New and need help

[Anxiousjy]

Hi everyone, I’m 27 Female with two beautiful kids and a loving husband. They are my world. Diagnosed with GAD but I think I have OCD too. I feel everyday that im gonna lose my mind and end up hurting my kids. Which sends my anxiety through the roof. I also have derealization, like I don’t recognize my family anymore or my life. Irrational fears such as i’ve done something wrong. Or Im already crazy and I just don’t have an idea. I’m so scared all the time. I have this painful feeling in my chest. I feel like I’m sinking. My thoughts are so scary and dark, and to make things worse, I have music looping inside my head. (Not I don’t Actually hear it) I also have health anxiety, and I also worry about being schizoprenic, bipolar or psychotic. I don’t want to lose my family, I just wanna be normal again. I want peace of mind.

[Hidden]

I have had anxiety for as long as I can remember. I also have worried about having other disorders, but I decided to research them so I knew more about what could be happening. If you have the ability to see a counselor I would recommend doing that. The counselor will listen and (depending on where you live) possibly give you a definitive diagnosis. Counselor rights are different depending on the state they practice in, some states allow them to diagnose and others do not. Something that helps me a lot is journaling. It doesn't even have to be pen to paper, I type my journal entries on my laptop. There are a lot of apps you can download on your phone to help you cope and track your mood/symptoms. I hope you find something that helps, I know how much it sucks to feel as though you could fall apart at any moment.

[Anxiousjy in reply to Hidden]

Hi! Thanks for responding. I’ve actually sought help from my psychiatrist and he dismissed other mental illness. He said that it’s just anxiety.

[Anxiousjy in reply to Hidden]

But you know, people like us who have anxiety tend to overthink a lot. I didn’t believe him that it was only anxiety. All the physical and mental symptoms, dizziness, headaches, palpitations.

[Cherbear811 in reply to Anxiousjy]

I have those symptoms plus exhaustion, pins and needles in my hands,arms,head and sometimes zaps that feel cold in my head, forehead, and anywhere else in my body. I have muscle twitching and my left calf muscle is rock hard, not like a Charlie horse just hard and painful. I barely remember what it was like to have normal thought process and not feel scared all day. Do you have any of those symptoms too?

[Anxiousjy in reply to Cherbear811]

Omg. You sound exactly like me. The brain zaps were the worst. I would always think that It was an aneurysm.

[Natsteveo]

Hi honey Anxiousjy

Wow you sound like me the way you describe what your going through I was that bad I used to handcuff myself to my headboard because I was absolutely petrified I would hurt one of my loved ones without me knowing or realising I was doing it...it's absolutely scary to feel like that are you on meds at all...I found out it was the side effect from the anti depressants I was on jeeze it was horrific I totally know how you feel about feeling detached from everyone and you feel your losing the plot you feel so alone...this will eventually get better I have terrible health anxiety every pain I get I automatically think I've got the big c or something life threatening it's horrible to live with if you arnt on meds then maybe you should go see a doctor and have a talk to them tell them how you are feeling

Here if needed

Nat

[Anxiousjy in reply to Natsteveo]

Yes. You sound exactly like me. I’ce had countless trips to the E.R. I’ve went to different doctors to have my physical symptoms diagnosed. A simple headache to me means I have a brain tumor or aneurysm. Now my health anxiety is focused on mental health,

[tashalyn]

My heart goes out to you. This is my life story narrated by you. As if the hurt ocd isn’t bad enough we have to deal with derealization. All I can tell you is take it one day at a time, get plenty of sleep that’s really essential, and I know you know this but I will reassure you again YOU WONT hurt your loved ones

[Anxiousjy in reply to tashalyn]

Thank you, it’s really calming to know that I am not alone. I wouldn’t wish this to happen even on my worst enemy. I really admire the strength and courage of people who are going through this. Everyday is a battle. I think all I need to know is that I am not losing my mind. My psychiatrist have been assuring me that I am not, but it’s really hard to convince myself.

[tashalyn in reply to Anxiousjy]

Yes everyday is a battle, when I go through such intense periods I take everyday one day at a time, I switch to survival mode, and make the target of my day is getting through the day. Don’t give into compulsions of hiding sharp objects or anything like that, it will just make everything worse. I wish I can help you more but my heart totally goes out to you.

[Anxiousjy in reply to tashalyn]

Yes, I don’t do compulsion. Message me if you need someone to talk too. 😊

[Natsteveo]

You always get that o e second you stare into space and think just for that second "im losing the plot but honestly we never do it just feels like we are because of the absolutely awful symptoms we go through and what's worse to me is the physical feelings the amount of physical symptoms you can experience is just absurd so I always wonder why im getting these physical symptoms there must be something wrong and my body is telling my mind theres something dreadfully wrong when 9/10 their isn't it's just us feeding our anxiety..it's absolutely scary I tell my husband it's like your worse nightmare being lived everyday

Here if you need to talk

Nat x

[Anxiousjy in reply to Natsteveo]

Yes. Everyday is a battle. Like I could lose control anytime. Sucks but I’m slowly getting used to the feeling. I don’t know if that’s a good thing or a bad thingz

[Cherbear811]

I have all those worries as well

[Anxiousjy in reply to Cherbear811]

Replied to your post ❤️