Hello

[ADHDMomma1]

My son is 7 and has been on Quillivent now for 6 months and is doing great but my husband(his father) is fighting him taking medication at all. It was a struggle for my son for years (probably could have been diagnosed at 5). Dad just thinks he needs to not rely on medication and wants him to just focus. I have tried to explain that it is a disease just like hypertension but because it is psych he thinks it is just a matter of will. Help!

[Onthemove1971]

Even better if he had a child with vision problems would he get them glasses.

Also, school, life gets much harder and he needs to be stable with supports in order to be successful.

Maybe show him the research that shows that children with ADHD who take medication are less likely to: use illegal drugs during teen years, do crime as they grow up and recently they showed they don't fall and hurt themselves ( clearly becuase they are not impulsive) as much. Great job at supporting your son. You have worked hard.

We are always here for you.

[ADHD_DAD]

Hi. If you read these posts, you will see that plenty of parents feel like your son's dad, at least at first. What I will say is that I doubt that this is the only time that you and dad will disagree about what is best for your son. Your son is lucky to have 2 parents who care about him. Your ADHD journey will involve a lot of trial and error and while you'll feel guilty for the "errors," they are unlikely to do him any real harm. It sounds like you believe that you are on the right track and that the dad thinks he is. It could be that neither or both of you is/are right or that the "truth" lies somewhere in the middle. Replace "matter of will" with "behavior modification" and you will find plenty of folks in this group who advocate rather strongly for it. Maybe your solution is a combination of meds and "behavior modification" which incorporates both your thoughts and the dad's. Your son is a lucky boy to have 2 parents who care about him and want to help him manage his ADHD. And he's only 7! There's time to try different "treatments." There is value in finding a way to manage it that both parents can live with because The ADHD isn't going anywhere. Good luck

[Pennywink]

My husband was also deadest against medication - it isn’t uncommon for one parent to be.

What helped us was:

1. Bringing my husband to all appointments with doctors & teachers, and including him in all communications with them. This helped as he was able to ask all the questions he needed, and he has a harder time refuting them than he does me.

2. Incorporating some of my husband’s suggestions & not cutting him out of all decision making, even if I suspected those suggestions weren’t going to work.

We also approached medication like a trial, though if you’ve already been giving it for 6 months, or hat suggestion may not help you. Seeing my son’s quality of life (not just ours) improve with medication is what ultimately sold my husband on it.

I definitely encourage adding accommodations at home to enable your son to become more independent, but 7 may be a little young to insist he do it without medication.

[ADHDMomma1 in reply to Pennywink]

Thanks for the support. We have been doing a lot of behavior modifications at home and school. Luckily he goes to a Montessori program and so is able to get up and move around a lot throughout the day. He does not get any screen time except on weekends and is on a low sugar diet.