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Spouse of angry, raging, out of control ADHD husband seeking to connect with others for friendship and support

Chris_Chris_ profile image
43 Replies

Hello! My husband has a raging anger problem and severe ADHD. He’s gotten so bad it’s abusive. It’s made my life a living hell- so much so it’s actually caused me to have stress induced health problems. I’m literally getting hurt by his verbal attacks. I’m looking for another person who understands my situation to connect with, possibly another woman with a husband like mine. Maybe we could text or talk on the phone? If you’re looking for a friend and/or support like I am please reach out, I’d love to meet you!

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Chris_Chris_
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43 Replies
Silas22 profile image
Silas22

Hey, I’m new to this platform and new to being diagnosed with pretty severe combined type ADHD. I (28y) have also been verbally abusive towards partners in the past. Sometimes, the only way to get myself to stop (my brain becomes an impenetrable fog) was to slap myself in the face. Once I had to call in sick at work as my face was too badly bruised. Feeling out of control and misunderstood fuel the anxiety and aggression - even if the catalyst for either was minor (example: someone doesn’t like my taste in music). My impulsivity gas gotten me into trouble more times than I can recount. Drinking, spending my whole paycheck on something I don’t even need, dropping out of high school, drugs, my heart stopping because of drinking and using... you name it. It took me getting dumped a few times before I realized I had a problem that wasn’t incurable, but very much manageable. Hopefully it doesn’t have to come to that with your husband. You must love him very much for posting on this site and I hope that you know when it’s become too much. He needs to understand that he needs help. If he doesn’t, there’s little you can do. A lifetime spent of being slapped around by one’s own brain is tough, but nobody deserves the same treatment by proxy. If you like, you can write me a personal message if you feel like my story reminds you of him. In any case, I wish you all the best of luck and love.

Chris_Chris_ profile image
Chris_Chris_ in reply to Silas22

Hi Silas! I sincerely appreciate that you reached out and took the time to tell me all of that, and man, it really sounds like my husband! He had a history of alcohol abuse and is a recovering alcoholic. I’m feeling very hopeful hearing from you and what you’ve been through!

Tiggerakafidgity profile image
Tiggerakafidgity

Hi chris

I’m the husband just like yours only my wife made me homless.

You know I gave her a book on adhd to read as basically it was a manuel on me.what Better hey.

So in the 8 yrs she read 17 pages and got no support.

She even called my psychiatrist to get me sectioned so she could have a break.he said I could but I won’t as he will come back home to the same old shit.

Yup I used to shout scream say horrible stuff.

So I bet he just flips when he gets angry ?

He doesn’t get angry it’s called being frustrated at being over passionate about somet you believe.

So you need to sit down with him ok.

Pen and paper and just try to get to understand what flips him

There are loads of books on surviving the adhd marriage.

Yup it may seem hard work but if he is willing you need to work togethor to see what would help and what doesn’t.

What I will say is that he probably doesn’t even know or remember what he does or says and it’s not till three days later he comes to apologise.

I put so much effort in to my marriage and supporting her children.but then when I get shouted at for telling the kids and it’s in front of them then they don’t respect me as the parent.

Hence I used to lose it as I would ask the children to do something and they would refuse yet my wife asks and they kinda behave.

There will be certain tings that set him of.

Also there are things that annoy you but you don’t need to show it.

I bet he is the loveliest guy though and probably moves mountains for the family when needed.

My wife would start to say calm calm very soothingly and it actually worked.

She tried it twice gave up and said it didn’t work.

Ok I may have adhd and loads of other problems but I went above and beyond for my wife and her kids and I just done over well and truly.

I hope that helps a little

You need to work as a team like any couple woujd have to any way

T

Chris_Chris_ profile image
Chris_Chris_ in reply to Tiggerakafidgity

Hi T! Wow, thank you so much for taking the time to tell me all of that stuff! I sincerely appreciate hearing how you felt and what you did. I’m sorry your wife wasn’t as receptive as you had hoped and I’m sorry to hear your marriage ended. I’m concerned that will happen to me. I especially appreciate your suggestions and the support I feel now from your response- not feeling completely alone- there are other people out there like you who understand all too well what I’m going through.

Tiggerakafidgity profile image
Tiggerakafidgity in reply to Chris_Chris_

Hi Chris

Your most welcome

Tiggerakafidgity profile image
Tiggerakafidgity in reply to Chris_Chris_

Tread a little carefully as I know I felt so ashamed after calming down and seeing what I had done and how I had hurt the ppl I most loved.

