It’s ok not to be ok..: In a last few... - Talk ED (eating d...

Talk ED (eating disorders)

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It’s ok not to be ok..

agama profile image
8 Replies

In a last few days,more than a week..I have lost my taste, desire to eat..the process of chewing and any food in me scare me,makes me feel ill..it’s not like I’m ill, it’s just I can’t make myself to force anything down..blueberries are the safe food, the texture and the shape are ok, they don’t make me feel anxious..Things has gone down the hill weight wise but I’m still managing to maintain my job. I wish I could find explanation to this behaviour...anyone experienced this?? How did you overcome the fear of unknown ..the fear of the whole process: eating chewing and having some things inside body ...now shire which direction I’m going but every day I’m saying tomorrow is a better day but is it really...feeling really low today ..sorry just want to vent ..

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agama profile image
agama
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8 Replies
tashakend profile image
tashakend

I am not totally in the same situation but i understand your feelings. I am currently struggling to eat anything but mine is related to stress. I have an ED, but mine can sway from restriction to eating better but purging alot. At the moment it makes me feel sick just to put something small in my mouth and chew on it but when i start to feel unwell i know i need some form of sugar so its required but then can make me very emotional. When i have food in my food its like my body is screaming for it to come out and it feels horrible it even being there, its hard but each day is a new day and try not to be too hard on yourself, you are trying your best. Are you getting enough support?

agama profile image
agama in reply to tashakend

Thank you for the support and understanding...I don’t have any support..I’m waiting to see me GP , app in a few weeks ..just don’t see the point of this .. everything is so blurry ..not sure what is best . Hope u well xx

tashakend profile image
tashakend in reply to agama

Have you had your GP appointment yet? Trust me support is hard to ask for but it does help xx I'm struggling at the moment, I went away on holiday which was relaxing and lovely but as I relaxed and left alot of crap behind and tried to eat more, after a few days it triggered my purging and I haven't been able to stop since. :(

You are seriously ill and should be in hospital where you would have to eat, it is only due to you being an adult that you are left to go downhill like this

Go to your GP and get help , you can't do this on your own , do you have anyone around to help you ?

If you can't get a GP appointment you should go to the nearest A &E dept and say you feel very very ill

You are not OK and it is not OK to carry on as you are the demon anorexia is tricking you into killing yourself and telling you it is OK to be not OK

Doesn't anyone at your workplace show any concern ?

Go to A& E now

agama profile image
agama in reply to lillyofthevalley37

Thank you for your support and being here. I’m waiting for appointment with my GP, I have one in few weeks time. Few days ago I wanted to change ..but now I don’t know what is best..everything is like a blurry picture..Work? Is going ok, I’m less productive and people have noticed my weight loss ..do they comment??to be honest I don’t pay attention as I’m in my own bubble most of the time ...it’s like a being in a loop of your own thoughts and nothing makes sense. But then I’m home and I get this extra energy to just walk off the bad thoughts in my head.. I will get there eventually, just sometimes feels too much .. Hope u ok xx

Suggest you should visit your GP and explain the situation - you need to get urgent help as it could be extremely serious for your health if you continue on this path.

agama profile image
agama in reply to crazycrossstitcher

I’m waiting for an appointment. Just feels so pointless and blurry ..I don’t know what is best ..I don’t know which way to go.. one day I’m happy I’m this way and then I’m falling down on my face why this is me .. I’m just confused x

Another thing - you can function without anorexia but Ana has told you you are nothing without her - all lies so she can control you and push you to your death

It would take a long time to find your real self again but it can be done but right now you don't believe that

I read about someone who made a recovery from praying to Jesus they said Ana was scared of Jesus and she held on to Jesus to keep Ana away - if you are Christian you should pray to Jesus surely it's worth a try

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