When to Withdraw?: What are your... - Anxiety and Depre...

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When to Withdraw?

SchuylerW profile image
14 Replies

What are your thoughts on dropping classes because of depression and anxiety? I love my Positive Psychology class (the irony), but the final project, which involves a 30-minute presentation has been completely overwhelming me. The project itself isn't even that difficult, but I already feel like the dumbest person in class and I hate the thought of having to speak in front of everyone alone for 30 minutes. I broke down crying during my 5-minute practice presentation last week and I haven't been able to fully collect myself since. I'm considering withdrawing from the class because this has truly been hell. I would hate giving up and feeling like a failure, but at this point, the beast just seems way too big to conquer. Please share your thoughts and experiences.

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SchuylerW
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14 Replies
jkl5500 profile image
jkl5500

You have to decide how well your illness is under control right now. Does your D & A have the upper hand at this time? Are you having trouble functioning in general? If yes, it might be good to give yourself a break, and retake the class when you're feeling a lot better.

I know you're torn about this, because you've done so much already, and you'll feel like you gave in. But your retreat would only be temporary. Get yourself together, and you'll come back stronger than ever, and much more confident.

I've dropped classes due to illness, if it makes you feel any better. (This was a long time ago!)

SchuylerW profile image
SchuylerW in reply to jkl5500

Thank you for your response. I'm having such a hard time with this because I'm generally a very good student. This semester it feels like I have the knowledge to do what I need to do, but my anxiety and depression have just been completely getting in my way. I stay in bed all day and completely break down when I confront any of my responsibilities or problems.

jkl5500 profile image
jkl5500 in reply to SchuylerW

I'm not a doctor, but it sounds like you need to get this under control now. That's Job #1. Get yourself straightened out first with the right meds. Then you can concern yourself with your goals in life. You're not going very far if you can't get out of bed!

Please see your doctor ASAP. You have an entire lifetime to get everything else done.

SchuylerW profile image
SchuylerW in reply to jkl5500

I have been working with a therapist and psychiatrist, but I'm not quite on track yet. I think I'm having such a hard time because everyone around me thinks I'm "fine." For the first time in my life, I'm really addressing my mental health issues and it's been incredibly painful and scary. I don't appear "crazy" to others and that makes me doubt how sick I really am. I worry that I'm just lazy and I'm making up excuses. I have no gauge for what "normal" functioning is. Thank you for acknowledging that my concerns and struggles are real.

jkl5500 profile image
jkl5500 in reply to SchuylerW

I have suffered D & A for over 40 years. I know every symptom there is. When you can't get out of bed, that's real enough for me.

No, you're not faking it, or being lazy. Who would choose to behave or feel this way?You don't have to be a raving lunatic to be ill. Just get the help you need, and don't worry about "deserving" it.

SchuylerW profile image
SchuylerW in reply to jkl5500

You really hit the nail on the head with the "deserving" part. It was really hard for me to start accepting help because I always thought I wasn't sad enough to have depression or stressed enough to have anxiety. It's so silly because as a psych major, I recognize that every type of mental illness, no matter how mild or severe, deserves to be treated, but I have such a hard time convincing myself that something really is wrong.

jkl5500 profile image
jkl5500 in reply to SchuylerW

I hope this talk clears up any doubts you may have had. I wish you all the best for your future.

HearYou profile image
HearYou in reply to SchuylerW

Is it possible for you to get a continuation of your class, so that you don' t lose your credit for the work you've already done? The continuation may be for a few weeks with only a few students invited to attend, or for half a semester.

I had to do that twice while in university. Am so sorry you are going through this at the moment.

Others are addressing your health and anxiety issue, so thought I may be able to suggest an alternative to dropping the class. If this is possible, you might be able to "stack" the small audience with your friends. :)

Speaking in front of people is one of the top fears and anxiety for most people. Has been for generations. If you decide to postpone the class presentation, just remember an audience usually wants the speaker to succeed. :)

SchuylerW profile image
SchuylerW

I'm going to email my professor. She is super understanding (and she is also my advisor), but I fear that she'll think I'm lazy or making up excuses. I'm not trying to get out easy. I'm just trying to get out alive.

HearYou profile image
HearYou in reply to SchuylerW

Well, if you consult with your doctor and he/she writes a brief explanation of your current health conditions that should erase your and your professor's possible thought that any fictitious excuse or laziness on your part. xx

Hey! I have a crippling fear of public speaking so I know what you mean! I have just recently talking in my class discussions, but when I had to give presentations it was HORRIBLE. I did drop classes because of it, but there was a time when I just forced myself to do it. And it was not fun! I cannot say to just do it and face your fear, because sometimes it is not that easy. Don't be too hard on yourself either. Everyone has different strengths and weaknesses. Have you tried talking to your teacher about it? Sometimes they are very accommodating. Keep us posted, and good luck!

vsskgm profile image
vsskgm

As someone who went through very similar experiences in college and proceeded to withdraw from several classes and eventual drop out, I feel obligated to share with you the fact that it's been almost a decade since I dropped out, and I'm still dealing with the same depression/anxiety issues, and I regret every day my decision to drop out of school. Not only am I depressed and broke, but I feel like I'll never go back to school and never make my life better. Stay in school--prevent horrible run-on sentences, lol... Also, quitting, giving in, giving up... this will just decrease your self-esteem and make you feel worse. Finish your project, pass your class, stay in school. Life is supposed to be hard. It may start out as just dropping one class, but it's a slippery slope... I'm not saying that you should be unnecessarily hard on yourself, but it sounds like you're already doing that in a different way. You say you feel like the dumbest person in class, but I'm sure that's not true. You need to keep reminding yourself of that by doing things like finishing this assignment. You can do it. Take a break, stretch, breathe, have some tea, listen to music, but then after you feel like you can face the assignment again, get back to it with confidence. You are smart and capable. It is your anxiety/depression that is telling you otherwise, and the best way to beat it is to prove it wrong. That's my two cents. Best hopes for you.

SchuylerW profile image
SchuylerW

I'm not considering dropping out completely. I've really been battling my mental health issues this semester and I just don't think I can get through this class without completely losing it. I haven't withdrawn yet, but I think just dropping this class might be the healthiest choice.

SchuylerW profile image
SchuylerW

Update: If I drop this course, I will lose a $2000 grant, which my parents will have to pay back within the next week. That is totally impossible for my family, so I'm going to take a D or F. I have nothing left. No one seems to understand that I have reached my threshold and expended all energy and resources.

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