recovering again

Hi to everyone,

I am new to hear but i lost weight in 2012 and went down to 5stone, i recovered in a year, gain weight got a job, but now i have lost weight again, i am now 7 stone and height is 5 ft 1 tall, i went to my nurse today, 22 december and tommorow i will see a doctor, i have not been eating at all, because of stresses with boyfriend and home life.

well i am not sure if i can update this,but need help with low self asteem and trying to not reliey on my boyfriend, so much. He plays games and he is so spoilt at home and he does not want to work, or find a job.

Sorry for spelling mistakes.

12 Replies

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  • Hi there, yess :) Good to hear you are "self aware" and know when to seek help, you showed your ed who is boss before, so you CAN do it again. As far as your boyfriend and his mum go, well darl, that is their business. Sorry to sound blunt, you just have to let it go (how you feel). yess, people don't change, so interacting with others comes down to what YOU are ok with. You have got a job, you are kind to yourself (you did actively seek help), yess, a confident girl would not do that!! I'll let you in on a little secret EVERYONE has low self esteem at one point or the other ;) You will be ok, hey it's the holidays, give yourself a present and give yourself a break!! Merry Christmas, yess :) :)

  • no it is perfectly fine,to be blunt. I will to thank you so much for your advice, thank you. HUGE HELP.....

  • Good you recognise your problems - be open with the GP - and seek some help/support - counselling can really help with esteem issues - also you clearly need to start an "eating" programme - don't let the weight loss spiral out of control - you did so well to recover before - don't let the ED rob you of what you achieved. Good luck.

  • Thank you. i have and he has refered me back for more support, my doctor is so good. thank you for your advice.

  • Thank you. i have and he has refered me back for more support, my doctor is so good. thank you for your advice.

  • Hello Yess! It's great to see that you are reaching out for support and recognize that you don't want to back step in your eating disorder. Sometimes we have to let go of what is not working for us and move on. Not an easy decision but a worthwhile one. Also, be forgiving with yourself and be kind.

  • i am on the mend .....cant wait for life

  • Fabulous! It is so worth it. The more you recover the easier it gets until one day you just let go of ED!! Hang in there!

  • thank you for your kind words of support

  • Hi Yess, Bless you for your honesty! I know exactly where you are @ the moment! I started my umteenth time of Recovery in a Specialised High-Risk Eating Disorder Clinic in Psychiatric hospital in 2012.

    It was more out of desperation than anything, as I had been in Intensive Care Unit for a month earlier that year with Chronic Pneumonia, Septicaemia, Sepsis, Respiratory Failure, Organ Failure & had to be put on a Ventilator (Life-Support Machine) to save me!

    All the Professionals in Intensive Care did"nt hold out much hope that I would indeed survive! My 3 lovely sons were sent for (grown-up) & my fabulous husband had the insidious, horrendous thing in the world I can think of, to come & say their "Goodbyes" to me as I said I was"nt expected to have survived!

    Obviously by a Miracle they called it in hospital I did & spent month there in a dreadful state, touch & go many a time!

    I had 1:1 Counselling with Specialised High-Risk Eating Disorder after my weight went down under 5 stone & my BMI was drastically low! I am 5foot 1 inch (same as you!) I did start to make some sort of progress, it took me a year & half to get up to 6 stone!

    I, like you have "relapsed" & now back under the 5 stone mark! They discharged me from Out-patients @ 6 stone (found out afterwards it was due to funding!). I was then rushed back into hospital last year Intensive Care with Pneumonia, Sepsis, collapsed lung ect.

    The Specialised High-Risk ED Team took me back last Sept & I went on a 16 week Course! That is when the demons came back & the voice in my head of "Anna" started to scream & shout! I am like you as a loss of what to do next as obviously going to that Group made me much worse. It started with 12 of us only 4 of us remained, I asked the other 3 how they felt & they all said same as me, they felt it just made them want to be more in control & only we know how is restricting our food in-take.

    My heart goes out to you it truly does!

    I urge you to try not to go back down to the dangerous weight that I am now @ again!

    I don"t wish for sympathy, I only explained to you what happened to me, to try & prevent it from happening to someone else, like yourself in similar circumstances!

    I thought I was invincible, that I had Anorexia for so many years, nothing would happen to me, sadly I was oh so wrong! Anorexia is a Fatal Mental Illness, as I have found out to my expense!

    I have issues with my dad who physically/mentally/emotionally abused me as a child but I was over-coming them with the help of the 1:1 Counsellor!

    Please if you are offered help "Grab!" it for you life & don"t end up down @ your dangerous weight! I am absolutely petrified as where to turn @ the moment, as I am just so weak, fainting, feel so ill, frozen to my bones all the time! Next time, I may not make it & that just terrifies me!

    I am actively trying to seek help from different Mental Health Authorities, I just pray it will work for me this time! I also feel so ashamed as I have carried this insidious AN around with me for over 40 years, I am 54 this year!

    I wish you all the luck in the world, seeking help, please I beg you take it as your life can depend up on it later on in life! There is nothing more in the world I pray for is Recovery from being a Prisoner to this insidious illness of Anorexia Nervosa!

    You did it once, you can surly do it again! Before you go down the slippery slope of loosing anymore weight!

    You are in my thoughts & prayers & I wish you well

    Take care

    God bless

    Bettybaby XXXXX

  • Thank you so much for your story, my life is not as bad as yours and I am so sorry about your dad abusing you. Hope to keep in contact with you, you have achieved so much. Thank you once again, good luck for the future....

    P.S

    I am on the mend.

    xxxxxx

    yes

  • Hi yess, Bless you for your kind words of comfort, very much appreciated!

    I am so pleased you are on the mend, you have a good start with your weight @ 7stone, PLEASE don"t go down the route I did, not out of choice, as we know Anorexia is a "Mental Health Illness!". Not one of us in their right minds would "choose" to live in this manner! I certainly would"nt! As I know most Anorexics or anyone with an Eating Disorder would choose it but there are so many people who just cannot understand, that it is in fact an illness, we are not doing it for attention or the famous phrase "Well why don"t you just eat!!!" I hate that one. Lord only knows I would if I could!

    You deserve & owe it to your self to Recover, I pray that you do? You have done it once You CAN do it again.

    Good Luck to you/

    In my thoughts & prayers

    Take Care

    Lynn XXXX PS Please do keep in touch with me? If you wish to PM me, please feel free?

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