What do i do next?

Hi - i split up with my boyfriend almost a year ago and turned to food for comfort having put on almost a stone after 6 months - i had a serious word with myself in the summer last and got back on track as i am a real gym enthusiast normally have lots of willpower (still only lost about 7lb of the stone as i had a binge day probably 2 days a week but could get myself back on track the next day)- normally i have a great balanced diet - all natural foods lots of veg and protein daily(although always loved chocolate and cake as anyone) - towards christmas my ex has been in touch and its knocked me completely back and day by day it is getting progessively worse -rather than my one binge day, its now evreyday and i cannot pick myself up as before, i have been taking laxatives for over 4 weeks everyday (which i have stopped as one of my doctors orders going forward) this week alone i have spent £30 on chocolate and biscuits that i eat from my handbag at work so no one sees, on my drive home then once i get into bed and i cannot stop until i am sick or i feel in physical pain. I saw the doctor this week as i worked out some days my daily calorie consumption is about 3000-5000 but it does not make me want to stop! She said i have Bulimia and gave me some things to read but i feel like i do not really know what to do now. I have been talking about it to my friends trying to understand what i am doing and the day starts well and as soon as i eat my lunch i start again and cannot stop until i am in pain and/or sick - sneaking off to the shop as the 2 packets of biscuits havent filled me enough as i want them too. I just wondered if anyone else has felt like this and any tips on how to change my mind set to get things back on track would be very much appreciated..! xx

4 Replies

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  • The only thing you can do is eat 3meals a day plus snacks...it is hard going but its the only thing that will break the cycle. You just have to force and fight yourself to do it and keep doing it. Hope that helps x

  • I'm glad you have been to your GP and he/she took you seriously. It is also good that you have been able to share what is going on to your friends and here.

    Scientifically the combination of fat and sugar in processed food like biscuits, cake and chocolate sends messages to your brain to say you want more of them. That is why once you have started eating these things in a day it is very difficult to stop. I agree with the other reply that 3 sensible meals and snacks a day is the way out. I think you already know that though?

    One thing that can help is having an apple for a snack/end of lunch. It can help making a bit of a ritual of it e.g. chopping it up and paying attention as you eat it.

    I get a sense that you are effectively "punishing" yourself for the break up with your ex-boyfriend. Almost like self harming? Have you tried writing a letter or a poem about your underlying feelings? Perhaps counselling would help?

    looking forward to hearing how you get on

    xxx

  • Thankyou for making the effort to reply. Yes i do know what i should be eating, i normally eat such a well balanced diet. I just seem to have got myself into a state that i cannot control - yes my doctor said it is a way of self harming as i am not satisfied until i am in pain - i thought this should be enough to make me stop, i keep starting the day more positive but i just cant get the thoughts out of my head and each day ends the same.

    It is so strange because i am not unhappy or down just feel obsessed with what i can eat next!

    Yes therapy seems to be the option but the doctor did not really make it clear how i go about that so i was more looking if anyone else has felt the same and had any tips on chaning my mind set.

    I am going to see my doctor again and ask for help on referrals as i do not think the self help option is going to work at the minute!

    xx

  • I have had the same struggles that you have - you are not alone. I would suggest you return to your GP and tell him you need specialist help and support - don't wait and don't be fobbed off. I tried "going it alone" - it doesn't work.

    I have found it helpful to try structure my eating - I, with a dietician, have set up a meal plan with 3 meals and 3 snacks per day - I tend to decide what I'm aiming to have a week at a time - write it down in my plan - and try to stick to that - but don't beat myself up if I fail. I also make sure that I'm occupied straight after meals.

    Good luck - hope you get the support you need.

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