Today I lost my best friend, my dog - Advanced Prostate...

Advanced Prostate Cancer

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Today I lost my best friend, my dog

dorke profile image
55 Replies

Since I got diagnosed, I was concerned who was going to leave first.I thought that I wouldn't want to make him suffer if i'm gone before him. And so it happened. He left before me.

So now I'm feeling like my guts are been ripped off. The emotional pain is so intense..

I'm sure he contributed a lot to me doing relatively well in my fight.I'm afraid its going to change now

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dorke profile image
dorke
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55 Replies
CantChoose profile image
CantChoose

I am SO sorry. It is so cruel to lose our beloved companions. They spend more time with us than most humans in our lives, so it's natural to feel intense grief.

Just get through today.

softwaremom00 profile image
softwaremom00

It is so heart breaking when they die. I am so sorry for your loss. I still tear up over our past pups. We are so lucky to have such little angels living with us. Sending hugs and prayers!

Softwaremom.

gleason9guy profile image
gleason9guy

I'm sorry to hear of this. I know how important they are. I have a Yorkie who is my emotional support animal. But there's another dog waiting on you. Maybe it's too soon. But keep it in mind. So many dogs to love, so little time.

I'm 68 and the only unconditional love I have ever received came from my dogs. I don't think I could live without one. Go get another one.

whatsinaname profile image
whatsinaname in reply to

IF, the grief is too much to bear, THEN, why go for another dog ?? Think about it. Either, you outlive the dog or the dog outlives you. In the latter case, unless the dog has someone reliable to look after him/her, it will be a very sad situation.

pjoshea13 profile image
pjoshea13 in reply to whatsinaname

While it's not a good idea to get a puppy, an older animal that might otherwise not get adopted could be a good solution.

-Patrick

whatsinaname profile image
whatsinaname in reply to pjoshea13

Agreed. One HAS to buy a dog that passes away before one does. OR Have someone very reliable to look after it after one passes.

in reply to whatsinaname

Our wives always out live us cancer or no cancer.

whatsinaname profile image
whatsinaname in reply to

Yes, the odds favor our wives outliving us, for sure. But, will they give the dog the same care and affection as we do ?? :-)

in reply to whatsinaname

My wife took two years to get Over losing the last one. She lost two years of joy and she realizes it now with the new one. She will hate losing this one but knows now it’s worse than no pup. This one a British lab. Black. Little smaller but fast and lean. Same lab personality. Good boy!

Mollyjones profile image
Mollyjones in reply to whatsinaname

Absolutely! I’m shocked to read that. Women adore dogs too.

whatsinaname profile image
whatsinaname in reply to Mollyjones

I don't deny that some women "adore" dogs.

But, by and large, I am of the opinion that men have a much greater affinity for dogs than women do.

Think about it. If you don't agree with me, we can agree to disagree.

Mollyjones profile image
Mollyjones in reply to whatsinaname

This is much to general. Men and women? I have always loved dogs, my neighbour told me that I would never have children as I loved dogs too much, it turned out to be true. I know many similar women, thankfully. Just let’s get in with loving our best friends and being happy that we have them.

whatsinaname profile image
whatsinaname in reply to Mollyjones

You have your view. I have mine.

And, I will keep mine irrespective or what you think or don't.

monte1111 profile image
monte1111 in reply to

That's not quite right. I think you meant ex-wives.

westof profile image
westof

Hi, I can relate to the loss. However, I agree with the previous posts. Go to a shelter and save a puppy's life. With the emotional support and the caring that you give to a new life, it may help you along the road.

Advo__cate profile image
Advo__cate

So very painful. I'm so sorry.

mrbill2 profile image
mrbill2

We recently lost a close friend, our daughter's Lab. I might suggest you google The Rainbow Bridge. It will bring some tears, but it helps.

Dachshundlove profile image
Dachshundlove

Dogs are so much better at loving than humans are. It makes them the best friends ever and as a furever dog Mom who strictly adheres to a 3 dog minimum in life, I’ve said good bye to many best friends and it’s always devastating.

Know that your fur friend would want another lucky dog to step in and walk this path with you. Love and light to you in this deep grief.

Yes of course it is a big loss and now a big void. As others have suggested find another dog when you've processed this loss. I too had that thought of which of us would go first -- me or my dog. It was my dog, at age 17.

You’re no dorke... I got a puppy upon my dx over four years ago . Chances are she’ll outlive me . Fine by me . I love her so . I don’t know what I’d do if something happened to her . It would shatter me to the core. This Lulu heals me everyday Dogs same as humans do have a life span . It’s natural we out live them . Hard on us , but you gave love and life as you could . Sorry that you’ve lost your buddy . Sucks .. we can learn much about unconditional love from our k-9 counterparts . Great pic . Thank you

Schwah profile image
Schwah

My boy is sleeping on my bed at my feet as I write this. He is my best friend no doubt. His joy at my coming home after as little as an hour is such an amazing thing. I can empathize with your loss. So sorry. But Don’t wait too long to get another. If you’re afraid to outlive a pup then get a senior dog that someone else had to leave. Isn’t that what you’d want for your best friend if you’d left early ? It won’t take away your pain but it will give you joy. That I promise.

