Fighting suicidal thoughts,sinking in... - Anxiety and Depre...

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Fighting suicidal thoughts,sinking in depression

Joy28 profile image

For about 2 months now I've been struggling with suicidal thoughts and also going through bipolar depression. It's like I'm losing everyday, when I think I'm getting depression just comes back again. I think about killing myself everyday and I fight these thoughts all the time. I don't get a lot of support from my family and that makes things very hard. I feel so alone....

#MentalillnessIsReal

18 Replies

Hi Joy. I've dealt with these thoughts as well. Ask yourself this: do you want to not be here anymore, or do you just want relief from pain? I found that the latter was always the case for me, once I took time to really look at it.

Joy28 profile image
Joy28 in reply to JAYnLA

I just want to end the pain. It's so hard for me I'm really struggling

JAYnLA profile image
JAYnLA in reply to Joy28

I have been there. Trust me. I totally understand. But knowing that what you really want is to end the pain and that this is different from giving up on the rest of your life is important. There will come a time where this acute pain will be in your past and you will have a life that you enjoy living. We're just in a dark tunnel at the moment. All tunnels end, so you don't need to. Of course, if you start feeling like you might hurt yourself, go for help immediately. I did, and I needed to.

Joy28 profile image
Joy28 in reply to JAYnLA

I hope things will get better soon. I'm in South Africa and mental illness is not taken seriously here. I'll be seeing my psychiatrist next week l, I hope I'll be able to survive till then.

JAYnLA profile image
JAYnLA in reply to Joy28

You can totally survive. Keep in touch with us here as much as you need to.

Thank you for being so honest with the way you are feeling. You are not alone!! I struggle with similar thoughts. When I get really deep into depression I get out a daily calendar. I try and list out at least one thing on every day that I can look forward to. Even if it’s something small like a tv show. That has really helped me to look forward to things.

Please feel free to message me anytime if you want to talk!! 💜💜

Joy28 profile image
Joy28 in reply to

Rose I feel so alone. I pretend to be okay everyday because my family doesn't believe in mental illness. I overdose with sleeping tablets so that I can just sleep and not feel the pain

im going through depression right now too and i also feel like im losing everyday but i tell myself it will get better

Joy28 profile image
Joy28 in reply to youn

When will it get better? I feel like I'm getting worse

Do you have anyone who you feel WILL support you? It can be so comforting sometimes just to have someone to be with you when you're feeling like that. I'm sorry you're feeling this way. Please seek help (Suicide Hotline is a great source!) if you feel like the suicidal thoughts are becoming powerful.

Joy28 profile image
Joy28 in reply to mvillarreal

I have no support and that makes things harder for me. My family doesn't believe in mental illness so I can't tell them how I feel

mvillarreal profile image
mvillarreal in reply to Joy28

Do you have friends or anyone who you think would try to empathize? Even a religious leader, counselor, or somebody like that?

We are here to listen and support you. Share your burden with us and we can all carry it together. You are not alone here. 🤗

Joy28 profile image
Joy28 in reply to

Thank you

I to have those thoughts from time to time. I stop and look st my blessings. Things could be so much worse for me. I have days I struggle to get out of bed. My kids don’t understand. They are grown. Just try to look at your blessings. And know things will get better.

Joy28 profile image
Joy28 in reply to Destiny8277

I will try to do that

You know I had a good day. A blessing. I seen two of my grandsons. And my oldest son who I have not seen in a year. That is what keeps me going. That hug from my son. Omg!! I can’t explain the love. I hope your day today is better!!! We have to count on those blessings to get us out of our slumps.

How are you doing these days

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