Anxiety and Depression Support

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Overloaded and Anxious

Had a super rough day

For the past few weeks – the pressure has been piling on at work. I have a list of priorities for the week – with timelines attached to them. First off- the list is pretty hefty, and more than I think I can manage in one week. Then on top of that, there are ‘urgent’ requests that need to be turned around within 24 hours that are piled on top. It was getting a bit much, and I was starting to get headaches and dizziness just through feeling anxious. My housemate encouraged me to talk to my manager about it – because if they don’t know if there is a problem, they wont do anything to solve it.

It took a bit of working myself up to get the courage to do this, but today I decided I would talk to my boss about it. Needless to say it didn’t go so well. I explained why I am finding my task list difficult to manage, and her response was but you’re getting everything done. And I told her, only because I am working over time and skipping lunch. She just said, all I need to know is that you’re going to get it done – I can’t be worried about anything else.

So yeah, I get it, that’s how work can be, its kind of a turn around from how it was when I came back from sick leave but I understand – we all have our roles to play in the team. I just can’t cope with it right now. When I reached out to my dad, he told me, ‘well just don’t get anxious about it’, my best friend wasn’t much better - he said ‘maybe you should just leave the job instead of having sporadic good days’. Not going to lie, I kind of feel like a popped balloon. I feel like the steps I’m taking aren’t enough. I feel like I’m not getting well fast enough. I feel like I total burden to the lives of my loved ones. Most of all, I just feel isolated. I don’t want to be anxious or depressed, but it seems like my go-to people think this is some kind of choice.

18 Replies

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okay, I hear a lot of what's going on at work your kinda doing with your personal life feelings too...one thing at a time, don't pile everything on all at once....go back to your boss, and let her know you have to have time for lunch, so she can find someone to work during your lunch time if she wants to keep up the quota she gave you, that's your right to do that, and I hope your getting paid over time. It's against the law for an employee to work through lunch, or do overtime without compensation, depending on how many hours a week or day you work, it's in your contract with your work. Second, sometimes friends tell us the easiest solution, quitting your job may not be such a good idea, and as far as your family goes, just say, 'hey, I just need some understanding and need to just vent a little, I can't help the anxiety I'm going through'. But from what I'm reading, your job is stressing you out, your making your company money by doing more work than maybe you should have to so they don't have to hire someone else to balance the work load. So you have choices to make. Take care of yourself, and don't take on board anybody else's crap, you deserve to be treated with respect.

Thank you!! Definitely going to be more structured in the way i approach this and try not to let my emotions get tangled up in it. My contract states that reasonable overtime is expected - of course they don't quantify that. We have a lot of holes in our team - the work has been redistributed because the 3 missing team members will not be replaced. Hopefully once I feel a bit better i can think about it more clearly.

no matter what the contract says...overtime is the law. And of course the law says you have to have breaks, so if you give them up for your boss, she is breaking the law. That simple. But you can just keep that info in your back pocket, and approach them with the old...'I want to keep doing quality work as I always have been, but need my breaks to recharge my battery's, and that if I at least had a part time helper I can keep up with the work load demands......how ever your comfortable with talking to them, always let them think your only thinking of the good of the production, which truthfully you do want to do a good job, but not give up your rights as an employee either, cause they don't care.

You're right - and the more I don't stand up for myself, the more she is going to push for things. I've emailed her today for the sake of a paper trail suggesting how we could better manage the work load and make sure that we're not putting in excessive over time to meet our commitments. Fingers crossed! Thank you so much

Hey.

I dont know what sort of work youre company does. I have been in a similar situation. if your bosses attitude is like what you said, do any other employees have the same issues with the management? Have you spoken to any of them? Do you share the same opinions? Are you all overworked? Is everyones workload equal?

It happens so often in companies, you get people who do alot and people who get away with doing very little. It sounds like you are the first of these two categories and unfortunately if you are good at your job and you get things done you will be always expected to maintain that speed of work and you will also have to pick up other peoples slack to keep things on schedule.

