of the pain i've been feeling these last few weeks. My chest doesn't feel like its caving in. I feel, dare I say it, pretty normal.

Hidden
Hidden in reply to Wholefoods

Right...that’s the problem with it...you feel so normal while it is in effect. Once it wears off, it’s back to the same old feelings. Enjoy the normalcy while you can as you deserve it. Are you taking anything else?

Wholefoods
Wholefoods in reply to Hidden

Yes I’ve been on Zoloft for around 3 weeks. I never wanted to have a benzodiazepine but it got to the point where she prescribed it and I was going to ask because it was too much.

Hidden
Hidden in reply to Wholefoods

Did the Zoloft not work for you? Benzos are great for short term use. They say that they are horrible to come off of. I have a relative who has taken them for over 20 years. Can you believe it? He is trying to cut down now but it’s tough. If only they could find an anti depressant that would work as well...the world would be ‘cured’!

Wholefoods
Wholefoods in reply to Hidden

I’m still taking it. It’s not known to kick in until being taken between 4-8 weeks so I’m still trying to see how it will be after taking it longer. 20 years is a long time for that my goodness. And yes lol the would would definitely be a little happier of a place

Hidden
Hidden in reply to Wholefoods

I have been on sertraline for 3 months. It’s not doing much. I am now considering Tms therapy as a last resort.

Wholefoods
Wholefoods in reply to Hidden

Tms therapy ?

Hidden
Hidden in reply to Wholefoods

Transmagnetic cranial stimulation to treat depression and anxiety. Very expensive.

MEGL53
MEGL53 in reply to Hidden

Anti depressants don’t work for me. I’ve tried them all. Effexor wa the only one that gave me no side effects. Combined with alprazolam as needed made me have quite some years of tranquillity and freedom. Then I started having bad ringing of the ears and the specialist said it was caused by the Effexor. And I had to get off of it. The withdrawal side effects were horrible and my tunitis got worse. I still have it and it’s forever. So between the horrible sound in my ear, vertigo and anxiety and panic attacks... I still live and try my best to be happy. So alprazolam is my best friend. I am responsible enough not to increase the doses. Just what is necessary. My family says ‘but it’s addictive ‘ I don’t care as long as I can live and let others around me live as well. Diabeics need insulin to survive, people with thyroid problems need medication to survive, and for a lifetime and I know because I have family with both diseases. So we... panic attack sufferers need to find a solution to survive. As long as we are careful with our doses. .05 mg in the morning and .05 in the evening is enough for me to not get panic. There are days when I need a .25 mg in the middle but that is if something unusual is going on. Now this is how it works for me. Follow your doctors instructions for what works for you!

Wholefoods
Wholefoods in reply to MEGL53

"Diabeics need insulin to survive, people with thyroid problems need medication to survive, and for a lifetime and I know because I have family with both diseases. So we... panic attack sufferers need to find a solution to survive." This was beautifully put. I would do anything to be able to function at a normal capacity during the day, because otherwise I just feel like I am wasting my life away. So I am glad I've found something that takes the edge off. Thank you for your insight, I really enjoyed your message.

MEGL53
MEGL53 in reply to Wholefoods

Wholefoods... we all need each other here for support. We rejoice when we are having a good day and sympathize when a not so good. I’m grateful to have found this group. Here for you! 🇵🇷🏝

NeuronerdDoaty
NeuronerdDoaty in reply to Hidden

I don’t care if it’s addictive. It keeps me ‘me’. My brain messes up so I obviously need it. Now I just wish Tootsie Rolls weren’t addictive.

Lol

Best news ever Wholefoods...this will give you a little break from your worries as you

work through this issue with your therapist. Good Luck with your therapy appointment

tomorrow. Together with medication, you should start feeling better soon. :) xx

Thank you so much for your constant support. I finally feel like I'm on my way to recovery.

Agora1
Agora1 in reply to Wholefoods

Believe in that and it will (with some work from you) happen. :) xx

That is not false calmness my friend. That is your brain being balanced enough to not send signals. That is what a non anxious brain is going to feel like. Ugh it really is a shame it’s addicting.

Anyway, from what I’m reading it appears you’re saying that her reaching out gives you hope but you also don’t want her to reach out? Please correct me if I am wrong.

~Lia

Wholefoods
Wholefoods in reply to TrustnGod

About her it is weird because it makes me think one day we can be together again, but at the same time since we are not together it hurts just aimlessly talking when all I want is to be with her and love her to the ability that I know how. I'm hoping me getting better will show her what we had was tainted not because of lost love, but because if issues within myself.

TrustnGod
TrustnGod in reply to Wholefoods

I think you’re going to have to come to some sort of a consensus my friend. Talking to her is clearly not benefiting your mental health. She also isn’t caring for you by texting you when what you need is time away from her to heal. It seems as though the only way you’ll be able to do that is if you block her even though that’s going to hurt. But as I said it’s your choice and I don’t blame you either way. I dealt with a toxic guy for years because I refused to just let him go.

~Lia

Hidden
Hidden in reply to TrustnGod

It is a shame that it is so addicting. Why can’t they find a non addictive medication that works as well?

Wholefoods
Wholefoods in reply to Hidden

Big Pharma wouldn’t like that lol

My GP has put me Pregabalin it’s incredible the panic/ anxiety has just disappeared

Wholefoods
Wholefoods in reply to Vectron

What is this a long or short term medication?

Vectron
Vectron in reply to Wholefoods

Long term it’s safe.

Wholefoods
Wholefoods in reply to Vectron

thank you I will check into that

Vectron
Vectron in reply to Wholefoods

You will not regyit😀

I understand where you’re coming from. My psychiatrist put me on Xanax and the relief gave me an even playing field. Also months and months of therapy and antidepressants have me in a good place. I had a breakdown that lasted for a year and a half and I’ve been relatively stable for a couple of months. Eventually we are going off the benzo, but for now he wants me to be level for a while longer. I’m glad you got some relief.

Good morning

It makes me feel good to know you are feeling better. Although I don't have disorder I live it everyday with my daughter. She has been on klonopin and unfortunately it didn't last long. She is on valium and some other meds she goes to counseling but nothing works she has racing thoughts anxiety and depression everyday. She stays home can't work can't go to school she is just alive and suffering all day. I'm so glad I found you all. I feel like there is hope thanks for sharing.

Hi. I've been taking klonipen for many years. When I am in a bad state of mind, it calms you down. It ramps up in about 10 minutes for me and can last about 4 to 6 hours or sometimes even longer. What I like is that it ramps down gradually. Some days I don't need any and sometimes I need more. I'm allowed up to 4 a day. I haven't taken any more than 2 a day in quite a while. It is addictive but it doesn't require you to take a certain number per day. I have gone without it for a couple of days but then you need to take some because it is addictive and don't feel good. Like I said it is addictive so if you wanted to stop taking it you would need to be weaned off of it slowly. Remember that they are benzodiazepine. Feel free to answer any questions.

I love my klonopin of which my children have renamed it ‘don’t cut a b$$ch’ pills. Mom is so much nicer.

lol!

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