Honest

[melbrown]

Thank you so much everyone... yesterday was a struggle. Told my therapist about wanting to hurt myself. We got my husband on the phone, he now knows. It was difficult but necessary. She wanted me to do inpatient care.... but I am scared to. Giving to give out patient program a try, I meet with them Monday. Going back on Zoloft. I still scared, thoughts still there, but have my husband watching out. Going to my best friend's today... He doesn't know. He knows I'm in therapy & that's about it... Going to talk to him. Worried about that. So, that's where I'm at.... scared, but a little less alone.

[jkl5500]

It's very tough when you have frightening thoughts, but you're afraid to tell anyone because of "what they'll think". I'm not telling you what to do, but I have found that confiding in people I can trust helps a great deal.

[melbrown in reply to jkl5500]

💛 thank you. I did talk to my friend & his wife. It was difficult... but I got love & support. He's going to make a point of reaching out.

[Starrlight]

💕 💗 ❤️

[melbrown in reply to Starrlight]

Love you too Starrlight ❤

[Starrlight in reply to melbrown]

You made my day Melbrown!! Take care and know I am praying and rooting for ya!

[Hidden]

Hey Mel! I been thinking of you! I’m so sorry you’ve been feeling like this. You know I can relate so much! Please take care of yourself & allow your hubby to take care of you! We are all here for you always! Love you! <3

[melbrown in reply to Hidden]

Thank you sweetheart. ❤ I'm trying.... so scared... wondering if this pain will stop.... Love you too.

[Hidden]

Im glad your husband knows you need that extra support and someone who can be on the lookout and keep an eye on you 💜🌻

[melbrown in reply to Hidden]

Sending you so much love & hugs. ❤🌻

[Changeonthewind]

Look at all the positive steps you're taking! That's awesome. I'm proud of you and i'm sure a lot of people here are as well. There is nothing wrong with being afraid. If you are afraid to tell your friend how you've been feeling and you're worried about what they might think, it's because you care about them so much that their opinion is really important to you. We should should all be so lucky to have a friend like that. It's good you're making decisions about the kind of care you need. It's OK to be concerned about inpatient care, but rest assured that you will have the love and support of those around you should you go that route and you will be ok. I hope today goes better for you and again, we're all proud of you for taking these meaningful steps on your journey.

[melbrown in reply to Changeonthewind]

Hugs.... Thank you. My friend was very supportive, so is his wife. We're both bad at keeping touch, but he's going to make a point to do better. I stop being scared & worried.... want these thoughts to stop ... do they?

💛

[Hidden]

Hello melbrown!

Inpatient hospital stays have always helped me and were quite a wake-up call! It’s not easy and takes some adjustment, but if you’re focused on getting better, it can be very helpful! Get better!!! 🌺🙂🌺

[melbrown in reply to Hidden]

GratitudeFirst 💛 If it comes to it, I would go... I'm scared to... my therapist reassured me the ones the use are good. I like sleeping in my own bed with my husband & pup.... but I do want to get better. Thank you for your support, hugs.

[Hidden in reply to melbrown]

Not sleeping at home and experiencing discomfort are great motivators! 🙂

[Goldtop66]

I don't think inpatient is good. I think you would be better off with outpatient.

[melbrown in reply to Goldtop66]

I'm hoping it does, I want to go home to my own surroundings. But if I have to do inpatient I'll do it.

[shadow68]

1st of all welcome back to (normalcy)? and if your friend is expecting and willing to except you today should be a pretty good sign that you won't have alot to worry about. sounds to me like your friend excepts you just the way you are (probably) because you said yourself that he/she knows your in therapy. but have a good day anyway