T

Chris_Chris_ profile image
Chris_Chris_ in reply to Tiggerakafidgity

Yes! My husband is that way too! I believe he’s quite ashamed of how he acts, and the other part is I think he doesn’t understand his badly he’s hurting me.

rubystarsapphire profile image
rubystarsapphire in reply to Chris_Chris_

I do not recongnize any of this male behavior in the thread and I dont think it's ADHD. What it actually sounds like is borderline personality disorder, plus maybe some brain damage from excessive alcohol intake. Men are very frequently misdiagnosed. Id look into borderline PD if the person is switching off and on to extreme anger.

VolleyMomma profile image
VolleyMomma

I wonder if this might be what is going on with my husband. He flips very quickly from being ok to being very angry. I am not sure I would categorize it as abusive, although maybe some verbal abuse at times, but this makes me think. . .my son was just diagnosed with ADHD and my husband's father has it too. My husband insists he doesn't. Honesty, i thought he might just have narcissistic tendencies and depression, but the quick flips of anger. . is that ADHD? One minute everything is fine, and then the next. . .something happens that sets him off and his mood is ruined for the rest of the day.

Tiggerakafidgity profile image
Tiggerakafidgity in reply to VolleyMomma

Hi volley

Ask him if his brain feel like a speeding train or bullet.

I would say 100% there is adhd there.

He may be dispelling him having adhd as he may feel he doesn’t want to be labelled.

I’m glad I found out I had adhd.

Ok I was diagnosed at 40 but it was such a relief to me as I knew and felt what a round peg in a square whole feels like.

T

Chris_Chris_ profile image
Chris_Chris_ in reply to VolleyMomma

Hi Volley! Yes!! It’s 100% ADHD! It’s called emotional dysregulation. And ADHD rubs in families too. I think it might be worth revisiting the possibility with your husband.

rubystarsapphire profile image
rubystarsapphire in reply to Chris_Chris_

"Emotional Dysregulation, also known as emotional dysregulation, refers to a poor ability to manage emotional responses or to keep them within an acceptable range of typical emotional reactions. This can refer to a wide range of emotions including sadness, anger, irritability, and frustration. "

Potentially overblown emotional reactions. NOT abuse.If its abusive, the cause lies somewhere else. What I see here more than anything are partners and spouses who complain about ADHD as if it were a catchall. Most of them havent even bothered to understand or learn about ADHD ,but use the diagnosis against their spouse. If the ADHD spouse is feeling overwhelmed by their lack of care in situations and goes overboard, without being abusive, somehow it still seems to be twisted into abuse by these spouses who do not even bother to learn about ADHD, and take no responsibility in the interaction between them and their mate.

Im not abusive to anyone, I dont fly off the handle at random people because Im frustrated, I dont know anyone else with ADHD who does either, and Im sick of abusiveness being touted as a symptom, when it is not. If someone reacts abusively, it is in them, not the medical condition of ADHD. It may be likely that an abusive partner has other comorbidities along with ADHS that are actually at fault. or they are just shitty abusive people.

rubystarsapphire profile image
rubystarsapphire in reply to rubystarsapphire

"My husband has a raging anger problem and severe ADHD. He’s gotten so bad it’s abusive."

Ok. So your husbands anger problem is at fault here, not the ADHD. Anger problems can be caused by a myriad of things. GO get diagnosed and get help, for each and both of you . Good luck.

Tormented555 profile image
Tormented555 in reply to rubystarsapphire

"Go get diagnosed".. where?

rubystarsapphire profile image
rubystarsapphire

It sound like youre going through some abuse that is not caused by ADHD. I am not sure why so many spouses seem to latch onto the idea that the abusive people they are with are abusive because of ADHD/ Other than maybe they have that diagnosis and other than learning about it, they use it to blame the partners bad behavior on. Go to therapy or leave him. Its not the ADHD that causes anyone to 'verbally assault' or otherwise harm a person, it could be a myriad of other things that is causing it. But I am getting sick of hearing spouses of people with ADHD come on here and blame every kind of abusive beahvior under the sun on this diagnosis.

You defintely need help. Seek it from a professional who understands what the medical diagnosis of ADHD means. It aint this.

fuzzee profile image
fuzzee in reply to rubystarsapphire

Agree, and will add... abuse of YOU is inexcusable.

