Being labeled by someone that you have been so loyal to as an attention seeker

[Sabbath_Star]

Hello and good evening. I have been in a mini slump since yesterday as someone I know at a place that I volunteer at that helps mentally ill people re emerge in society and feel confident about themselves has labeled me as an attention seeker. I tried to walk away several times from conversations that I didn’t feel comfortable listening to and even if I tried to tell this person who is a staff person that if I needed to step out cause I was not feeling comfortable although the conversations that were taking place were non confidential, I still would’ve been called an attention seeker period. Now even here where it’s late for me and no one to talk to at all, the only thing I could do is run away and isolate. I also am thinking about going to the emergency room to talk to someone about this matter as well. The shame I have put on myself is spreading inside and there is nothing I could do to stop it at all. All I need is help and opinions on what being labeled means to people since I feel I have became a label as well. Thank you very much indeed

[Agora1]

Hi Sabbath Star, I'm so sorry this has happened to you. I do think it can

be very helpful in talking about your feelings. I admire you in volunteering

at a mental health facility. How cruel of someone to say that you are an

attention seeker. I would never allow myself to feel a shame or feel that

I have a label on myself. We do the best we can with what we have been

given in life. No one has the right to label anyone. You don't deserve it.

It's a little quiet on Friday night but I will be up for a little while if you need

to talk. Right now you need a compassionate listening ear and not one who

is condescending. Stay positive, Stay strong. We've got your back. x

[Sabbath_Star in reply to Agora1]

Agora1: thanks for your response you have indeed been one of the people I tend to see read my posts here. Another big problem is in this state of mind I am in there is no one to talk to me since either they are not feeling up to it or not around. My biggest concern is that I’ll have to live with the label while those people talk bad about me behind closed doors. A mammoth challenge I have is making it through the weekend unscathed since I also feel afraid to reach out to anyone without getting rejected.

[Agora1 in reply to Sabbath_Star]

Oh that makes me so sad. The one thing you know about this forum site is that

it is a safe place to come where we aren't judged or put down. It's too bad the

real world couldn't learn something from the amazing people on this site.

Sabbath Star, I've been working on myself for many years now. I use to isolate

and think people were talking about me or looking at me like they could tell I was

anxious. I began to realize that I was worthy of more than this in life. I wasn't

going to let someone change who I was in order to become what they needed.

I just wasn't going to do that. I started to believe in myself.

We are all here for a reason. We all deserve to be respected no matter who we

are. At first I thought I had just developed a tough skin but later realized that I

had just become more confident in myself. It no longer mattered what others thought

because I was comfortable with me. x

[Sabbath_Star in reply to Agora1]

Agora1: that is a great example that you explained. I do read a lot of self help books as well as practice the proper coping strategies I utilize with great effort. I am also grateful that I do have a therapist as well although there was a stretch in the past that I did not have one for almost a year. The thing per your example is that to be grateful for what you have in life such as a place to live or hobbies that you take to heart for instance. Just got to learn to have more courage in life.

[Agora1 in reply to Sabbath_Star]

You are on the right path my friend, it just takes time. Our mental health issues

didn't happen overnight and so need some time to retrain ourselves in living our

life for us. I did the self help books as well as finding out anything and everything

I could about my problem. As for therapy, I had it multiple times a week through

phone sessions because I was agoraphobic for 5 years. It was during that time

that I learned through researching and reading in how to get control back of my

life.

Reading Dr. Claire Weekes' book on "Hope & Help for your Nerves" was the foundation to my finally accepting anxiety as not harmful, not threatening and

learning more about the Mind/Body Connection.

Keep doing what you are doing. Work with your therapist. I wasted so many years

in not really listening but talking nervously until my time was up. I learned nothing

until I sat back and listened to what she had to say. It was then and only then that

I walked away with the knowledge and professional advice she gave to me.

You are going to be okay. I'm glad you are on the forum. As you interact with others,

it will help you not feel so alone. There's strength in number and we have over 40,000 members who share our feelings. I enjoyed talking with you tonight.

I'm going to call it a night for now. I'm in Chicago and it's coming up to midnight.

I'm on every day from morning til night. I hope you will be okay this evening.

Take care, stay positive, stay safe. Goodnight friend x

[Sabbath_Star in reply to Agora1]

Thank you very much indeed for your support. Good night to you.

[Sabbath_Star]

fauxartist: thank you very much indeed for responding. That is exactly what the criteria is in this matter. If I talk to the person and if things don’t work out hopefully her superior will listen and come up with a solution to this matter (if they don’t shoot me down). I have lost sleep (including none last night) and have not been eating as much but will hope to have the energy to function long enough to make it through the day.

[mvillarreal]

I'm sorry this happened to you. It is completely unprofessional and inappropriate. If after you talk with this person, it doesn't work out, would you know who this person's supervisor is? Maybe take the issue to them? Also, please know that this label is NOT you. It's clear that you did what you did because you legitimately felt uncomfortable. You are not an attention seeker, and the person who said this should be ashamed, not you.

[Sabbath_Star in reply to mvillarreal]

mvillarreal: I do love those suggestions. I eventually worked it out and all matters and parties are back on an even keel. So if it does happen again I know what to do. As far as the labeling, we r not them, it’s only 4 the cans of soup. #BreakTheStigma

[Sabbath_Star]

fauxartist: I eventually talked it over with that person and all parties are back on an even keel once again. But I think I shall think of those suggestions you told me about if it does happen again. Thank you very much indeed for all your suggestions