So I just broke up with my boyfriend of 3 years and am completely broken. I know it was the right thing to do because he was slowly killing me with his constant inconsideration and narcissism but I’m so damn sad that I can’t stop crying. I put so much of myself into this relationship and feel completely abandoned and betrayed by his actions. The first week after we broke up, it was almost like I was on a high but for the last two, it’s been a downhill spiral. I’m crying all day every day, can barely eat and all I want to do is sleep. I don’t know what to do. I’m trying to get back to normal and have seen my therapist once and have another appointment with her next week but it just doesn’t seem to help the crying. I can’t seem to make it through a full day of work without bursting into tears. I’ve gone through breakups before and have no idea why this one is taking such a toll. Any advise from anyone who has gone through something like this would be greatly appreciated.
So damn sad: So I just broke up with my... - Anxiety and Depre...
So damn sad
I am going through something very similar right now, except I am the one who got broken up with by my girlfriend. We dated for around a year and a half and broke up around 5 or 6 weeks ago. I am still f******* crippled. It brought all of my anxiety and depression to the forefront of my life. I have been going to therapy and have gone on medication. I lost around 25 lbs because I could not eat in the first few weeks. In the relationship I let my anxiety and compulsive thoughts ruin the relationship by getting trapped in bad thoughts like "shes better than me" and "why should we still date, we are about to graduate college". Half of my brain would be screaming not to say these things, while I would dive deeper down the hole of saying more things to push her away. Got to the point where I was taking her love for granted over the summer because we live 5 and a half hours away while not in school. I wasn't able to feel my emotions for awhile over the summer and it lead to me not showing her the love she needed. After all of this reflection I know how to be the man she wants and needs, but she keeps saying "I can't do it right now". Its f****** crippling. Feels like there is a 50lb dumbbell on my chest every moment of the day. I am here for you and would love to share insights on how to get through this together. We are all here for you.
At least you have taken ownership of your part in the whole thing. My ex won’t even do that. He just keeps blaming me for leaving him saying “why didn’t I talk to him first”. But I did. Constantly. And he never listened. Now I’m broken and don’t know how to put myself back together. I feel drained and just want to go to sleep and not wake up.
I didn’t listen either but I would give him time to reflect on his actions and the relationship and possibly give him another chance. I’m waiting for another chance but I know I need to get better before hand. It sucks because I 100000% know what to do in the relationship and still cannot show her that because she basically won’t allow me to. She kept me grounded but I am an idiot so I am currently without the best girl of my life. You, just like me, need to rebuild yourself to be the happy person we know we can be. It’s going to be hard. Hell I can’t even see the light yet and it’s been over a month but we need to keep moving through this. I am here
My ex stole my money. Kinda forced me or I should say guilted me into sleeping with him like everyday. He was drunk one night and hit me. I had to break it off then. I felt like I died inside. I was broken. But I knew it was the right choice. For weeks I cried and felt numb. Then one day I relized how much better I was off. I read the book be here now by Raam Das. It helped me so much. Kinda weird but it brought me peace that I so needed. I sincerely hope you find peace of some kind. I wish you the best
A year after I healed. I met me husband. Whom I dearly love. You will find someone to treat you the way you deserve. Like king of the world. Again good luck to you
Thank you. I sincerely hope you are right.
Proud of you for what is a difficult thing to do. I walk out on a 14 year marriage, he became verbally abusive to me and our kids. I could see it becoming physical, we we're homeless for about 3 weeks, we left with only some clothes. Life can be tough sometimes, but we pull through, this happened 20 year's ago. Just like he was a Bad father, now he's a Bad grandfather. Stand you're ground, he's going to tell you anything he can to get you Back? Get into some counciling, if you go Back you might Not leave with your Life?
Wow that does sound tough but good for you for doing what was best for you and your kids. My ex and I did counselling earlier this year and it “worked” temporarily which really means it didn’t work at all. I know I’m better off not being in such a toxic relationship but it still breaks my heart. I feel like I’ve been lied to and abused. Time heals all wounds I suppose. It just sucks that time drags on at times like these.
Thanks, it was. .my kids thank me for doing what I did. My ex is stuck with the woman we split up over, she very ill now, being the ass that he was and always will be, can't wait for her to die, says he's keeping up with the insurance payments telling our kids. They have No Respect for him. Yea, sounds like counciling was a waste of time for you. Your will be better with out him. I hope you'll continue counciling for your self, you deserve it.
I bet that makes you feel much better about your decision to leave when even your kids acknowledge how much better you all are for it. It takes a lot of courage and strength to do what you did and I applaud you 300%! You stuck to your guns and made it work and look how much better you and your kids are. I’m so glad my ex and I never had any kids as we were talking of trying when shit hit the fan. I am continuing my counselling and strive everyday to be better than I was the day before but there are always setbacks and, even though I know that’s part of life, the setbacks can be really hard to get through. Thank you for your support and kindness. I truly appreciate it. You definitely deserve better than your ex. He sounds like a really piece of trash if you don’t mind my saying. I can’t speak from experience but I’m sure being a single mom is one of the hardest things any women can do but you just set one of the best examples for your children by showing them what self love and self worth really is by choosing a better life for yourself and them and walking away. I hope you feel proud of how you’ve grown and the woman you have modelled to your children. I would be 😊
Thank, I don't mind what you said about my ex, Ive said worse. He'll have God to deal with at the end of the day. Yea, my kids are better off, their relationship with him is Luke warm at best. He's no better as a grandfather, his says he'll pick up our grandson then doesn't show up. I've told my daughter to tell her dad to Not make promises to her son, he'll grow up to not trust what he's told?
Did you find someone new after you left? How long has it been since you walked away? How did you deal with it when you felt so low, you thought you could just go to sleep and not wake up? I made the stupid mistake of talking to my ex tonight and got so angry I lashed out and said every hurtful thing I have been holding back. I don’t know if I regret lashing out or if I just regret talking to him at all. I want closure and he was being so dodgey that I just exploded.
I waited about almost 2 years before I started dating. Want to make sure my kids were ok. Then asked them if they we're ok with it, they said yes. I kept myself busy working, it's been over 20 year's, in still with my boyfriend 18 years. No plans to remarry, done it twice. Sometimes now and then I don't care if I wake up or Not? I have so many health issues, don't feel like I'm living. I'm starting a new job tomorrow, feeling sick afraid I won't be able to do it?
You are so strong and have been through so much. You deserve to be happy and enjoy life again. I wish I could hug you.
Awwe, thank you, have a Blessed day 🙏
Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same. We have to find the courage to let go of what we can’t change Of course, easier said than done...I have been there before, crippled and darn sad. The way they leave tells you everything about them. So it’s fine to be hurt, angry, to cry and scream... but you know what? When you less expect it you’ll have a smile on your face and you’ll move on! You will survive even with your ups and downs! I did♥️ take care🇵🇷🏝
I guess that’s why so many people stay in unhealthy relationships eh? Leaving, while it’s the right thing to do, is too hard so they pick what they feel is easiest and stay. I was like that with my first serious relationship in my twenties and said never again. My health deteriorates so fast when I’m with unhealthy people. You definitely are right. Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same. It definitely is in this case.
You deserve someone who will love you unconditionally. I had given up after two divorces. But I have found that man now at my age who treats me like his queen no matter if I’m having a good day or a worse day. I really hope you find your soulmate!
So do I. I know we put so much pressure on ourselves to get married and have a family and I feel I’m running out of time. All my friends are married or with their forever partners and I feel so alone.
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