Not good today

[Gillyflower18]

Down today. I promised to go to my sister’s house for dinner today and I’m just dreading it. I don’t want to go anywhere and am both anxious and depressed. I’m trying to get myself together to face another work week. Anxiety symptoms are getting to me. I feel spacey and dizzy and have nobody to talk to here. Near tears again.

[Jeff1943]

Accept your feelings of anxiety for the moment and carry on as normal which means going to your sister's house for dinner.

I'm not talking about 'putting up' with your anxiety, I'm suggesting you utterly accept it for the time being. Why not?

Is your sister going to poison you? Are you going to be kidnapped by aliens from the planet Pluto? Are you going to collapse on the way there?

Of course you're not. So why not get on with your life which means visiting your sister for Easter? What's stopping you? An undefined thought that something bad is going to happen when you know for sure it isn't?

Why allow a 'thought' to rule your life? Why let fear of what might happen to flood your nervous system - causing it to become even more over sensitised? It is that nervous sensitisation that is causing and prolonging your anxiety disorder and the depression that comes out of anxiety.

So instead of adding second fear to the stab of first fear, accept your anxiety and carry on with your life despite the bad feelings. You can't accept something and fear it at the same time. Choose acceptance (for the time being) and halt the flow of fear hormones that are keeping your nervous system over sensitised.

That gives your nerves time to recover and the over sensitisation disperses and you regain your quiet mind once more.

So the secret is: Learn to live with your anxiety and you'll be able to live without it.

[Gillyflower18 in reply to Jeff1943]

Thanks Jeff. Your replies to people always are helpful. I chickened out this time. It’s not so much my anxiety and depression which I am working to accept it’s the negative atmosphere at my sisters. They are always arguing and being nasty to each other and my sis is a woe is me type. Just couldn’t face it today on top of how I’m feeling. I am trying to follow the ideas in Claire Weeks book. I think she’s on point. Sometimes I’m weak like today. I took my nerves out in the garden and weeded and edged a bed. Getting my hands in dirt always helps a little.

[Jeff1943 in reply to Gillyflower18]

I know what you're saying, Spinner1916. We have no obligation to spend time with those who make us feel uncomfortable. That includes relatives🤔

[UB4me]

I struggled with panic and depression recently. It was a struggle to go anywhere. I was afraid I would have a panic attack any time. My husband is a licensed counselor and he would always encourage me to try to continue to do "normal" things. The more that I isolated myself, the worse I felt. There was a level of healing that came with recognizing that I could do small things and that came with each successful outing. I encourage you to be kind to yourself and just try to take one step at a time.