Do you feel you are being unfairly treated? Im a marine engineer for a well known production company. I was poorly paid from day one and in the summer things got incredibly hectic we as a team of 15 worked 10hours a day 5 days a week. Poor management was too blame and a blind management at that, people picked and choose what jobs they would take on. I found it hard to get myself noticed, I was one of those people who got all things asked for done and I still am. I have three years experience now and I have made it to the top, I have taken over the distribution of work, and you know what? the people who got away with next to nothing are now pulling their weight, granted im still poorly paid but the work load is now more evenly passed around and you can see that everyone is a lot happier within their jobs and stress levels are at an all-time low.

I dont know if this helped at all but it was as much a therapy for me as I hope it will be of help to you. But for goodness sake dont beat yourself up about it! It is not your fault and you need to take some action! Do you think you could improve anything within your company and its workings? If you have ideas put them too your boss!

Chris

Hi Chirs,

thanks for your reply. The feeling in my team is that we are all quite overloaded. Over the past 12 months, we have lost 3 team members since they have left the company. Instead of rehiring, the work has been redistributed onto the remaining members of the team. For a time we were managing okay - but unfortunately we're all very junior and working with other teams can be a challenge because requests come from more senior people.

I actually really like my boss as a person, and I know she is under pressure too -so i am conscious of adding to it. I've suggested how I believe we could better manage some projects and come up with a couple of sheets and reference points to try and make it easier. It backfired a little bit because now i am being asked to co-ordinate a lot of team projects. I take it as a compliment because i guess they wouldn't ask me unless i was doing something right - but the volume of work is really rather difficult, and short of getting into some bad habits like taking my laptop home and working over the weekend I have no idea how to get everything done.

Your response was super helpful to me. Thank you so much for taking the time to share your experience with me

Thank you for taking the time to reply! 😁

What a bitch she sounds, go on sick for 2 weeks, then tell her - just get it done xx she may realise then the workload impossible, remember if u don't meet targets, deadlines it down to her to explain, that's why bosses deligate arrgh.

She is really lovely as a person. I think she is likely very stressed right now too. But then I feel like in order to avoid me actually having to go out sick - maybe we could manage issues a little better once they're raised? And if there is just too much on too few people - maybe they can hire a temp to help with the less technical stuff. But - let me whole heartedly echo the argh!!

I just don't get some people they got the nerve to say it's all in your head or get over it, or just take deep breaths or whatever, these individuals don't have a clue of what we are going through, I hope hope they never have to go through what we are going through !!!

I know - and i don't want to push anyone away by saying 'that's not helpful' but sometimes I kind of feel like that's my cut off point. Someone says 'just think positive' and I feel like the conversation is over, anything I say from that point on just feels like I'm whining or burdening them.

People don't know how we feel it's unfortunate what we have to go through and a lot of people don't understand and even family

Yeah - you're right. And unfortunately there is still a lot of stigma and misconception out there. A lot of people I know make some horrible jokes about depression, sometimes even about things like self harm and suicide. When I point out that it's not something to make jokes out of I get the old, 'oh you know we're only joking' - i find it bizarre and alienating that I am the weird one for not laughing about it. (Sorry, sorry, i Just had to rant and let that out to an audience that might judge me a little less)

1 out 4 in united states have some kind of mental issues so it's not something to be joking about I'm not ashame that my body is going through its just the way it is I just waiting to get better and for the meantime I'm just doing my best to deal with it, and I'm not going to lie it's though, but it's ok there's nothing I can do but wait to get better

Glad we're on the same page

The doctors office I go to has a picture of Janet Jackson and other celebrities and I ask about why those pictures are there she said they have mental illness also, so It doesn't matter who you are rich or poor any can get mental illness especially the ones that makes joke about it and think we are we are crazy they better be careful of what they say they too can can get it

It's true - thank you so much

I totally get how you're feeling, the headaches and I get the dizzy feeling too when I start to get overwhelmed. I will fantasize about jumping up and running out from work. Family doesn't get it. They will ask why I am stressed or anxious, like I can control it. Yeah, sure, just don't be anxious 🤔👌 Thank you for sharing.