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AF and depression

Japaholic profile image
11 Replies

Since my bad bout two weeks back I have been, what I can only discribe as being, anxious and depressed.

I do try to be positive, but I worry about when it’s going to happen again and next ablations, drug cocktails etc etc

It’s xausing me some sleeplessness and insomnia, which in turn makes it worse, catch 22.

Can anyone else give experiences on how AF has affected their mental health?

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Japaholic profile image
Japaholic
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11 Replies
SpritzerAce profile image
SpritzerAce

Hello there. You are not alone. When I was first diagnosed with SVT I was in the same state as you are and it got worst when it “progressed” to AF. With Multaq I was depressed when I had to be on it. It took me about two months to come to grip that I had to get out of the state that I was in and not let AF rule my life. I know it is not easy as I still have the same anxiousness thinking of when it the next episode gonna hit me and when it does staying calm is easier said than done. But trust me as everyone else in this forum has been saying, this disease is not life-threatening if you are under the supervision of an EP and is well-controlled with medications. You just have to learn to accept your condition, read up as much as possible about it to eliminate unnecessary fear and misconceptions and most importantly try and stay positive. Surround yourself with positive people and to a certain extend don’t read too much from Google Dr ha ha. It can be overwhelming- so choose carefully the source of your info. Like someone said we all react differently to situations and medications and for AF unfortunately or fortunately you will have to go through rounds of trials before we find the right solution or treatment that suits us. Meanwhile , stay positive and remember that you are not alone in this. Come to this forum if you need support in whatever ways there are so many members here who hopefully will be able to give you the support that you need. Stay well and stay positive. Sending 🤗 your way.

CDreamer profile image
CDreamer

You may have missed this - posted Dec 2016 - compiled with the help of everyone on this forum.

Hope it helps healthunlocked.com/afassoci...

Finvola profile image
Finvola

It’s as much a psychological battle as a medical one Japaholic and I can so sympathise with what you are going through.

After I started (successful) drug treatment four years ago, I spent the early hours of most nights worrying about every aspect of coping with AF, fretting about the ‘what if’ scenarios, always imagining the worst. As you say, this made things worse and my physical and psychological health suffered.

I decided that these worries had no real solution because of the unpredictable nature of AF, so I tried mindfulness and my own form of CBT to try to cope.

What helped me most was the mantra - ‘My AF will return and when it does, I’ll find some way to cope. In the meantime, I’m going to live my life to the full’. Your AF has reared its head again but if you have decided to have a second ablation, then try to focus positively on that as your way forward, to try to push away uncertainty and the fears that come from it.

Take care.

Buffafly profile image
Buffafly

Hi, I am going to sound quite mad, but in a strange way I was relieved when I had a noticeable episode of AF a couple of years after my ablation. My heart hadn't felt right for a long time, so not a surprise really, but I was able to pinpoint a trigger (helped by reading posts here) and I was happy that the episode, though still fast, was less extreme and much shorter than before even without medication. I've had several since but after discussion with my cardiologist have decided to take minimal medication and try to avoid triggers (digestive upset/ overtiredness/ chest congestion) but put off another ablation unless things deteriorate. I am not suggesting this as a way forward for you, just saying it is possible to get to the situation where you think of AF as a 😠 nuisance rather than a 'night terror' but it takes time.

jedimasterlincoln profile image
jedimasterlincoln in reply to Buffafly

Exactly how I feel now, though it's difficult to pinpoint when the change happened - AF is not so much scary/worrying as it is an annoyance. However the impact it has on finance, work, home, family is still worrying the condition as a condition is just inconvenient now! ;)

Dinodog profile image
Dinodog

Many experience intense anxiety and depression from afib- but the good news is you have recognized it and can cope with it- it gets better. I was so debilitated by the return of afib this summer 5 months after ablation- heart rate 180, couldn’t breathe well, couldn’t drive- and I have 3 young kids- it was a nightmare. I turned to walking 4 miles a day, yoga and cutting out any and all possible triggers. Got my second ablation in September, and continued those things to cope with the anxiety afib causes me. Getting lots of ectopics but nothing I can’t live with. I think at some point we all have to come to a true acceptance of this condition- once we do- we can move forward in a better light. I tell myself I could have something far worse, and that I need to make the best of each day despite it. Anxiety consumed me for a while, and I work hard to keep it at bay. This won’t kill you- it’s annoying but very manageable when you take direction of your care. Hang in there!

Hi Japaholic, I can definitely relate! I read over the excellent article CD mentioned and have tried a lot of the suggestions in one way or another these past months. Such a great resource. I'd say that in general, I'm better off than I was a few months ago in this regard, largely as a result of using those types of techniques.

I don't really feel anxious much about whether an episode will come, but I find that the hardest part is the fatigue that comes after the combination of episode at night + insomnia. It seems to have a depressive effect on me and becomes harder for me to get at the things I need to get done.

