I have depression,anxiety and anhedonia. - Anxiety and Depre...

Anxiety and Depression Support

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I have depression,anxiety and anhedonia.

digitalmentalist profile image

I am joining this community for support and to hear about others with similar problems and what they may be doing for their symptoms, I suffer from debilitating depression.anxiety and worst of all anhedonia. While signing up the term anhedonia did not come up so I guess I might need to define it to some. Anhedonia is a condition, at least the way I experience it, where I am unable to feel emotional pleasure. With the exception of music which still gives me a certain amount of pleasure. I think it is due to my anxiety because on rare occasions when I feel genuinely relaxed (this is very rare) I can feel some pleasurable emotions. Ironically I can feel other peoples pleasurable emotions. When I am around a person who is very happy I can feel some happiness. This condition is true torture as I never feel any peace of mind.

I have also discovered that a drug called Tramadol when I take it on rare occasions (cannot take daily due to the fact that it is addictive) after 2 hours I suddenly get a burst of energy and for about 4 hours I feel normal and the anhedonia goes away somewhat, And I start to be motivated to do things. The only reason I have tried this is that other drugs don't help, In the 1990s I was on Lorazepam which worked great for ten years. Since 2000 it no longer worked. (I blame the greedy drug company Milan)

Lyrica is no being considered as a safer anxiolytic. But at $450.00 a prescription, I cannot afford it Has anyone had any success with other non-benzo tranquilizers? I also suffer from many phobias.

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digitalmentalist
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16 Replies
jkl5500 profile image
jkl5500

That's an impressive picture! I'm not a doctor, but I do know from experience that it's very hard to have any kind of happiness or pleasure when you feel like your brain's on fire! I would think that a constant state of anxiety would tend to suppress any positive, uplifting emotions. As for non-drug treatments, I have tried CBD oil with mixed success. There is no THC in the oil, so you won't end up like Cheech and Chong. CBD oil is rather mild in its effect (in my opinion), and it is fairly expensive, so you'll have to decide for yourself whether it's worth a try.

digitalmentalist profile image
digitalmentalist in reply to jkl5500

Real THC works way better than CBD and is cheaper

Lazy_dog_lover profile image
Lazy_dog_lover

My antidepressants and my depression both kill off my feelings. I don't know much about anhedonia. How do you know it is separate from the depression?

Clonazepam is another alternative to lorazepam. Gives longer lasting effects than lorazepam. I don't know the cost. Are you in the US? Did you look on GoodRX website for better costs?

Tramadol is very addictive. It is a painkiller, so the energy may just be coming from you releasing what you try to hold in all day. This makes me think you might benefit from natural endorphins being released. Do you exercise? When I used the weight machines at the gym, I would actually yawn. My doc said those were the natural endorphins being released. I got better sleep, then, too.

If you like music, try yoga. They usually have background music that you can concentrate on. Walk with earbuds/headphones outside if possible to get the vitamins from the sunlight. Put a full spectrum lightbulb in your living room where you sit, not by your bed.

Do you use electronics a lot? Try blue screen filters. I have heard both + and - about impact, but they can be inexpensive. I am getting new glasses, today, and the antireflective coating is supposed to help that, but they also halve just blue blockers.

Welcome to the group.

digitalmentalist profile image
digitalmentalist in reply to Lazy_dog_lover

Yes, I have tried exercise but unless I do EXTENDED long term heavy exercise it doesn't work and I feel too depressed to do it so long. It helped when I was younger. plus doing long exercise at the gym is so boring especially with my anhedonia. Another thing that used to help was hot cold shock treatments that I invented. I would get super hot in the steam room then jump into a cold shower.

About the tramadol. Yes, I did mention it was addictive and that I only use it on occasion.Cannot tell you why it works but it just does. That makes it worth taking maybe no more than once a week so that I at least feel great once and a while instead of never. It has been the only thing that has taken me from the depths of despair and exhausted feelings to having great energy and an elevated mood. Something antidepressants are supposed to do. Antidepressants give me energy but give me anxiety also and they don't stop working at night so I cannot sleep. The tramadol wares off at the end of the day leaving me quite relaxed and able to sleep.

By the way, I would never recommend taking Clonapin since it is the most dangerous Benzo to come off of. In fact, it was Comming off of Clonapin that gave me the chronic anxiety and anhedonia in the first place. My stupid psychiatrist took me off Lorazepam and put me on Klonopin then took me off of that. I was fine before he did that.

Lazy_dog_lover profile image
Lazy_dog_lover in reply to digitalmentalist

Thyroid and Vitamin D levels normal?

I had a friend that would go to the batting cages to burn energy. Maybe a different style of exercise? Other hobbies? You need to release endorphins. BTW what do you focus your mind on when working out? Do you perseverate on issues or think about positive things?

