Fear of going crazy: I was supposed to... - Anxiety and Depre...

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Fear of going crazy

Kevin160 profile image
14 Replies

I was supposed to get therapy but i started feeling better and my parents who were never very supportive said i dont need it, and because i talked alot im so tired of explaining how many times i needed therapy

Just had an almost panic attack, i have been having these weird scary thoughts that just pop up , both spiritually, religiously, thoughts about dying, the afterlife, things like that ...its scary that i will have to face death at some point , and not knowing when , just the anticipation of life, what could happen ..im just scared

I just FEAR going insane , i just started thinking of it and im starting to have a panic attack ...im deathly worried about starting to go insane , my memory today seems foggy and i seem to panic alot

I worry thta i will start to lose my memory , just do things without thinking and losing my quality of life or dying ...i feel tired and scared ..im worried i will act like crazy people we see at tv shows and movies ..my anxiety just switches from one thing to another its so terrible , i think im having a panic attack thats why i feel foggy and maybe sleepy , but i just feel unconcentrated and this makes me feel more scared , i mean i can usually calm myself and explain that this will never happen but now iñwhenever i try tomexplain and convince myself i will be ok i feel like my herat sinks and im going to throw up ...im shaking suddenly , i felt so calm these past few days

I didnt panic this hard in so long

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Kevin160 profile image
Kevin160
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14 Replies
JAYnLA profile image
JAYnLA

Hey Kevin. Pretty much everyone here has had these fears. They are fears - negative thoughts. So, what to do when having them? Posting here is a good thing, but I also want to pass on what my therapist has me doing. Go out for a walk and engage your senses. Notice the air on your skin. Chew some gum and notice the flavor. Notice the colors around you. Notice the textures around you. And breathe. Evenly, slowly and deeply. This helps me, I hope it helps you.

Kevin160 profile image
Kevin160 in reply to JAYnLA

I probably annoyed you with all the posts and i cant tell you how much it means to have someone to reassure me , i guess i wouldnt normally get this fear but today i just wasnt doing my best as you can tell , and i feel my brain is just foggy , i cant even concentrate on speaking and talking , i know my fears are irrational and that there is so link between anxiety and going crazy its not possible, but my fears as i said are irrational

I hope i sleep well and stop worrying about this , i just feel tired and sleepy maybe thats what caused all these thoughts , my brain just feel foggy and that im not focused , so weird especially since i have been doing well for so lomg , i guess it needs time to prove my fears wont happen, because as i know they arent real i have to wait it out to realize it, for example i watch movies or shows and think some sci-fi or horror movie plots could come true but i know deep down it would never happen , but i only calm when enough time passes for me to realize im 100% fine

JAYnLA profile image
JAYnLA in reply to Kevin160

If posts were annoying I wouldn't visit this site! That's what it's for. I think you're wearing yourself out. Try some of the suggestions I've made, get some rest, if you can download an audiobook by Dr. Claire Weeks on nervous illness and listen to it. You're going to be okay Kevin!

Kevin160 profile image
Kevin160 in reply to JAYnLA

Thank you, i actually did some of the things you told me , i took a walk , thought about some of the things that makes me human, emotions, feelings, i started thinking about things like music, art, and things i like, and how they shaped my personality , i felt much calmer i guess that was the panic attack talking ..i mean as imsaid im not really afraid of going crazy, im afraid of convincing myself i am , because deep down im aware i wouldnt go crazy especially aftr all the months of anxiety and learning what i did and getting better , im just afraid of convincing myself, and experience mental physical symptoms , and just thinking of it i believe is worse than experiencing it , because you worry and make assumptions, im trying my best but im much better now ...again im so grateful❤️❤️❤️

JAYnLA profile image
JAYnLA in reply to Kevin160

Good job buddy. We carry our tools with us everywhere we go, it's just hard to remember them when we're in the thick of it sometimes!

