Confused and scare and really lonely

For the past 5 months I have been feeling this weird feeling of being scared... I have been in and out hospitals and so far I have received nothing in return ... to them I am this healthy young girl who is just going threw anxiety .... it has gotten to a point were I get muscle jerks through out a whole day where ever ... I can't sleep well ... I am not myself ... I just gave up on school because everything was just to much and decided to give my self a brake not only that but I just moved in with my boyfriend and it's a weird feeling I miss my family my brother is l getting him self into so much trouble and I feel like it's all my fault because I left ... I start arguments with my boyfriend for no reason ... I'm tired throughout the whole day because I barely get any sleep at night I'm so depressed I don't know what to do Anxiety isn't even the word no more I need help

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  • How long have you been with your boyfriend? How long have you two been living together now? Have you talked to him about how you have been feeling?

  • It's been 6 months now .. I tell him everything but I don't think he understands he says something like .. "it's all in your head" "just relax" everything will be fine but nothing is going well.. just last month I went to a sleeping center to get a sleeping test done .. they make me wait a whole month for an appointment when I get there the office was closed .. later on that day I recicved a call saying My appointment is canceled to come in the next day at 8pm and so I did.. when I show up the nurse explains to me how I missed my appointment when clearly I was there but their office was closed ... I cried in front of this nurse because I had waited a whole month for this appointment and my boyfriend talked to them how wrong it was for them to set their patients up like that .. the nurse promises to put me in a week later ... a day before ... a reception calls me to tell me that I should find another doctor because they don't accept my incsurance and named a whole list of insurance they no longer take ... and hangs up .. no referal... no payments plan options just hangs up and makes me feel like I'm alone in this ... I get panic attacks I have this huge FEAR and I don't understand why ... I should be happy I'm young .. I'm only 18 ... but I feel like I have a mind of a 98 year old ..

  • I am 24 years old. I have been struggling with both depression and anxiety for about 14 years now. I understand the fear that you are experiencing. Doing anything is hard enough as is when you are living with anxiety and depression that when people who are supposed to be helping you leave you feeling helpless, I know how hard it can be to get up and try again. I am sorry that you had such an experience with that particular doctor, but don't give up hope. Is there a way you can look for information from you insurance to see what doctors there are in your area you could see for this issue?

  • Hey there, depression and anxiety are extremely difficult to explain unless the person has been through it. I first went into the hospital when I was 18. It is hard but I am still here 30 years later. I never would have guessed.

    I noticed a few things in your post...the first is your boyfriend. It sounds like he doesn't understand how it feels. I had very aggressive cancer two years ago and it was so much easier dealing with that then dealing with depression. I have had some success with finding the right group for myself and a group for spouses/partners/family through NAMI. They are EXTREMELY helpful and can point you in the right direction..

    The second is about the sleep clinic. I just had a take home sleep study through my hospital/neurologist. Again, it is so hard for someone to understand what this is like. Try your primary MD, psychiatrist, neurologist,... someone out there can help. Also, call your insurance company and ask them for the list of providers. It's probably a good thing the crappy sleep clinic didn't take you since you would probably have gotten crappy care.

    Take care of yourself. You are not alone.

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