I don’t know what to do anymore

[Wallflowers]

My depression and anxiety have been tearing my life apart the last 2 months. I feel like I have no one to talk to... my boyfriend doesn’t understand anxiety or depression. He tries to be there but he doesn’t know what to do to help. And I hate inconveniencing him by venting about all of the negative things in my head. All of my friends have moved away... I have a few that I call when I really need someone to talk to but I still feel like they don’t really understand. I feel like my life is pointless and I’m just running in place. I have no motivation to do anything. I have no friends to get me outside to do things. I don’t know... I know I’m rambling right now. I just feel so hopeless and messed up in my head and I don’t know how to make it stop. I don’t know if it will ever get better. I just really want people to talk to. I want to know what to do

[Kadenvaldez2015]

Im here and I understand what your going through ive been feeling that way for a long time your not alone

[CatIsMyCopilot]

I think it's unfortunately common to feel at our most isolated at the exact time when we are struggling the most. I felt very alone as soon as I developed an anxiety disorder. Whereas just before that, I felt fine about my friendships and connections.

Just know that everything you're feeling is very common in anxiety and depression. These things *can* improve though, and do for most people. This is a good place to come and vent, when you need to.

[Pugglesworth]

Hi Jessica.

My advice is to get the support you need to live with your depression and anxiety. This will most likely involve a therapist, psychologist and/or psychiatrist. You can't do this alone. None of us can. The good news is that there is plenty of help available. There are counselors who have sliding scales if payment is an issue (if you're in the US). There are also many good resources on this site.

The negative things in your head? We all have them. The brain simply parrots back what's been put into it. It has nothing against you personally. It's a 'garbage in, garbage out' thing. Our mind works with the information it's been given. That's where the support comes in. You need to help your mind re-frame it's information. That can include therapy, medication, exercise, eating right and many other methods of re-training your mind.

What to do? Well, you've already began by reaching out. The next steps are up to you.

[Jeff1943]

Let's start at the beginning, Jessica. Do you know what has traumatised your nervous system for you to feel like this? The usual suspects include over work, worry about a loved one, grief, guilt, money worries, loss, disappointment, toxic relationships.

If you know then I suggest you do everything to neutralise the negative cause, this may mean you being absolutely ruthless. But make the change to protect your mental well-being.

I think you are maybe experiencing nervous exhaustion. Anxiety is a perfectly normal reaction to stress but when we reach the point of stress overload our nerves start to complain. They become over sensitised and start giving us strange thoughts and bad feelings. Even when we sense it's our nerves playing up it can still keep happening.

Nervous exhaustion can soon follow leaving us depleted: we become depressed about our anxiety.

We end up in a vicious circle of anxiety causing fear causing more nervous sensitisation causing more anxiety causing more fear causing more nervous sensitisation and so on.

Recovery depends on breaking this vicious circle to stop the continual release of stress and fear hormones that are keeping your nerves over sensitised.

In a sentence, you need to stop fighting your symptoms and bad feelings and just accept them for the time being. Agree to live with them a little longer but without attaching to them the importance they don't deserve.

This way you stop flooding your system with stress and fear hormones and eventually your nerves return to normal and you recover your quiet mind. But you must be prepared to let time pass, this is not a quick fix.

You see, anxiety doesn't like being ignored. It thrives on lots of attention. If you stop giving it attention it goes away.

[Hidden]

Hey I’m here if you need to talk. Ive been going through something similar for the past 5 weeks. My anxiety and depression has been suffocating. It feels like I’m walking 20 feet under water each second of the day it it hinders my ability to live, think and enjoy anything. I don’t know how to make it stop either but I do know that I’m here to help and everyone is. We will make it through this.

[Wallflowers in reply to Hidden]

Thank you. I’m so sorry you’re also going through this, yet at the same time in some screwed up horrible way I am glad I’m not alone. I’m here if you’d ever like to vent as well

[Hidden in reply to Wallflowers]

Thank you so much for speaking up. This shit is the absolute worst. I understand. this shit is a nightmare. Im with friends right now and still am paralyzed by this. Im always here if you need to talk. I am looking across from where my ex is and it feels like I’m folding into pieces. I’ve had fun tonight but at the same time my anxiety and depression is weighing me down.

[Ollyvie]

Hello Jessicasimon, am sorry to hear of what you are going through right now and can understand how you are feeling. I know sometimes it hard for friends and family to understand what you are going through. Now that you don’t have friends around, I guess you might have to make new friends. Its may take a while but you will find good ones. Church is one place you can make some friends if you join a group or may be gym or yoga class. That might help relax and exercise as well. You don’t have to go through this alone. I know counselling also help, so in case you need help finding a counselor near you or if you need to talk to someone about this you can call 1-855-771-HELP (4357) for counseling consultation. Am also here whenever you need to chat, sending hugs and prayers your way