Schwah

siouxbee19 profile image
siouxbee19

My sincerest sympathies for your loss, I can totally relate, it truly is so painful beyond words. I lost 3 of mine within 8 months, 1 was totally unexpected, 1 was the best "nurse" I've ever known!

I do feel like you need to grieve, for however long you need, but please do consider heading to your local shelter/rescue and adopting a new buddy. Of course you can't replace your precious boy, but you can adopt another with so much love to give that will help fill a small part of the hole in your heart! It's a win/win in so many ways!

~ Peace to you ~

Rmurchu profile image
Rmurchu

So sorry for your loss, please go to the shelters and find an older dog that has been surrendered because of an owner illness , there are many older dogs that are looking for their saviour ,I think this could be you , as you can both help each other right now. Please consider it , there are many older dogs that are not being considered because if there age. This will help with your grieving as well I believe . Good luck !

Hohman profile image
Hohman

Many peaceful wishes for you...I too lost a special fur baby this year. I did decide to adopt again and it has helped knowing I could offer a good life to a new special one! So sorry!

leo2634 profile image
leo2634

I feel your pain brother I just lost my dog a few weeks ago . I look for her everyday and think of where she would be at the moment. When I was diagnosed and spent more time at home because of our illness it became my normal to constantly have her by my side . I'm lost without her and although she was my best friend she was family too. My thoughts and prayers go out to you and know you have a brother sitting here sharing the same tears. Never give up never surrender. Leo

in reply to leo2634

Get one today Leo

leo2634 profile image
leo2634 in reply to

I can't right now I don't think I can go through the heartache again I still look for her everyday. It's terrible....

in reply to leo2634

One day with the new pup and all your memories of your lost buddy will be good ones. comparing them to each other is the best part. Forgetting them isn’t what you want it’s to remember and that’s the best way. Start looking today. I promise you will be glad.

leo2634 profile image
leo2634 in reply to

Maybe one day I just can't deal with it now I'm a mess..

in reply to leo2634

Not to make light of losing your pup but as you know ADT makes us way more emotional beyond normal. It does me anyway. Don’t let it get you.

leo2634 profile image
leo2634 in reply to

I agree my wife said she never seen me cry like that in 45 years of marriage. I still look in her favorite nap spots everyday. Maybe one day but not now.

in reply to leo2634

Me too. Cry like a baby.

16starsky profile image
16starsky

Yes I also agree, when the time is right, give a homeless dog/cat a loving home and they in return will give you their unconditional love.

Ive lost many Cats over the years, and its heart-breaking when they leave us,

No one can replace your baby, but in time you can love another, Animals leave paw prints on our hearts.

So sorry for your loss Kim

Harley1948 profile image
Harley1948

Same happened to me after ART this year. Our 17 year old Jack Russell passed away. I have not been on a walk since or outside much for that fact - even at our cottage. Last night, we picked up a Jack Russell mix from a shelter. I have had much affection in one evening and my mood has already improved. I was not going to get another dog after Skipper and it took time. I am glad I did. The grandson we adopted is fully participating and committed to helping - I have a family again too!

I am very sorry for the loss of your best friend.

leo2634 profile image
leo2634 in reply to Harley1948

Mine was a Jack Russell/ Rat terrier mix her name was Cannoli only 8 years old developed bladder cancer. So the decease not only haunts me it took my best friend away from me.

pilot52 profile image
pilot52

Good Morning, Get a new one as soon as possible...This will help fill the void...Find one now and do not spend time without...you will know when you see the right one.....

larry_dammit profile image
larry_dammit

😢😢 I too have a puppy, she is my best friend and goes everywhere I go. My wife I’d worried about the same. Sorry for your loss. Keep on fighting the monster 🙏🙏🙏

pjoshea13 profile image
pjoshea13

I agree. I have done this recently. -Patrick

EdBar profile image
EdBar

Very sorry for your loss, I have a springer spaniel too, she is my little buddy, my support dog of sorts. It would hit me pretty hard too if she left. I agree with others, maybe get a senior dog, hang in there brother.

Ed

Vindog29 profile image
Vindog29

Dorke you will continue to fight, you will continue your battle to do well and his memory of unconditional love and strength will help you heal. His role on earth although so short had a purpose in your time of need....his memory cannot be taken....keep going....we march with you

You have a lot of time to prepare for him or her to move on to another home. Get one today.

Litlerny profile image
Litlerny

My heart goes out to you! I know the pain of losing a loving pet is enormous. I’ve got a 14 year old Shih Tzu (Bogey) who has been my best buddy since he was a pup. We would be lost without each other. We lost Bogey’s 17 year old sister about 2 1/2-3 years ago. He was more of a mess, grief-wise, than my wife and I were. He had never been without her in his entire life. We waited, but finally broke down and got him a baby sister (Abby, another Shih Tzu) about a year ago. She is a joy and a blessing to all of us. Abby brought Bogey (and my wife and I) out of our funk.

