Depressed!!!: Haven't felt this bad for... - Anxiety and Depre...

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Depressed!!!

lovedogs51511 profile image
13 Replies

Haven't felt this bad for awhile now but last week I've just been wanting to end it all!!! Hope it passes but not sure. Ever since I moved out of depressing WA state to las Vegas my depression was way better. Now in sunny Utah I'm usually alright. Just started on adderall and I know that's why I'm depressed. I'm feeling rage after taking it. It lasts all day until the pill wears off. Plus I'm super sleepy after taking it. I've got to get extended release tabs at a higher dose cause this 10 mg IR sucks. It's tough cause I really need this pill to work. Adhd is a pain to live with! Depressed mainly from having not a thing in life. Being sober has made life suck more everyday!! When drinking I never felt anxiety this bad!! Currently taking Propranylol for anxiety but not working. I'm still having hard time going outside!! Life sucks! There's nothing to live for. Hope you all have a great day. Sorry for being so negative its just been hard dealing with multiple illnesses!!!!

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lovedogs51511
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Shriendly profile image
Shriendly

Please hang in there! When I have felt this way (which is way more times than I care to count) I try to remember that there were some good times before the depression. and once the cloud lifts again ( and it will) there will be good times once more. I tell myself. “You have been here before and thought you couldn’t make it, but you did! You will again!”. I don’t know ; it works for me anyway. I hope you can work through this dark time and remember the light will come at some point. I’m sorry you are going through such s rough time. Take Care!

lovedogs51511 profile image
lovedogs51511 in reply to Shriendly

Thank you!! Yes I get these feelings more than I can count too! Gets old doesn't it? I never have good days which is hell but like you said if I've been here before and made it I guess I will again. Thanks for your kindness☺☺😊😊😄😄

CazO46 profile image
CazO46

Hi , sorry you are having such a tough time right now. I agree it can feel never ending and so tiring to deal with difficult emotions all the time. We are all here with you especially through the really hard times, you will be in my thoughts and hope you get some blue sky through these dark clouds xx

lovedogs51511 profile image
lovedogs51511 in reply to CazO46

Thank you caz! Yea I'm just tired of fighting multiple illnesses everyday. I wanted success in life but all this crap is keeping me sick and unable to work. Not happy and feeling so sad cause I haven't ever had a job long enough to buy anything. I'm only here to feel like crap. I really appreciate your kindness and support just like all the amazing ppl on here. This site is a lifesaver! Hope your day is good!

Oh I'm so so sad right now for you!!! I'm here for you...you know that right?? You need to come by & see me, hahahaha....little road trip!!! I love you bunches & bunches!!! XXX

lovedogs51511 profile image
lovedogs51511 in reply to

Hope it will get better but I'm so sick, weak and just tired of fighting these multiple illnesses. I know you'll be there lisa!!I just need time to try and understand how to survive these horrible feelings everyday. Having nothing all of my life just gets old and depressing. Sorry for sounding so negative but it is what it is. I'm just here to feel like dirt and that's it. I wish I could come see ya I probably would if I could of kept the car I had!! Love you lots!! Hope you have an awesome day!!!

in reply to lovedogs51511

Hoan in there......maybe a surprise is coming your way!!! I love you!!! XXX

Hello lovedogs!

I understand that not having anything in life is a miserable feeling. The positive aspects of your life should definitely include sobriety. Not to offend you, but it sounds like you’re living the life of a dry drunk 😵. You’re hopefully free of alcohol, but you haven’t worked any kind of program yet. Your “stinking thinking” remains unchecked and untouched. The intangibles of sobriety should be causing a feeling of serenity for you. I would think your chances of relapse are high. Please seek some kind of treatment for your alcoholism and begin to enjoy life again...this is available to all people! Wishing you the best !!

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight

Hey there lovely you. I feel for you and wish and pray that you will be experiencing hope that this will not last forever. You are so strong and I believe you will come out even stronger. (((((((((Hug))))))) I care about you so much. Thanks for being a beautiful friend!!! 💕 Keep in touch

lovedogs51511 profile image
lovedogs51511 in reply to Starrlight

Thing is I'm not strong. I feel so low and everyday turns out to be horrible like the last 45 years!!! I'm done trying to be strong enough to get thru this shit. I have way to many illnesses to deal with!! No one deserves to have this much crap done to them. My brother doesn't have anything I got it all so I know god hates me and is driving me to suicide!! I care a lot about you too but I just don't know if its worth going on tortured this way. I'm sorry Starr I just feel so weak and tired of fighting this day after day!!! Thank you starr 🌟 for being a wonderful beautiful friend!!!☺ Sorry for being depressed and negative😭

Starrlight profile image
Starrlight in reply to lovedogs51511

(((((((Gentle Hug))))))) I’m sorry you are in so much pain. I’m here for you.

Marshall64 profile image
Marshall64

Hopefully this latest bout of depression is temporary due to your body getting used to the new meds.

As far as not feeling this bad when you were drinking, are you sure about that? I used to be a weekend drinker and there were times when it wasn't all that great or I did something I later regretted. You have a lot of sobriety time which you should be proud of. Maybe you could use that experience to help others that are struggling with alcohol and that will make you feel better in the process.

Hope you start feeling better. 😊

lovedogs51511 profile image
lovedogs51511

Your probably right but my mom is someone that keeps me feeling horrible about having mental illness. I was a misetable drunk. No doubt about that but just miss not having anxiety like I do now that I'm sober. Drinking I didn't care what or how anyone thought!! Drinking and drugs made me feel pretty good but yes overall it was hell due to the daily cravings. Alcohol was the worse for me!!! Its like I don't want a drink just the effects like having no anxiety or care in the world. Man that would be sweet if I could a pill that gave me that feeling. Thanks for your message Marshall☺☺

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