Hurt and alone

[JenGo]

Hello. My name is jen and I’ve been struggling with depression for years. I was happily married for 9 years to an amazing woman who was also my best friend. We have a child together whom I love with all of my heart. Over the last two years, my mother was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer and I moved her in with the blessing of my wife. My depression worsened and with it came the loss of my job and separation from my wife. We sold our house and I moved into a small 2 bd apartment with my mom. I have a decent job now but struggle with the bills and heartbreak of losing my love to another woman. Now my soon to be ex wife is denying me any contact with our daughter. I’m so alone but I’m hopeful. I am a good person who’s had a lot of terrible things happen all at the same time. Am I going to be okay? How do I get my life back? How do I make new friends? I’m so lost.

[Hidden]

Im sorry your going through this. I will say this you will be okay. It is temporary. You are in the middle of a bad storm. Eventually the sun will come out again. Hasn’t it before? You have been through so much? Have you ever had something terrible happen only to find out it that you made it ok. Hang on. Don’t give up. It’s great that you are hopeful and remember you are not alone!. You can join Meetup.com find friends with same interests in the community.

[JenGo in reply to Hidden]

Thank you so much for your reply. It helps to know that I’m not alone. Thank you

[fauxartist]

You are going to be okay Jen....and the heartache will get lesser ..... it's really hard on a relationship when you have another relative living with you, and your also suffering from this disease of depression. When my relationship of 15 years ended when I found out my ex- was sleeping with one of my so called friends for a year behind my back, and these so called friends knew about it....well.....I was destroyed with grief. The saving grace was we didn't have kids. I'm sorry your going through this ..... and will tell you it's going to take some time. But after being stuck with grief for a while, I had decided to get help....I too suffer from depression and it just makes everything so much harder. But I found a therapist who got me into a group for grief and loss and learning to let go. That with one on one therapy and getting on my SSRI low dose....I began to get passed this a bit at a time.....I did find new friends.....but mostly I found me, a happier me in the long run.

That was over 10 years ago now and I am now with my partner who I love very much, and feel finally things in my life are getting better. Sure we have normal ups and downs, and they do understand my depression and abandonment issues to a certain extent....but I found being here on this site and openly expression what I feel and am going through helps a lot. I'm glad your sharing.