Kevin160 profile image
Kevin160 in reply to JAYnLA

Very true ..thank you for everything ;)

Jklassen42 profile image
Jklassen42 in reply to JAYnLA

This whole post made me very happy Jay. I told myself I'm going to give some advice on this forum once a day, clicked on this post and saw the positivity in it, your a good person Jay, and Kevin I relate to all of this, I took a walk in nature did deep breathing it helps a lot to engage yourself. Panic attacks come from shallow breathing next time you feel panic rising do 6 deep breaths in and out 4 seconds each breath and I guarantee it will subside the panic I do it daily works every time

Kevin160 profile image
Kevin160 in reply to Jklassen42

I will try that thank you so much , you are right , jay is an incredible person, and so are you ..you helping me and other people is very much appreciated ❤️❤️

DavMath2 profile image
DavMath2

Man this brings back memories from when my anxiety and severe panic attacks started, I prayed thanking god for the one in this world he has given me cause I just knew I was dead, that was 9 years ago!! Now my experience is we can make ourself feel things like pains and what not and worry ourself things are wrong cause your muscles hurt in your chest and “oh it’s a heart attack” when it’s not! My point being if you have been checked by a doc and are all good then when it starts to happen breath in and say to yourself “good thoughts in” and when you breath out say “bad thoughts out” it’ll focus you on breathing and keep our mind off things that panic you and also make you breath properly and into your stomach and not your chest also think logically ask yourself what PROOF do I have that I have an issue that you’re worried about!!!!! More than likely NONE when you have these thoughts see it and let them go I know easier said than done but we have to or we will freak out and convince ourself that we really have an issue and don’t! God bless!

thedoulamom profile image
thedoulamom

Hey Kevin,

Sometimes when we begin to feel better can really be the worst times for us, because it's in those moments when we start having all of these fearful anxieties surface. I very much encourage you to go to therapy. As loving as I'm sure your parents are, unless they know anything about anxiety and depression, they shouldn't be telling you what you should/shouldn't do about it. Get the help you need. Don't let anyone else's opinions or fears or whatever get in the way of you being the best version of yourself you can be!

Kevin160 profile image
Kevin160 in reply to thedoulamom

Well, i have tried , the first time i told them i wanted to go to therapy was in january, my anxiety was sooooo much worse , i couldnt sleep,eat, arely breath and move, i was always in bed fearing to move i swear, i couldnt stay alone without panicking, but i couldnt sit with people without feeling im having a panic attack, i felt like theres no way out , i didnt know any of the things i know now, the power of accepting anxiety, how it wont kill me , how deep beathing and meditation helo too, now im feeling so much better and anxiety is actually not constant like for a while it became weeks were i would have no anxiety , and i can handle anything , but i just worry i cant handle the pressure and whenever i feel like i overcame something , something else comes ..first it was blood pressure and pulse health anxiety , then it was just death anxiety, now its fear of going crazy and losing the quality of life without dying ..and i know its irrational as i woke up i felt what the hell was i thinking , im feeling much better and it was probably the anxiety attack talking but i still get heart palpitations and worry myself sometimes

I would try therapy but i cant right now, i have to wait to be able to finance it myself , i just need reassurance every once in a while and i will be fine , i came along way and im feeling the best i have in months

Vinnie77 profile image
Vinnie77 in reply to Kevin160

Your fight or flight has been set off. Ask your Dr. To check your b12 levels as well as your d. I was just like this and my b12 was under 300. Anything below 500 isn't good. I got on b12 shots and am taking folic acid along with b12 drops and it was so helpful. Although I still get anxiety,its not anywhere near what it was.

Kevin160 profile image
Kevin160 in reply to Vinnie77

I recently got blood tests a few months back, and they were all great , blood sugar, total blood count, iron, vitamins, maybe vitamin D was low but everything else such as b12 folic acid etc..even urine and stool samples were all within good range

Vinnie77 profile image
Vinnie77

First,you are not alone. I promise. Almost everyone who suffers from Depression and anxiety/ panic attacks feels like this. U should see a therapist if you feel you need it. Do not listen to anyone who isn't supporting anything that's going to help you.

I sometimes feel like I'm crazy myself and I feel separated from my body. In a fog,funk. I'm present but I'm not at the same time. There is hope but this is what depression is. Obsessive thoughts and worry are as well. Seek support please.

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