I did not have much luck with deep brain stimulation. But some have. I'd recommend group therapy, since you can empathize with others.

There are lots of drugs on the market, keep asking to try different ones. I had to add a stimulant. It's all about the right cocktail.

digitalmentalist profile image
digitalmentalist in reply to Lazy_dog_lover

Yes, I would like to try other drugs but the prices of most new drugs are through the roof. There is a drug called Lyrica. It has been known first in Europe and now in the US to be as potent as lorazepam as an anxiolytic. But it costs $450.00 a prescription. There are always new drugs but they are expensive.

When I exercise I listen to music using a cell phone and earphones.

Lazy_dog_lover profile image
Lazy_dog_lover in reply to digitalmentalist

Lyrica has a lot of TV ads, so the cost is paying for those. Even GoodRx is about $460. There are several alternative drugs to Lyrica. Ask about Gabapentin or amitriptyline.

Keep up the fight and group exercise classes like spin class. Research alternatives to release endorphins. Dark chocolate, cardio, go see a comedy show, music, lavender scent, acupuncture, massage, ginseng, spicy foods, or volunteer, for example.

Keep trying different antidepressants. Might need a full cleanse to clear the system and start fresh.

digitalmentalist profile image
digitalmentalist in reply to Lazy_dog_lover

The word anhedonia seems to be a word not used on this site. . It means that i cannot feel pleasure. Other feelings i can experience. It is torture since I cannot find anything that gives me joy. no feelings of inner peace at all. The only thing I can still get pleasure out of is having an orgasm but I have to do that myself since the anhedonia causes ED so I cannot even have sex with a woman. I still get some pleasure from listening to music.

Let's talk about the Tramadol again just to clarify a few things. I do not get those feelings with any other opiate. I had a car accident a while ago and after li left the hospital I was some painkiller that I don't remember the name of. I took one and I got a very bad reaction to it mentally. I researched tramadol and it does say that it has ingredients that act as an antidepressant. Never the less I was not recommending it. to anyone. And i think I was pretty clear in saying that it is addictive and that I only take it occasionally. I cannot say why it works. And now it was not releasing any pent up emotions since the word Anhedonia does not refer to holding back emotions but there are no emotions in the first place. I have tried Klonopin but that happens to be the most dangerous of all of the benzos. It is the most addictive of them all.

Excersize. I have been doing that with no results. I don't have the energy to do it as long as it is needed for my body to release endorphins. When I was a lot younger I was able to do cardio for hours and then it released my endorphins. Also, my anhedonia causes me to get bored easily. And exercising is painfully boring. I exercise vigorously 2 hours a day but no endorphins. I do however find that when I am extremely relaxed which rarely happens, the anhedonia improves.

Lazy_dog_lover profile image
Lazy_dog_lover in reply to digitalmentalist

Ok, I got all that the first time. I was just brainstorming.

I am not a doctor. Only a specialist can weigh all of those variables and make a plan.

I am sorry you are feeling the way you do. At least you can find some pleasure in some things. I don't really even have that.

Don't give up.

digitalmentalist profile image
digitalmentalist in reply to Lazy_dog_lover

The only type of exercise that really works is dancing, more specifically disco dancing since the music would give me the drive to dance. But no does that anymore.

Lazy_dog_lover profile image
Lazy_dog_lover in reply to digitalmentalist

You can disco a any time you like. Set up a Spotify or Pandora acct and dance around the house.

Where are you geographically? I bet there are groups or clubs that do retro nights. Country music has line dancing that is so similar to disco in many ways. Have you tried line dancing?

digitalmentalist profile image
digitalmentalist in reply to Lazy_dog_lover

Long Island NY. here everyone gets lost in social media and rarely leave the house.

Though I hear that in parts of Europe disco is still popular. Yea dancing at home isn't going to cut it. It lacks the spirit of the disco tech. The point is I want to dance with others in a place where they have a loud fantastic sound system.

pianoplayer90 profile image
pianoplayer90 in reply to digitalmentalist

I grew up near Long Island. I had a meeting months ago with a woman who recently moved into Great Neck, and she expressed how lonely she was because her neighbors rarely wanted to meet, come over, etc. Sad state of things. She spent a lot of her time painting.

Lazy_dog_lover profile image
Lazy_dog_lover in reply to digitalmentalist

May 17 at Patchogue Theater for the Performing Arts. Gloria Gaynor Night of Disco.

swimmingupstream profile image
swimmingupstream

I found meditation helpful to help me calm down from my anxiety. The app is called Smiling mind. I tried meditation in the past no luck I got to hung up on thoughts while trying. This is normal I found out.

digitalmentalist profile image
digitalmentalist

Meditation does not work for me because my mind races.

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