Loneliness & Grad School

[ShellofMyself]

I guess that the title is pretty self-explanatory. I've been in grad school since January 2017 after having been away from the student side of academia (I was an ESL teacher in South Korea for several years). I have been able to maintain an excellent GPA since the start, but in order to accomplish the goal, I've sacrificed social aspects of life... For me, it has been studying and studying with very little time for anything else. I've always been rather quiet and shy... I try to be social during little events around the campus, but being a non-traditional student surrounded by so many that are younger than me...it just makes things hard. It's hard to relate to the younger students and even those who are fairly close to my age (I'm 45 y.o.). The places I have been, the things I have seen and done...most people where I live can't even fathom. Most of the time, when I speak, I feel like whatever I say is mostly shrugged off and I feel like an "alien." I think that is another reason I have tried to come online and express my thoughts. At least here, I may get replies from people who MAY understand or MAY care about what I say... Lord knows how I have been silent these days. I've just felt that it has been better to keep quiet than speak and no one really listening to what I have to say.

[Hidden]

Welcome and I just joined tonight as well! I definitely understand loneliness and understand seeing things in life that nobody else will understand what kind of effect it has on a person. Know that I am here if you need to talk because I too need someone to talk to at times like tonight.

[ShellofMyself in reply to Hidden]

Thanks. I really do appreciate the reply and the kind words.

[AZ1970]

I’m in graduate school myself. I understand about younger students. There is a generation gap. It sounds like you are craving social connections. I hope there is a way you can find something in your community to engage in. This is a good place to vent. I’m glad you are here.

[ShellofMyself in reply to AZ1970]

Thanks for the reply and the kind words. For me, it's not so much the generation gap that is an issue, it's more like being away from American culture and then moving to a place where everyone has known each other since they were born and for someone who moves in, making new friends is pretty hard. I guess I'll be relying a little more on whatever online support I get. Thanks again.

[Hidden]

I would love to hear what you are studying. What degree are you working towards?

[ShellofMyself in reply to Hidden]

Thanks for the reply. I'm currently working on a Masters in Liberal Arts with an emphasis in History. Lots and lots of reading and writing of reviews and papers. My thesis covers the Battle of Lake George during the French & Indian War and why the French lost this decisive battle. All in all, it's a great deal of reading and research...

[Hidden in reply to ShellofMyself]

Wow. It amazes me how specific some thesis are. Isn't it amazing though to get lost in research. I truly love to learn new things.

[ShellofMyself in reply to Hidden]

A lot of the time, I really enjoy getting lost in the research. It takes my mind off of a lot of the stresses. Thanks for the reply.

[purposelife]

I understand how hard it can be to establish friendship when you're in a new place. You could look into joining a local group with those you share interest with. Know that we value your thoughts and feelings here so feel free to chat anytime. Well wishes!

[ShellofMyself in reply to purposelife]

Yeah, it is really hard. I've been interested in a few activities, but time has been an issue: there's just not enough time. Thanks for your reply.