my recovery

I was diagnosed with anorexia about a week ago, though i have been suffering from it for 6 years now, if not longer. I never purposely starved myself, but it just happened. I was abused by my father for years, and had been sexually assulted by my roommate 7 months ago. I was diagnosed with major depression disorder, generalized anxiety, panic disorder, and post traumatic stress disorder. Im 5'6 and 96 pounds. I feel so ugly and uncomfortable in my own body. I hate the person that I see in the mirror. To hide the pain, I became addicted to numerous substances and are recovering from that as well. No one in my family has ever had to deal with someone with an eating disorder so it makes me feel even more alone. Ive reached out for help and will be hospitalized and put in a rehab facility for 3-4 months to help me with these issues. I hope to god my children in the future never have to deal with this. The painfulness of eating, the struggle with my body image and the struggle with drugs, I wouldn't put on my worst enemy. I one day hope to look back at these journals and see my progression but i hope someone out there can give me some advice on how to cope with this. Thank you all for reading

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  • I had anorexia 25 odd years ago. I had neglect as a child. I still struggle a bit with eating matters but not seriously. Take help offered as you seem to be doing. Do not talk yourself down. Holidays are good I think. I had a recent bereavement so that's my Pennyworth for now. Good luck. Pm anytime

  • You've made a really brave step - hospital rehab is a bit thing to take on - but with all the issues you are dealing with I think it's a brilliant step to take. I shall be praying for you over the next few months - from talking to others who've spent time in hospital they don't regret this period of their lives - they were able to look at so many issues - and be supported during the weight gaining period - as well as being equipped for their return home - so good luck.

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