Usualname profile image
Usualname in reply to rubystarsapphire

Your responses seem troubling for so many reasons. It’s not appropriate in my opinion to offer other diagnoses, like bipolar, and it seems like you are defensive about having ADHD and being labeled as an abuser, so you offer this terrible advice with the intention of protecting only yourself because you are offended. Emotional dysregulation certainly can cause abusive behavior! If you truly are not an “abuser,” you would be aware of this, and take steps to manage your emotional dysregulation so that you don’t act abusively towards others. Abuse doesn’t have to be intentional. Just because you don’t want to harm someone doesn’t mean you are not harming them.

Emerald-Eyes profile image
Emerald-Eyes

Is he on any ADHD medication?

Chris_Chris_ profile image
Chris_Chris_ in reply to Emerald-Eyes

Hi Emerald-Eyes, yes, he is taking Adderall.

CherJer profile image
CherJer

Well, I know EXACTLY how you feel. And as for the others saying us nonADHDers don't know anything, and "like to blame" ADHD, I have done research, I've read books, I've offered suggestions to help with forgetfulness. And nothing changes. Emotional dysregulation, means ADHDers can't stop and think about the words about to come out of their mouth. I get that. If it was a once in a while occurrence, I could tolerate the belittling name calling. What I have a hard time tolerating is the daily occurrence of being called nasty names, having my past thrown in my face every opportunity, and the general narcissistic behaviour as a result of kindly reminding him to look for a job, or to take out the trash. Us nonADHDers are constantly told to be empathetic to their nonstop brains. Yet, they are unable or incapable of showing empathetic qualities themselves.

I'm curious if there is such a thing as equality in a relationship with one spouse having ADHD.

My spouse was diagnosed at 4yr old. He is now a 44 yr old unmediated unmanaged ADHD grown man. Every single day, something "pisses him off". Waking up makes him mad for Pete's sake. I spend every hour at home walking on eggshells, praying me breathing won't set him off.

As for being homeless, right now I'm currently fighting my eviction notice given by my lovely mother, who is sick of hearing us fight. So even the threat of being homeless isn't enough for him to go get help, medication, or to even try and change his destructive ways. And me, I got nowhere to go, this is my home, my mother owns it. If I left, I'd be in the same house still!

So please, if anyone has their experience to share with me, what it took for them to get help, for the ADHD person to actually see and understand, that life is not a joke, that being such an abusive bully is NOT fun for the other party, and that this chaos is preventable, or at the very least manageable, please share.

Cuz I can't even laugh at the chaos beginning, I'm accused of being maniacal and being the one needing help. I can't cry without being accused of having nothing to be sad about. Hell i cant even get him to admit he does anything wrong, therefore its not him who needs help, it must be me!

Crazy going slowly am I!

Chris_Chris_ profile image
Chris_Chris_ in reply to CherJer

You are the person I’ve been looking for!! You get it!!! Everything you described I can relate to! Would you like to talk on the phone?

Chris_Chris_ profile image
Chris_Chris_ in reply to CherJer

Or text?

troyhenn2 profile image
troyhenn2 in reply to CherJer

i hear you god i hear you ,i am living with this 30 years , i am broken , 😡 he is just like your guy but maby worse /? god help us ,,, he will not accept he has any issues , i am on blood pressure tablets , sleeping tabs and relaxers because of his adha , and pbh , my stress is killing me , he runs away to hotels , if any little thing goes wrong on holidays he leaves me runs out takws passport x wallet and flys back on hours flights home for a simple think,?,, 🤔 like if some one look at me , he is off , i was very ill and on vac machine for 10 weeks , major op he got a mood , and left me alone and went off to airport and stayed two weeks away , i this happing all my 30 years with him , i live on egg shells every day ,,, , today , i am doing a big change 😡 , 🥲🥲🥲🥲 lovely man when he is good 8 weeks a year //////?// if be honest 😩. he is good at his job , but can not do one think in home can not even empty hoover if blocked , cant put a cup away leaves his plate c cups all over , can not clean up not even after himself , has never ever ever paid a bill or even open open envelopes address to him , bad x sad case , i really must change ,, ny body is not able any more 😩😩😩😩😩😩😩, good luck to any young non adhd person ,please read up and look after your life , what ever way you need to , god blesss ❤️

sarabere1984 profile image
sarabere1984

Hi Chris! I am super new to this group, and ADHD/ADD. My fiance has this disorder and it's new to him and me. He is not abusive, but I do greatly struggle with his behavior. And actually, I am the one who does the majority of shaming or judgment (what I'm trying to work on). I'd be happy to connect if you're still looking for folks. We may not have the exact same struggles, but I bet it's not far off and I have a good ear for listening.