I did make an interesting discovery in recent weeks, though, in the area of the mental game of AF. In my experience, AF has at times seemed like intuition on steroids. This is mainly with regard to interactions with other people.

Several weeks ago, I got a call in relation to a prospective new private teaching client. This was the assistant of the client, calling to see if it would work for me to teach this person, a French businessman in town and wanting to study on the weekend.

It was a great opportunity for me in many ways, things were falling into place, but for it to work, the logistics were rather crazy. Driving 40 minutes on a Sat. morning to teach my regular 3-hr language class, drive 40 min home; short break, hop on a train for a 30-minute ride into busy San Francisco and teach him for 4 hours, one-on-one, ending at 7 pm, then the train ride home. Crazy.

I had not done anything that physically intense since my 2nd ablation, but I decided to go for it. I figured that if I had an episode, I'd take my Flec and do my best.

Well, I was surprised by how well it all went. I was actually energized by the experience and realized that my heart was really enjoying this particular type of engagement! The guy wants to continue with lessons, too.

From the AF perspective, it was utterly fascinating. It turned out to actually be *good* for me to do this crazy day of teaching. It blew out of the water my anxious belief that anything that physically challenging would be bad for me.

The next week, I was having a video chat with another prospective client. Lots of anxiety in the guy, not such a great fit for my skills anyway. Toward the end, I went into AF; it's extremely rare that I have an episode in a situation like that. I had a visceral sense of *no!* Do not work with this guy. Tried to shake it all weekend and couldn't. As much as I wanted the money, I politely declined. The logistics would've been simple, but every time I thought of working with him, I felt utterly miserable.

Here's what I've discovered....

In retrospect, I can see that much of the strains of anxiety I felt for several months was related to working with a practitioner I ended up leaving. I "blamed" AF for the anxiety, but the anxiety was actually telling me something valuable. Once I got the message and took action, the anxiety lifted.

So in addition to the physiological aspect of anxiety and working on staying in balance, I've found it to be incredibly valuable to listen and write in my journal about what's coming up to see if there's valuable information for me that will ultimately be helpful and ultimately lessen the anxiety. It's tricky to tease it out, but worth the effort.

Hope that might be helpful somehow. Best wishes to you, Japaholic.

Japaholic profile image
Japaholic

Thank you people, is helpful to read all these messages. I thought about doing a video diary but feel foolish chatting to myself.

jedimasterlincoln profile image
jedimasterlincoln in reply to Japaholic

I've thought about doing a blog, if only for me and no one else to read. Coming here most weeks is good therapy too though.

Two periods of low mood stand out in my Journey which began in 2013. I'm sure there have been others, but the two most recent stand out in my mind.

I've posted here about it, which has been a great help. I think its safe to say everyone has been through the lowest points and been chased by the "black dog" at some point on their AF journey.

With both that period and one more recently I was in a bad place. The most recent episode wasn't as bad, but it went on for longer and I didn't talk to anyone about it which made it worse. Missus just spent a week wondering what the hell she'd done wrong. I was struggling being a stay at home dad 75% of the time, and doing a job I didn't want to do (but have to until my ablation) - feeling frustrated at being restricted professionally and personally.... cabin fever, mum was going through a Basal Cell Carcinoma and facial reconstruction, I was (and still am to a point) worried I wouldn't be able to return to my clinical role, felt stabbed in the back and unsupported by work... change in the weather, not as much freedom... it was also a period where Monday-Friday either me or her was at work then at the weekend (when I was off) she had a night shift which meant most of Saturday PM she slept, she was at work all night then most of Sunday she slept leaving me to hold the fort and wave goodbye to anything resembling "couple activity" or quality time.

Because I hadn't talked about it the missus wrongly interpreted my mood as my being unhappy with my life with her and the kids and resenting it all, so that was pretty tough to try and explain.

I have to say she has been ace, as has this forum. Her, and yourselves are the only people who know I've struggled with low mood. AF has affected my mental health, I was only 31 when it all kicked off and it was a long time to get over the fact that apart from a greater than most caffeine intake I was reasonably active and healthy whereas others who smoked drank binged etc "got away with it". I now know more about AF than most of my professional peers (albeit in Orthopaedics) which has improved my confidence not only in my condition but in being to help others.

One thing I would say, from experience, is if anyone is feeling low or at sea about their condition and home/work/earnings - whether they have AF or not - talk to someone. It helped me to talk to you lot because you're far enough detached to be objective/supportive and talked to my soulmate because she was the one suffering as a result of my mood/condition.

Japaholic profile image
Japaholic in reply to jedimasterlincoln

I feel your angst. It’s similar to me, since my most recent flare up it’s like .... well no one but you lot understand what’s i am going through.

I try and talk to the mrs but as she’s never had the fish flapping in her chest she doesn’t understand.

She tries, but she can’t empathize as she does t know.

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