Hopeless.

[Lizanimal]

I have nobody who can understand. Lately I haven't even wanted to talk with my husband and mom because I find it so unhelpful and Im tired of being invalidated, told Im overreacting or dramatic and misunderstood in general. I have a therapist but so what? For an hour once a week someone listens and thats all the understanding that I get in this life. In a couple of months I will no longer be able to afford her anyways. I have no friends, looking through facebook and wondering why Im not good enough for my friends to even pretend to care about me nobody ever texts or messages, they only like pictures of my pets or my husband. I am so unhappy and Nobody cares at all and I have had anxiety and depression my entire life and it's such a waste.

[Hidden]

What have you done to help yourself?

[Lizanimal in reply to Hidden]

I have been in therapy for 12 years, have countless self help books, applied strategies for coping, reached out when I have been chronically suicidal and tried to be understanding when I have been continuously disregarded, reached out through forums, support groups etc. Is that enough?

[Lizanimal in reply to Hidden]

Is there something I haven't done to show others that I am worthy of their empathy?

[Lizanimal]

I have done my best to support my husband, who in turn tells me he cant deal with me and blames me for his lack of motivation/drive. I have done my best and wonder why on a post where I am reaching out am being questioned like I am guilty of something.

[Hidden in reply to Lizanimal]

On what post are you being questioned like you are guilty of something?

[Lizanimal]

I have also been very loyal to my friend's and available constantly for support, which I have given, and been thrown away.

[Lizanimal]

Im just wondering why I am being questioned as if I've done something wrong. I've been a there for my friends to vent to, to cry to and in return I get nothing, no support no friendship nothing.

[Lostjoy]

I feel a lot like you do. I think the thing is that the ones who don't suffer from what you do don't understand. I want to talk about what I'm feeling to my family and friends, but they aren't feeling what I am, so they want to talk about other things if they want to talk at all. I did therapy some also, but I didn't even feel like any of the therapists I saw was even really interested. Most of them are just there for the money. It's their job.

Support here is pretty good. And honestly I don't think anyone understands that even just getting a text from the people we love makes us feel a sense of self worth. It's the anxiety and depression that makes us feel deserted. I fight it every day.

[Soccer-mom]

Your life isn't a waste! Never think that. I have depression and anxiety I know how hard it is, but just know your not alone. This site is here to help, people without depression and anxiety have no idea how hard it is. I'm here if you need someone to talk to

[Lizanimal in reply to Soccer-mom]

Thank you

[Taaajaca4]

I feel like I could have written your post. I'm sorry you feel like that. I hate when anyone else feels like I do inside. I don't want anyone to feel this awful. I have lost every friend I have. I don't know if it is because I don't reach out or if my anxiety and depression are just too much for all of them. It sucks. But I hope for you it gets better.

[noname2]

Hi. I'm new to the group. You are not alone. There are people who "feel" just like you and I am one of them. "Feel" because folks like us don't feel anything worth feeling. I don't feel anything.just a hole where my life should be. Some days are better than others. The only thing that keeps me going sometimes is knowing that there are other people out there like me. My husband and mother don't understand me either. I don't want to burden them either.I don't want to do bring them down with me.

Are you on meds? A year ago I was taken to the hospital in an ambulance because I told my doctor I was suicidal. She changed my meds and boy what a difference. I've been on meds for over 20 years. Every so often they need to be changed or increased. Without meds I would surely be dead.

I hope you find some peace within this group. That's all I'm looking for.

[mysmugcat]

Yes I understand. Lately I think who cares though I do to an extent. I live alone now with a cat my partner died four months ago. So I must fight for myself with a little family help now and again. I really know who my friends are now and people who cannot be do relied upon. In times of crisis it is very interesting. Pm anytime.