I think a really important question here is how was your husband before Adderall? Did you ever see him without adderall or on any different adhd medication. I ask because Adderall can cause rage in some people. Adderall, nicknamed by some, Madderall, isn’t always the best fit for some people. I would highly recommended you husband going to his dr and going through his current struggles. I think a good start would be changing his medication and upping his dose. My nephew was recently diagnosed and would have crashed from the Adderall so severe, my sister had to call the police more than once. They switched him to concerta, he’s a little prince now. These medications REALLY are subjective. What works for one, may not work for another. Your husband likely still believes his medication is doing well for him because he feels it working. But that doesn’t mean it’s working better than another medication my brain working. He maybe resistant to change. Afraid he will loose his medication but he should absolutely change to something else and hopefully his dr could assure him that trying something else is a good thing.

I hope this helps.

I was only recently diagnosed but for the past 2 years, I was the abuser. I was constantly angry at my husband. For the record, I had plenty of valid reasons, however, it was impossible for me to control myself when he was around. Everything he did was wrong. I wanted to leave him every day because I had become this terrible person. I 100% wouldn’t have blamed my husband for leaving me either. I was fully aware that my attitude was awful! But I was also aware that it was his behavior causing me to act like that. Which is why I thought of divorce everyday.

Since I started my medication, our house is completely different. I can process things now, I’m not as bothered by small things and I can let things go now. Since starting my medication, I’ve realized that my husband also has adhd! If you can believe that. His adhd (which is actually worse than mine if you ask me) triggered my adhd. So we had a good mess. I’m on Adderal now. But like I said, my nephew didn’t have the same reaction. He got the Madderall reactions. Now he’s better. My husband likely starts medication in about 2 weeks. Fingers crossed!!!!!!!

But seriously. Consider a medication change! His dr should be aware of all the current marriage problems. They’re part of assessing whether his medication is effective! Which it doesn’t seem to be.

I also second what some other people above said. Emotional dysregulation is 100% part of adhd. However, abuse, whether you have adhd or not, is unacceptable. If your husband isn’t willing to get help, you shouldn’t subject yourself to this behavior anymore. Perhaps a separation would help him realize that he needs to assess his situation.

Hi know this thread is old but me and my husband both have ADHD and both experience emotional dysregulation which leads to irrational fights. The difference between us, though, is that I studied psychology and seek support and help that is specifically targeted at people with ADHD and he... knows nothing about adhd except that he has it and thinks it doesn't effect him.

This dynamic results in me being able to recognize when I have a sudden, unnecessary emotion and I can try to calm myself down. He cannot. If I have a sudden outburst of anger or irritability, then he gets an increase in anger or irritability. Since he thinks his anger is justified, he doesn't give me time to soothe myself and apologize for an outburst. We just become two opposite wind streams that create a tornado. The whole time I'm trying in vein to get him to understand that I didn't mean to have an outburst and he won't accept that this is all a misunderstanding. It feels abusive. I walk on egg shells around him.

Ive told him multiple times that I don't know how to help him when he gets in an extreme mood and it's not helping my efforts to control my own. So we should both see mental health professionals but this conversation is that starts the fight! He refuses to go to counseling because he doesn't really believe in it! He thinks we should be able to comfort eachother but I really cannot help him at ALL. It makes me feel isolated. It makes me feel like I'm one bad word choice away from making him feel like I hate him which makes him angrier! My friends say it's not fair that I rationalize his outbursts when he doesn't give me the same courtesy. And I know he feels like he's being abused but at least I feel bad for hurting him and starting it afterwards.

This isn't advice. I really don't know what to do about it. Our biggest fight yet was last night and it was over me getting excited over finding out about adhd coaches, him saying it was a dumb idea, me taking offense and things escalating as we both got more and more upset over the others reactions. I left the room to self regulate and that made him EVEN ANGRIER.

So, I guess you could talk to me too because I'm feelin a bit abused.

