I was recently RE - diagnosed with ADHD. With that being said, I have gone years without actively working towards myself and have been unmedicated. I've always struggled with low self esteem and am finding out that that is a common theme with ADHD. I'm really trying to be aware and work on myself. I believe that I'm struggling with regulating my emotions. (My boyfriend has told me this many times.) I'm aware that a lot of my relationship issues stem from my lack of esteem. With all this being said, I would like to give some examples and am hoping to get advice on how to handle and or cope with these situations.
- I express that I need more affection. (Due to lack of self esteem) My partner believes that he is doing more but I am just not seeing it. What are some good tips to comfort myself when I feel like I am needing more affection?
- We discuss the same issues multiple times. To him it feels like I am constantly criticizing him, while in my mind I am trying to bring up things that we need to work on to make us work. It doesn't help that they are repeated arguments but I don't feel like the issues get resolved or worked towards, resulting in me bringing it up yet again. How do I go about bringing up the problem and finding a conclusion without making my partner feel attacked?
- This isn't a result of ADHD necessarily but I am hyper fixating on this issue. My partners ex is in his same friend group so with that itself I have to accept that she will be around. All though, a recent conversation we had has left me feeling like I will never be enough. He expressed that he occasionally compares the two relationships and was happier in the previous one because our repeated conversations are weighing down on him. Previously I have felt like he places more concern into her feelings than mine. To add to this, last month while on a trip with his family he called me by his exes name and his ex and him are best friends on snapchat.. I am trying to tell myself that if he didn't want to be, he wouldn't be with me. Can anybody offer me advise with this? Honestly, anything.. Am I overreacting, am I being childish, am I hyper fixating, how can I get over this, etc. Please please help.