Help please!!!: Help!my son is 3 yrs... - CHADD's ADHD Pare...

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Help please!!!

Widline profile image
14 Replies

Help!my son is 3 yrs old he is in the spectrum he's in a public school where we have an IEP where he supose to ge speech therapy and OT but he did not get any of it I went to the school every single day talk to them no results we can't afford a private school what do I do please help.😭 I'm so scared I don't know what to do

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Widline profile image
Widline
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14 Replies
Nanchli profile image
Nanchli

hi there, I dont know a whole lot abt how you can incorporate those therapies! But I can share some insight from my experience, My son's school felt the need that he should be on IEP since he started the school and I am glad they felt this way, and we discussed what accomodations will help him succeed in school and PT was a part of it, Does your son's IEP says he will get benefitted from S.therapy and OT. You can have that included in IEP and as far as I know if its a part of IEP. school cant deny that. they should have provided you with IEP and you can check what you all agrees upon and if feel like S.t and OT is not included, you can bring it up to be in included on IEP. For me I didnt know any of this with my son, and even though he hates school and never thrived there but without IEP and other help from school it was IMpossible for him to continue. Wish you luck!

Widline profile image
Widline in reply to Nanchli

Hi there! Thank you for responding he's IEP says he will get benefitted in speech T and OT but the school doesn't have the teacher they said because of covid19 I asked them to sent him to another district they refused I don't know if I should call them in court get a lawyer I don't know what to do

Onthemove1971 profile image
Onthemove1971

If the school did not give him the service they are required to give him "back" or compensation services. I sorry I done have all the details, but they should give him the service. Do you have anyone that can help you with going to the iep? Do you know of a parent group in your area?

Aspen797 profile image
Aspen797

Every state has a federally funded “law office” to protect the rights of people with disabilities, including kids with IEP’s and 504’s. They provide free education, advocacy, and sometimes legal representation . You can find your state’s here: ndrn.org/about/ndrn-member-....

Your state also has a parent resource center that also provides education and advocacy, but no legal help. You can find yours here: parentcenterhub.org/find-yo...

You are a great advocate for your child in pursuing what they need!

Widline profile image
Widline

Thank you I really appreciated all the help

Onthemove1971 profile image
Onthemove1971

Many schools are hiring virtual companies when they do not have the qualified specialist. Maybe that is an option?

Hi, my son apparently is not on a spectrum (he had a multidisciplinary ADOS at age 3.5 - 3 days of group observation and tests etc) however he has had mild sensory stuff going and he needed speech therapy ongoing from toddler until when he was 7 years old. He has had severe - moderate speech sound impairment and had to work with the therapist on speech sound production- pretty much working through the whole alphabet. At age 8 we had him diagnosed with ADHD- I wish we did it when he was 5 (that’s earliest that the doctors would diagnose ADHD in the UK). Many neurodiverse kids have a few things going on for them - for example many kids on the spectrum also have ADHD so medication can really help improve their functioning.

Also do check with your doctor if there are any medications that you can safely give to a child this young to maybe calm him down etc. We are in the UK and here doctors don’t gives any such meds to children younger than 5 but US is more advanced. For example I know from this forum that some doctors prescribe various antihistamines (hay fever medicines) to children of licence to calm them. Parents here on this forum were mentioning Cyproheptadine which is over the counter in many countries, it’s widely used in Canada to increase appetite in children, with a mild sedative effect as a side effect. I did see medical journal articles quoting this given safely to young kids (it’s not a new medicine so it’s well documented safety profile over the years) but you need to ask your doctor.

Also look up on Internet about sensory integration, many children on the spectrum especially when they are little do get sensory overloading or may be ‘sensory seeking’ etc. You can see what calms him and school then should also use it. Does he like rocking like in a hammock (even 2 people getting a large blanket and him jumping in and you guys rock him, he will love it or hate it, depending his sensory profile), or weighted blankets or squiggly toys, biting toys if he needs to chew things, tight body sock etc.

