scared of my own shadow

[Maya-]

It has been 4 months with constant anxiety attacks some days are good, others no much. I recognized that my main problem is fear of faulierto be rejected. You can say, use that as a motive. I did since my 15 years I have try to use it as my motive to keep fighting. But, there are times like now, when this motive plays against me. My fear is so big and uncontrollable that I start to demand too much of myself, nothing is enough and the negative thoughts overflows me . I didn't work hard enough, I shouldn't be wasting my time resting and so on. Until the point I stop doing any activitie, even those realeted with my work or personal life just because I afraid. Even common things like sending a email causes me stress and anxiety. I couldn't have express my feelings and thoughts to anyone in person, I'm just to afraid to be judged. It is funny but I feel safe writing what is in my main and how I feel. May be because i know we all have problems or maybe cuz I don't know you

Does anyone feel the same?

[Maggie1127]

I'm so sorry that you are suffering this way, Maya. When I started having panic attacks and anxiety attacks 15 years ago, I felt much the same way. I do hope you can find some trusted friends and family members to confide in. Doing so has helped me a lot. In fact, I found out that anxiety really runs in my family. At this point, all of my close friends and family members know that I have an anxiety disorder and I have leaned on them from time to time. Being able to be honest about how I am feeling is always a relief. I've also been to counseling, which has been a huge help. And I've found a medication that works for me. I know that medication is not an option that everyone is comfortable with--I wasn't at first. But it really helped me get my life back.