I went to therapy today and the moment I walked in I started crying and spent the entire hour crying. I can't cry anywhere else. I'm afraid to cry by myself because i might fall into a big black hole. I know that's irrational but I still am deathly afraid. I can't cry with anyone else because I'm afraid I'll drag them under with me. My therapist called my psychiatrist and he was able to bump my medication review appointment from mid-May to this coming Monday. Trying to focus on what I am accomplishing instead of the million and one things I'm not getting done.
Having a Safe Place to Cry: I went to... - Anxiety and Depre...
Having a Safe Place to Cry
I did the same the last week. The minute I walked in and he asked " so how have you been?" I started bawling. He was actually shocked. He said "'wow I been seeing you for 6 weeks and this is the first time you showed emotion" I was a mess. Felt good too.
Please just keep moving forward! I know how difficult it can be to tell yourself exactly what a therapist would to keep your chin up and actually believe it. I'm accepting(slowly) this is the disease and seeing yours and others stories were a great reminder I'm not alone as you're not alone either. I personally struggle with my own irrational fears so your description of falling into a black hole hit home with me. I cry all the time and I can't stand it and lately Ive been throwing myself into full blown panic attacks because I believe the world(mine at least) is going to end if I don't stop and the harder I try to get a grip the harder it is to actually ground myself. I hope your appointment can provide you with some much needed answers and with support in place there's not a thing you couldn't achieve
Dpeterson, I'm glad you have a safe place to cry. It's very important . You trust your therapist. You will gradually feel comfortable to cry in front of others, and know you are not dragging them down. I'm a cryer, although there are people I don't cry in front of. Keep up the work with your therapist. God Bless
LD