Self-defeating attitude & Medication

[MissOz]

Hello everyone,

As I write this, I’m afraid my 6 year-old might be in the 20% group where medication is not very effective.

We have only tried Ritalin so far. At first 5mg in the morning and 5mg at 12:00. Teachers saw little improvement. Now we are trying Ritalin SA 20mg (sustained action). She’s still on vacation so I’m doing this to see with my own eyes the difference in behavior while on Ritalin SA.

I compare her willingness to read - one book of 5 pages, one sentence, or even one word, to showing a cross and garlic to a vampire! Pure terror, agitation, anger, followed by frustration. She says - why do you want me to read everyday, everyday, everyday?!! I want to color.... she’s does end up reading. She knows how, but not after a draining plead!

Her self-defeating attitude towards anything that requires any level of difficulty at all is very frustrating. Not only academically, a challenging board game, a puzzle, a question.... At swimming classes for instance, she does great on her own, until the teacher tells her to swim backwards, and hold the board a certain way and she is done. I can’t, I can’t, I can’t, I don’t know how....

Also, the medicine doesn’t help at all in her concentration to communicate. She truly cannot carry on a back and forth conversation.... I heard that medications for ADHD don’t work as well for kids in the spectrum. Although she doesn’t have a diagnosis for ASD, could this lack of medication effectiveness, and self-defeat be signs that I should be focusing elsewhere?

[capriwms1]

I completely understand your frustration. Have you tried comic books? I take my son to Barnes & Noble to pick out fun books that he wants to read. My son reads above his grade level so I tried to find comic books (not magazines) that are for older kids but appropriate. I did the same for my daughter when she was little and she doesn’t have ADHD. For me, reading is reading and I try to relieve the pressure by meeting him half way.

As far as games, what about connect four, tic tax toe, or card games like Uno or Go Fish? They usually don’t take as long.

When it comes to swimming, I would try to reverse your child’s thought. When she says, I can’t. I would say, well let me see what you’re saying you can’t do so we can try to figure out if you should do it. That usually stumps my son into showing me only to prove his point lol

[MissOz in reply to capriwms1]

Thanks. I’ll try comic books. Thanks for the tips!

[Onthemove1971]

MissOz-

Welcome to the group. A few things are you guys working with a counselor to help her learn how to deal with the many overwhelming issues that children with ADHD have to deal with? Second are you working with a child psychiatrist? They are Specialist who can assist you in knowing what type of medications work best for each individual child.

Now having said that, the hard to swallow part... I learned that medication can only control %60 of behavior when it's the correct dose and taken right way. The other %40 has to be behavior modification.

In the past when I am judging if a new medication is working, or changing doses I don't judge things off one event. I look at the entire day r two days and the willingness and ability to function.

ADHD medications are giving for impulse control (Ritilin) or an additional medication for focus.

My child takes one for impuse control and one for focus. If I asked him to do any non preferred activity, I am sure I would get a negative reaction. But if I gave him 30 min of fortnite for 30 min. of reading he would read for 1 hour with bells on... ( just an example)

A very large part of having ADHD is a lack of the ability to control your emotions.

Hope this helps explain this a little.

Best of luck in finding the correct medication. Please don't give up to soon.

[MissOz in reply to Onthemove1971]

Thank you. We have an appointment with a neuro-pediatrician in a week.

[Pug414]

I would add to the other excellent comments that medication is a trial and error until you find the right dose/Med/combination. It’s a journey. In addition, once you find the correct dosing for your child at this age, it could even need adjusting with hormonal changes such as puberty. Also, there could even be other underlying issues that haven’t been whittled out. For example, my son was doing much better when he started a stimulant medication but was still having emotional responses that didn’t correlate with the event. It turns out he also has anxiety. Once we treated that aspect, he became much more balanced. Every child is different. The combination of therapy, medication, and parent training is what has helped my family the most. (We are a family of 6 with raging adhd, anxiety, mood disorders and going strong!!) keep up the good work and be patient. It takes time. One other tip is catch her when she’s doing the behavior you want to see. For example: wow I know that must have been difficult for you and you handled it so well! Try to remember the good feeling you have when you overcome something hard.

[MissOz]

Yes. I almost certain she has anxiety. She had an evaluation for ADHD, and I will see a psychologist and neuro in the following weeks.