Anyone ever have weird, masochistic desires to relive painful memories?

[MichiganBoy]

Hey guys, I'm new here and my first few posts all related to me working through a pretty rough period in my life. Things are still tough, but I think I'm out of the "bad place", so to speak, for now. Things still hurt inside, but I can genuinely smile again, so I'm happy to say this is a more lighthearted post.

Anyone ever get the urge to immerse yourself in memories you know are going to make you sad? I'm still pining over my ex, and for some reason I was struck by the desire to pull up audio of the outdoors because there was a lake near her house and you could always hear frogs and crickets and animals super loud at night. I'm sitting here, feeling like I've got a knife in my chest, and I was just struck by how bizarre it is that I'm doing this to myself. It struck me as pretty funny, so I thought I'd share.

I have no idea what compels me to rub salt into my own wounds every so often, but if anyone else does this, know that you're not alone.

[Hidden]

I do the exact same thing, I dont know why either. But you are not alone and I pray it gets better for you💕

[Hidden]

Not really