Take your time to heal on your own schedule. You’ll know when the time is right to get another doggy buddy. Meanwhile, I hope your grief and sadness soon evolves into happy memories.

NurseRatched profile image
NurseRatched

Aww, you had an ESS, which we also have. Such sweet, loyal dogs!

I’d like to suggest that you channel your grief into a positive ~ volunteer as a Foster home with a good, local rescue. You will save a life in the process! Perhaps fostering will help mend your broken heart without feeling like you immediately ‘replaced’ your best friend.

Have-faith profile image
Have-faith

Oh I am so sorry for your lies. I know how much comfort our fur babies bring us. God did not have it in the plans that they live as long as us. I am sure you provided a great home to your pup. Although one dog does not replace another I am sure a shelter has a dog waiting for you! Animals do help with our healing. Not to mention how they add to us keeping active. Sending good vibes your way and hoping you find it in your heart to give another pup a home.

herb1 profile image
herb1

Hi Dorke, I know how you must feel. I've gone that route again and again and again...And I keep doing it AGAIN! It's the only way for us. But I would like to make a few suggestions to you (and others).

1. While you're waiting for your heart to heal (it never does!) offer to temporarily foster a dog. Many shelters are still crowded and the only way they can cope is by people taking the critters into their home. I warn you, giving them back is VERY tough.

2. Check your estate plan. Be sure you've made arrangements for your pets' care, love, AND FINANCING if you go first.

3. Most [relatively] pure breeds have their own rescues. It keeps a dog out of the shelter and still get what you want (mine have been brittanys for 9 yrs). Often the groups will transport across country to get the right dog to the right person. Or you could be a transporter!!

4. May you find peace and always have wonderful memories of your furry friends.

herb

Wdoug profile image
Wdoug

Let the great memories keep you comforted. Great photo!

MC1976 profile image
MC1976

All who have lost a valuable doggy member of the family know how you feel. I have tears in my eyes thinking about your loss. Will Rogers said, "if there are no dogs in heaven then when I die, I want to go where they are." Will's remark reflects how they are loved. CA

monte1111 profile image
monte1111

Love the puppies.

Collarpurple profile image
Collarpurple

Please go look at the dogs at shelter or online shelters. Will always miss your buddy but

The right is already waiting and your buddy knows it. Too much love not you have to give and receive

And as we know on this site cherish everyday

Also we have had to put 2 labs down at only 5 and 6 due to kidney and cancer

Now we have a very spoiled lab that can’t be with out us. Does it mean we don’t miss the other two but this one brings us such joy and unconditional love and support and sometimes life it’s pretty crappy and then you look at that face And you smile and laugh again

j-o-h-n profile image
j-o-h-n

Well dorke... they said it all.... All I can add is that I'm glad I ordered a blow up dog when I ordered my blow up doll.

Your dog looked like a King Charles Cavalier......who are wonderful dogs.... The saying goes "The more I know my dog, the less I like people".... Get another dog.... Hey, look at me I got another wife.....

Good Luck, Good Health and Good Humor.

j-o-h-n Tuesday 07/30/2019 8:13 PM DST

Kaliber profile image
Kaliber

Our beloved teacup poodles became old men and passed , so I know your pain. My dog Teddy died in my arms having a stroke. We should have gotten new puppies when we knew they were ailing.

Now my other best friend is disappearing too .... I call it Wilber .

Sorry for your loss but you can rectify that loss at least with a cuddly new puppy.

StuartS profile image
StuartS

Extremely sorry to hear if your loss. Dogs very quickly became an integral part of the human family..., and rightly so. They offer unconditional love and support and ask only food and lodging in return. We treat them and talk to them like children and it is no wonder when they pass on that we feel like we have lost a close family member. Grieve for your loss but consider the companionship you have had with your dog..., all those happy times that will remain great memories and consider offering that commitment again to another, perhaps less fortunate dog. A dog perhaps who is in the twilight of their years and for no fault of their own is looking for a forever home to spend the last few years of their life. You clearly have enjoyed your time with your last dog..., why not share a few years with another.

Written with my Border Collie at my feet pawing me to take her out for her final bimble of the day in an unseasonally warm West of Scotland.

Pierreb profile image
Pierreb

I am so sorry to hear about your dog. My heart breaks for you. I have two little poodles I love dearly. I can only imagine how difficult this must be. I hope you are doing well. As others have mentioned when you are ready you might find another friend at a shelter that needs someone to love them. I hope you are doing well and hang in there.

Mollyjones profile image
Mollyjones

Hope you are doing well Dorke, it all takes time. It’s 7 months since we lost our great love. He still leaves a great big hole in our lives. We already had another dog, they bring such joy. You will know what is best for you. Best wishes.

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