I thank everyone very much for their kindness. You have gotten me through the last two three days. You have been a lifeline. I appreciate your thoughtful suggestions and most importantly for sharing your experiences. Knowing that I am not alone means the world. An update on my situation: I saw my psychiatrist today. Besides the anxiety and panic disorder I relapsed back into a major depression. She adjusted my meds and added Rexulti. I am hoping that sun will shine sometime in the near future. I am desperate for even an inkling of joy, a little smile. Patience is key and it is most difficult when you’re suffering and all is dark. But I survived today. If I can survive each day, somehow, maybe I can make it. Thx for listening.