Unsociable: So they say that people... - Memory Health: Al...

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Unsociable

6 Replies

So they say that people with early on set become withdrawn and unsociable...well that's me!..When we are with a group of people I find myself filling in the words and even finishing my husbands sentences..I become very defensive and uncomfortable.. I love my friends but it's exhausting trying to cover for him..I feel like I might as well stay home,and not engage in social situation...

6 Replies
princess45 profile image
princess45

I would not cover for him. I would explain what is happening.

ChristianElliott profile image
ChristianElliottPartner

Search in your local area for "Memory Cafes". See more here: alzheimersspeaks.com/memory... They have been designed to address the exact problems you describe. Best of luck.

Katiebethpdxsea profile image
Katiebethpdxsea

Sorry to hear your problem. Honesty is the best way to go. Covering for someone else is not good for you. It sets a pressident that will take more and more of your precious energy to keep the charade up. Tell them what's going on. You will likely find people supportive and helpful.

Good luck.

in reply to Katiebethpdxsea

I would love to, but my husband is the one that doesn't want me to say anything...

Katiebethpdxsea profile image
Katiebethpdxsea

I understand. I'm the one who has cognitive problems, my son lives with me. I have not told many people in my social circle anout my problem. It's a vicious thing. The stigma of outing myself to others is stressful for both me and my son, however your post reminds me that I am not the only one struggling with the disease. Would I be as hesitant to reveal my illness to others if I had Cancer? Likely not.

There is such a entangled overlap with social consciousness and awareness with a cognitive issue. I know it's better for me to engage with others but I don't want to see pity in their eyes or feel marginalized. This makes it treacherous for my son. Not knowing what he can and cannot tell others about my circumstance. I might be embarrassed and my son does not want to see me that way.

Your post has helped me broaden my perspective on the insidious nature of the disease.

I guess maybe at some point it becomes more difficult to hide the truth from others. I think maybe it's an organic process of gradual revelation to your social circles.

I'm OK where I am right now. I likely need to have "this" conversation with my son While I still have the wearwithal to understand. Only you can judge of you can have this candid conversation with your hubby.

Thank you for speaking out. A support group may help, if you have the energy to try. It takes guys to speak out. Even to those closest.

Keep talking where you feel safe.

Best to you on this difficult journey.

in reply to Katiebethpdxsea

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