I'm a 25 year old female working in the nonstop city of New York. It's pretty ironic that I work with people who suffer from chronic diseases & mental illnesses & here I am suffering from one myself. I'm one of those people who smiles & laughs at everything but yet deep down I feel empty.
I constantly feel like something's missing. Ever since 2015 I've started suffering from Depression & Anxiety. I can't be in crowded areas or around too many people, I start sweating & feeling sick. I started going out less & less. I rather be home with my books & reading than going out or even having people over. Majority of the time I rather sleep so my day can go quicker. When my depression kicks in I'm just to myself, I don't want to talk & I just want to cry all the time.
It definitely has been taking it's toll on my relationship. I've been with my boyfriend for 5 years & he's definitely noticed the change. He honestly doesn't even know how to handle it. As much as he says he tries & he can handle I know he can't. I know it affects him the way it does me. I feel like the only thing keeping us together is that we worked so hard to be together before my anxiety & depression & we love each other soooo much. But how much love can keep people together? I'm scared that everyday might be our last together.
It's hard & everyday it gets harder for me. I honestly don't even know what to do anymore.