I’d say, for now speech therapy is the most important for your little man. But of course if there are no resources for it then it’s a hard one. We also were doing Makaton sign language with my son since he was 2.5- you can see on YouTube or get a book etc, it’s very easy signs. When my son was very little he was mixing signs and the words that he was able to say into a sentence. When my second son was born and I didn’t know if he was neurodiverse or not (luckily he is not, I think I’d have a breakdown having 2 kids with neurodiversity!) I was using Makaton with him since he was a baby and already when he was 6 months old sitting on a swing in our local park he was singing for me ‘more’ once I was stopping swinging him. Other mums in the park- their eyes were popping out that I have a baby who actually ‘talks’ sign language 😄

Anyway, you don’t need to worry that once you introduce Makaton that your kid will ‘prefer it’. Speech therapist told me that the research shows that every human prefers speech and if they can talk they will talk and that once the child is able to speak they just ditch Makaton. My kids don’t even remember using it😂I wish I had videos of them doing it. I never back then filmed them…

Widline profile image
Widline in reply to

Thank you I will try the Makaton thank u

in reply to Widline

You will have to be super patient with this Makaton (it takes months) and when you do a sign at the same time you always also need to say it. So let’s say if you have your son on a swing and he likes it you then on purpose stop. And then in Makaton you do a sign for more and very expressively you ask him verbally at the same time ‘Do you want more?’ Or just say ‘More?’ Only when he looks at you and replies you start swinging him again. The same at home with his favourite food. The useful signs are ‘Please’, Thank you’, ‘Love you’, ‘loo’, ‘Bath’.

I don’t know where your son is with his speech, but I was also told by the speech therapist to hide all his favourite toys in a way that he wouldn’t be able to get them himself but he would know where they are and he would only be able to get them if he asks. I have ADHD myself and my house is like after a tornado even on a day when I do think I ‘tidied up’ so I never actually did manage to organise his toys this way😂But that was speech therapists idea to make everywhere opportunities for communication and not just guess what he wants and give it to him but always make him communicate. And then always praise him when he does communicate. You can say ‘Good talking.’ So let’s say if he wants a drink- my son when he was 2, 3 years old he was just pointing at whatever he wanted and making some noise (not speech) so the speech therapist said not to give it to him if he just points. So let’s say he points at his cup or tries to reach and take a water bottle so I know he wants a drink. But I would then hold a bottle and not give it to him until he ‘talks’. But then at the same time I model Makaton for ‘drink’ and expressively ask him ‘Do you want a drink?’ And ask him ‘drink’? And repeat the same sign and keep repeating ‘drink’ for drink many times. I mean, it may take weeks/months until he starts signing etc so do give him a drink in the meantime 😉Don’t be embarrassed by doing it, do it in shops and public places. Sometimes parents are embarrassed and don’t want attention from other people, I never cared what other people thought about it. I used to do it even in restaurants, on a tube in London. My son liked his little books to look at them on a tube so I would sign ‘book’ and ask him ‘Do you want your book to read’ and only when he would sign back a sign for ‘book/reading’ I would give it to him.

Jackieedunn profile image
Jackieedunn

Does he have speech and OT officially on his IEP?

If not, put in writing to your district that you would like a speech and OT evaluation.

Widline profile image
Widline in reply to Jackieedunn

Yes, he does I went to the district Yesterday they will send him to another district for speech thank you, everybody,🙏 for all the help

Onthemove1971 profile image
Onthemove1971 in reply to Widline

This is great news! Please work only with the case manager who wrote the IEP and manages his services. The office staff is not qualifies to help you.

NYCmom2 profile image
NYCmom2

Try the resources Aspen797 suggested. Find out what therapies your insurance company might cover and you can supplement outside of school if possible.

Stay on top of the school team and keep insisting firmly but kindly that your child needs their IEP services to begin.

Keep records in a folder, keep track of correspondences in case you need to see an education lawyer at some point.

Booksbooks profile image
Booksbooks

some agencies have parent advocates that know the law and can support you in approaching the school district. For example in the Bay Area of California there is Parents Helping Parents. Perhaps there is one near you that does the same?

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