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Behavioral problems between My family and my daughter.

Miny11 profile image

My daughter is 11 year old and she recently was diagnosed with ADHD and she’s Mexican- American, she has a lot problems with my family, she is trying to understand the culture but for her is really hard.

What can you do in this situation? Can someone related to this? . Please I need some help.

Thank you.

5 Replies

well I can tell you from someone that has ADHD is that take it slow. Not only is it hard to sit for a long period of time but its harder to learn when you dont want to so find what she likes. for example if she likes art then take art and apply it to everything. Take breaks they help. For the problems with the family just let your family know that when she gets upset most the time she just wants to be heard, but that does not mean she should not take responsibility for when she miss behaves. Remember your in charge she is still the child and you are the adult. I hope I helped. Sorry if I did not.

Miny11 profile image
Miny11 in reply to msdraggy

Thank you for the advice:)

Perhaps short culture lessons where she can learn 1 thing about the family and how it responds to certain things. For instance, how do birthday celebrations differ between the two cultures? Maybe let her research the topic with a quick google search. Is there an older relative that she seems to connect with? Perhaps they can share their experiences of their culture with her over a meal, or activity where it's just the two of them. Short but informative discussions may help her learn and possibly draw closer to some of the family. Prayers for wisdom and guidance.

Miny11 profile image
Miny11 in reply to pam4him

Thank you for the advise, I will try one thing at the time, she is my only child.

I love the advice here: so helpful. I am also Mexican American, and I got really excited about sharing a couple customers here and there with my stepson (has adhd) more so for fun so maybe he could connect with me on a different, new level. It can be sort of a toss up between if he’ll actually care enough to listen or be interested. I figured out that he’s starting to enjoy cooking and baking. So I’ll choose a recipe that is near and dear to me and I’ll ask him to help me with it. It takes a lot of patience to keep him focused on the task at hand, but eventually we have a meal that he did a lot of work on that he can be proud of accomplishing, he’s learned about a traditional dish that comes from another culture, and we had some time to connect 1:1.

I can tell you this: learning new things is hard regardless of the person, especially if you’re not used to it. I’m not sure of your situation, but it was exceptionally hard for my brother and sister growing up / they immigrated to the US from Mexico and they had to learn about American culture while trying not to forget about Mexican culture. I came along, and I basically had to learn both cultures simultaneously. And long as it’s approached with love and excitement, learning these differing cultures can be exciting for a child. What’s not exciting, is feeling like an outsider or like you don’t really “fit in”. That may come up even more so if you have ADHD. Try to always reiterate that these are things done or learned about to bring the family closer and if there’s something she does not enjoy doing / don’t put the importance on the negative part. Acknowledging the a certain thing is not enjoyable will help her feel heard but they doesn’t mean you have to give up. Just move on and continue modeling positivity.

No idea if that was helpful ! I hope something was.

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