Fiancé to a adult with adhd - CHADD's Adult ADH...

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Fiancé to a adult with adhd

tyeshamiddleto profile image
6 Replies

I have a fiancé who was diagnosed as a child with adhd I love him for sure and for the last six years I have been trying to deal with his mental issues. Don’t get me wrong I have degrees in social services with other concentrations, so he think it’s an experiment for me. We want our relationship to last but I don’t know what to do when he’s at the highs.

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tyeshamiddleto profile image
tyeshamiddleto
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6 Replies
zaymohsan profile image
zaymohsan

Hi! What difficulties did you find with ADHD fiancé and has he he been diagnosed for ODD aswell?

DGGibbons profile image
DGGibbons

weddings can be tough and having ADHD can add an extra level of "drama" to it if you let it. the best thing you can do is make sure that you are both communicating your concerns to each other. are there specific issues you are having with your fiance?

adhdwife-ML profile image
adhdwife-ML

Hi, my husband has ADHD. It is easy to try to take on the emotions they have because of the love between you too. I have been learning that the only thing I can do is love him through his pain. Before I always tried to find a fix and even still try to do that to this day. I know I will never quit searching for support and research. However, I have learned that I can't take it on, because I will never truly be able to help him alone. All I can do and all I am meant to do is remain. Remain here as someone he can count on. Remain here, as someone who loves him despite his faults. Its hard. But it gets a little easier. If anyone has more advice I would LOVE to hear it and desperately need it as well.

Does he have issues keeping a job?

Is he on medication?

Does he have emotional break downs?

Is he depressed, or say depressive statements?

Curious because of the issues my husband has.

zaymohsan profile image
zaymohsan in reply to adhdwife-ML

Bless you! It’s amazing that you think in such a positive way! I’m I husband was diagnosed with adhd a few months ago and life with his has been very challenging my main issue with him is anger management! He gets violent sometimes :(

adhdwife-ML profile image
adhdwife-ML in reply to zaymohsan

Haha yes its soooooooo challenging some days. My husband has had some of those issues. Ironically, he describes it has irritation from not being able to control his emotions. I know its harder for him than it is for me. That is what I always remind myself. However, he never is violent towards me. He usually tells me to go away or something instead. But we talk about it afterwards and he works on it and those episodes have actually gradually decreased!

zaymohsan profile image
zaymohsan

When violence exists then marriage will suffer! We gonna start anger management classes soon and see how reacts to them! I hope he can learn how to control his anger outbursts because they are dangerous when they develop

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