I feel trapped

[cmcon]

Hi all new to the community. really don't know where to start. I have had bulimia on and off for 13 years, started when I was 20 and it took total control of me.. I was binging and purging a few times a day..i lost weight..people told me I looked great..It just spared me on.. i tried to stop but I couldn't but then family found out and we're upset so I kinda promised I myself and them it wouldn't happen again, but every time there is a crisis or upset or a bad day imback to the binging and purging. i have such a bad relationship with food.. i feel trapped! I'm on antidepressants the past few months as I have had terrible depression for a long time..They are a lifesaver but I have such an appetite on them. I just want to feel normal and eat normal.. I've a few stone to loose but when I diet I end up obsessed and eventually crack and i'm back to square one any advice would be great..thanks

[njam]

Hello

The easy answer and not so easy to do solution is to eat.

Breakfast, lunch, evening meal and snacks start small and build it up. Eating like this will stop you getting ravenous. I never felt hungry let alone ravenous but after a period of restricting I'd feel wobbly decide to eat but once I did I couldn't stop and ended ip vomiting. I was also drinking wine which didn't help. It was to help me eat that I drank but then I was more likely to binge and vomit in the end I stopped drinking that was hard. Not as hard as eating...learning to eat though but that is the only way to do it. Get some support you won't do it all on your own. Hope that helps.

n

[piglet11]

Hi go to your doctor and tell that you need help, your doctor may refer you on the nhs waiting list to see a counsellor though you may have to wait a while as i had a wait a year before i saw my counsellor, so if you can afford go and see an counsellor privately