I need some advice, i'm becoming concerned that I am on the brink of developing an ED. My mother suffered from bulimia, so really I should be able to talk to her but feel that my family would be somewhat judgmental or wouldn't take me seriously, so I am here basically hoping someone will be able to reach out and help me to identify what is happening to me.
For the last few months I have become obsessive with being slim, calorie counting everything (even cups of tea), but also I feel like my eating is out of my control. I'll feel the overwhelming urge to eat when i know i don't need to, and then after bingeing i feel overwhelmingly guilty about what i've just eaten in such a short amount of time. I feel like i've hit my lowest point today, i ordered food, but after calorie counting i realized that i couldn't eat half of the meal, so i left half of it, but even after that, even though I should feel happy that I've controlled myself, I felt so ashamed of what I had eaten that I was nearly physically sick ( i didn't attempt to make myself vomit, I had an overwhelming feeling of wanting to be sick), and now i feel worse than ever, rather emotional if i'm being honest.
I hope someone can help,
Thank you in advance <3