Im 18 years old, however growing up through secondary school I had maintained an eating disorder with out knowing, I always knew I was skinny but not verging on anorexic, as things got worse at home I kept my eating little but steady. Things got better and I was in a happier place for the last 2 years putting on a little weight but constantly fighting the negative thoughts of the weight doing me harm and my image seen as fat. My mum got diagnosed with a rare cancer last September when I was starting college again, this tipped me over the edge having bad thoughts and controlling my eating to the max, I was having regular counseling at the time and my counselor noticed and picked up on my eating habits as I lost alot of weight fast and looked gaunt. Now things are better ive put alot of weight on, im about just over 8 stone now and 5'3 height, however I eat alot of the wrong unhealthy foods and then feel awful as if I need to go on a starvation for several days, this then puts me in a mood for days as I feel fat, over weight and lethargic whilst nobody would want me like this, im missing that one thing, the old me and the skinny me, the friend and comfort in the control, but I know its bad and I feel weak for not being able to control my diet. I really like being quite skinny is this a crime or am I really missing something?? Please help and thank you for taking time to read this, any answers would be greatly appreciated
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