Chris_Chris_ profile image
Chris_Chris_ in reply to Stardustdaydreams

Hi! Thank you for writing such a long and detailed message to me! I’m really happy to connect with you! As I read your reply I could completely relate! I don’t have ADHD but the rest applies to my situation. I’d be very glad to talk with you and learn more about what it’s like to have ADHD and also to just connect with someone who “gets it” too. You sounds really reasonable and like you genuinely want to make things right. I get that. I also feel like I’m the fixer, plus I feel terribly alone. It’s such an awful predicament to be in.

Stardustdaydreams profile image
Stardustdaydreams in reply to Chris_Chris_

I have since talked to my husband about our whole fight and it's double sided. I'm starting to look into how to get a healthy lifestyle and manage my symptoms and other mental health issues better. But, one thing I learned from my conversation with him is that I thought he wasn't being introspective, but he thought that I didn't think he could have complex emotions. I was trying to reason why he was acting like this and coming up with answers without asking him why. I don't doubt that you are being abused by your husband, but if you feel safe enough, I would try talking to him and hearing his side in a neutral manner. You know, not outright saying, "you've been a dick why" but more like, "youve seemed irritated lately, why is that? Is there anything you need help with?" In my experience, my husband will actually unload his problems if I ask kindly or have what we call a "debrief" after emotional arguments to figure out why a situation got as far as it did and know what each person has to acknowledge or work on in themselves and with eachoter. I have to keep myself from taking his responses personally but it's also something I have realized I have to work on because I take literally everything personally.

LaughnJar profile image
LaughnJar

Just because someone may have a diagnosis does not mean that the conditions symptom profile is suffecient enough to attribute e ery problem behavior one may exhibit. I was not diagnosed with ADD inattentive type, until well into adulthood. In order to get to said diagnosis along with generalized anxiety disorder, my journey to now required fighting a battle with addiction to alcohol; fully and wholly mind, body and spirit were all in it's death spiral. Until I had no choice but to admit admit I was a bottle junky and allow trust in others to help me do what I could not do for myself. My add dx came four years later. And while I use a multimodal care approach, correctly titrated optimal pharmacotherapy had the single most profound positive effect on symptom management. I was lucky at that because of a clinical who was more aware of what current scientific research is confirming: some addicts require a higher than fda approved max daily dose of meds. Even those that have proven to be psychoactively addictive like dexedrine: my prescription for nearly nine years has proven stable, I've had one instance necessitating a second monthly fill due to theft and never sought increase to the 90 mg dextroamphetamine cr caps per day in the nine years since that was determined as optimal for me.

So I have "multi- morbidities" I guess. BUT I WAS NEVER ABUSIVE, BELLIGERENT, MEAN OR ANGRY ETC.. Not narcissistic, nor anti social personality.

The above, INCLUDING ABUSE (emotionsl or physical) are separate psychological conditions. With clinically established criterion required for making a disgnosis. And I know abuse is a stand alone condition, because it is about the need to control another. Most often those the abuser is intimately connected to are their victims. I know, because my wife began her emotional abuse of me and then our son after being together for 23 years! And we are still together because she has admitted it is a problem. ansxshe can't stop on her own. She is not a threat to the lives of me or my son. And I am still sober. But for my own struggles and need of compassion, I would be long gone. She seems to be improving, but nothing is guaranteed. That is difficult to accept. But I must if I want to have the strength of send to know the absoluteness that it is not my fault. And to be able to know if the time comes that I must leave with my son and her with herself. I hope that never happens. But not blindly so.

Peace

Stardustdaydreams profile image
Stardustdaydreams in reply to LaughnJar

I am currently trying to renew treatment on my ADHD and emotional/personality Disorders. I would just like to ask you about multimodal care and your treatment? What is multimodal care? How did you find the correct treatment or provider? Maybe this isn't the place for this question, but your story makes me feel like my search for symptom management is not in vain.

BeeGees11 profile image
BeeGees11

Hi Chris are you still on here? Still married? Do you have an update? I would love to connect via text .. I need support in a huge way.

You need to go see a therapist, then potentially a marriage counselor.

Being abusive is not a symptom of ADHD. Its possible that he had ADHD along with a personality disorder. They are NOT the same thing, no matter how many jerks tell you they are.

First educate yourself on ADHD from a valid source and not strangers.

Stop looking for validation from strangers and go get professional help.

