How to make family time at the holida... - CHADD's ADHD Pare...

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How to make family time at the holidays less stressful - help!

MaudQ
MaudQ

Looking ahead at the upcoming week and I’m wondering if there anything I can do to make all our lives easier. When we are visiting my family we have a lot of difficulty around meals. My mom is anxious and disorganized, my brother has ADHD and my dad is anxious too. And my daughter has anxiety/ADHD which we are managing through talk therapy, accommodations at home and medication. Everyone is supportive and on board - it’s more that their own issues get in the way. So meals are complicated and late and then my dad freaks out about table manners and so on. Any thoughts?

3 Replies
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Hidden
Hidden

So, I'm just not. Luckily I don't have a ton of relatives, but I just let them know that we can only come for dessert or for a little while before dinner. We're having dinner with my Dad, which should take about 45 minutes since he's such a marvelous communicator. We talked about it in counseling and both of us just want to chill. I can only imagine the tension if everyone else was so anxious and my daughter yelled out "I AM LEAVING!" and then threw herself on the floor. Nope.

Alliea79
Alliea79
in reply to Hidden

I may be still half asleep but this time of year, I am secretly a little sad I’m not able to bring myself to simply let everyone know that I am done and must go, no reason or anything provided. Mic drop.

Keep the meal simple, as short as possible, and review the areas (e.g. manners) that may cause anxiety with your daughter beforehand to try and avert any issues with your parents. Maybe you can rehearse/practice ahead of time some ways to respond to potential issues that may arise. Are there soothing actions/tools/items that your daughter can use to reduce her anxiety? Keep in mind that it's one meal, and if things aren't going well, you can always leave. Wishing you all the best!

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