I’ve decided to recover.: Dear friends... - Talk ED (eating d...

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I’ve decided to recover.

sliverofsilver profile image
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Dear friends,

I’ve decided to recover from anorexia.

I didn’t want to before, but seeing my friends today made me realise just how much this evil illness is making me miss out on.

I was about to be admitted, put into hospital this very afternoon. I was going to be put on a drip. Tube-fed. And it was going to begin today. But then before that, right before, I saw my friends. I was allowed into school just to see them. And as soon as I walked in the door, a crowd of people gathered around me, saying my name, expressing how happy they were to see me. And over half of them don’t even know I have anorexia. They just thought I was physically ill for ages.

After talking with my school counsellor today, I’ve realised what I’m missing out on. There won’t be anything for the teachers to assess me on for my report. There’ll be inside jokes that I won’t know about. There’ll be outings, fun trips, that I can’t go on. I’ll be stuck with anorexia, the evil that drives my every action. Anorexia is just slow suicide. And that’s not what I want anymore.

Sure, right now, all of me is screaming at me not to eat the cucumber slice in front of me. But wait. I just ate it. Yep. The first thing inside me for ages. I did it. From now, I’m going to recover. Please, if you can, support me with this and remind me of why I chose this path when I grow doubtful.

-sliverofsilver

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sliverofsilver
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Jots1234 profile image
Jots1234

Well done, I'm super proud of you and praying for a full recovery for you. You are right, it's an evil illness and if you can recover from it now it will save you years of misery and missing out on life. I've struggled on and off for over 30 years and your post has inspired me xx

Each step you take is positive. Every day is a new beginning, treat it that way, don't beat yourself up when things don't go to plan, look forward and do the next right step and you'll keep going. When you feel like giving up, take a look at how far you've come. Journal if you can, it's great to look back and see how much progress you'll make. You've taken the biggest step by choosing to recover and not let it destroy you. You are therefore very strong, keep going, life has so much in store for you xxxx

joanna21 profile image
joanna21

Well done , you have taken the first step in a long hard road to recovery but IT IS WORTH IT. Please keep telling yourself that when you are struggling. You will need support from family & friends.Ask them to read up on anorexia so they can try to have some understanding what you are going through & how they can support you. Our daughter is 18 & still recovering from anorexia which she was diagnosed with at 15 but she is doing well & even considering going to Uni next year. You are right it is an evil disease & you deserve a life without it , you are worth it. With love xxx

Fantastic - keep challenging yourself - take one day at a time - but make sure its an increase each day - make 1 slice 2 - and maybe consider at least something a bit more "solid" - eg half a biscuit, a bit of bread - know those are probably giant steps - but I know you can do it - do it for yourself - you're a valuable and wonderful person - don't let anorexia tell you otherwise.