SeekingHealing7 profile image
SeekingHealing7

Hello! I'm wondering if you're still looking for someone who understands what you're going through for support. I google "ADHD anger spouse" or something similar and came across your post. I've been with my husband almost 2 decades. He has angry outbursts often and rages so I know it's you feel. When I try to tell others what is like, they don't understand the impact of living with someone who has constant anger outbursts. I think others just think "yeah, we all get angry sometimes and it sucks". But his anger had led me to depression and anxiety although work with a therapist has been really helping. I feel like I'm always walking in a mine field of hidden explosives not sure when the next one will go off, you know? Anyway, just seeing if you're still out there and wanted to talk/support each other. Thank you!

geegeeh profile image
geegeeh in reply to SeekingHealing7

I'm not the original poster, but I am out here and found my way here just as you did, by googling "ADHD spouse angry outbursts". I don't know who I am anymore, living this way, just as you describe, I've become sad, anxious, seeing no hope or joy ahead, and yes, angry.

LondonLdn profile image
LondonLdn in reply to geegeeh

Hello, it seems we have all managed to come to this thread the same way. I've been searching online for some support for ADHD angry husband and until now I haven't found anything remotely suitable. I am having the same problems as others here and really don't know what to do. I have been with my partner for 6 years now - always been aware of his anger but always thought it was situational and it would sort itself out but it is just getting worse. His diagnosis of ADHD seemed to verify his actions and it's now more my fault than ever if something goes wrong.

He can flip out at anything, currently it is if he feels disrespected in any way. He calls me such horrible names, threatens me and has completely changed my personality. I am the same as you @geegeeh- I've become sad, anxious and cannot see a way out , I feel completely trapped. Worst thing is he can be the nicest, sweetest and kindest person on a good day and feels terribly guilty afterwards!

Please feel free to message me if you ever want to talk through anything - in a weird way it has been a relief (although sad for everyone) that other people are going through this same thing.

troyhenn2 profile image
troyhenn2 in reply to LondonLdn

thinking of u, hope it gets better , i also feel like you ,

Margai profile image
Margai in reply to LondonLdn

Hi LondonLdn,

I sent you a private message on here a I'd love to connect if you're still trying to find someone to talk with.

Tormented555 profile image
Tormented555

I can relate to your husband, except I don't abuse anyone but myself. I scare my gf and dog sometimes with my self-imploding rages, maybe that's abusive, I don't know. I just know it makes no sense for me to abuse anyone else when I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that all of my problems are 100% my own fault . For me it's something that just gets worse because every little thing that sets me off, every little screwup or disaster, is not just that one thing, but another addition to thousands or millions of previous screwups, so it just accumulates to the point where any little thing sets me off, because it represents one more failure in an endless sea of failures, and I feel helpless like I keep making the same stupid mistakes and I can't do anything about it except watch myself make them over and over again and it makes me nuts. I have no idea what the solution is, I'd like to know, I'm just saying I can relate. Life just sucks worse and worse and then you die

Traci999 profile image
Traci999

Hi I have exactly the same situation as you! Are you still online on here I really need to discuss and connect x

Margai profile image
Margai

Like others, I am also looking for non ADHD spouses going through the same.

When my spouse is angry it is either resembles a rather childish temper tantrum or it turns into verbal abuse with shouting, extreme criticism, accusations, denigrations, name-calling - and he does not hold back nor is any topic, flaw, characteristic, gender, political stance, conviction, value etc. off limits. It is loud, it is ugly, and it is highly abusive. He can go on for hours if given the opportunity, that is, if I don't walk away and leave him to rage on his own.

I am currently trawling the internet to find others with first-hand experience of this from their ADHD partner. I suspect an ODD comorbidity is part of the picture, but I'm no psychiatrist so it's only a guess based on what I've read.

If anyone is interested in meeting up online, or perhaps forming a small support group, please leave me a private chat message on here.

Newfy25 profile image
Newfy25 in reply to Margai

You have described 100% exactly what i am experiencing too. Latest one was last night and i just feel so hurt and sad after the things he said, implied and called me. Never mind the lies. Brought up very sensitive things about my family and that "my father was right", there was nowhere he missed. The break in trust and the disappointment and sadness that comes with that. I cant see how to get past the things he said. Its like yesterday something happened in me where i feel i cant repair or get past. The last one was four weeks ago, all in public and totally ruined an otherwise lovely and expensive weekend. He has no ability or willingness to see how hurtful and how its taking its toll.

Margai profile image
Margai

Hi Chris,

In case it's still relevant, I sent you a private message on here a I'd love to connect.

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