Adhd and odd: I have to yr old son he... - CHADD's ADHD Pare...

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Adhd and odd

mzcasteel17 profile image
20 Replies

I have to yr old son he has been going through mental health services since he was about 3 and at that time he was diagnosed with ODD,PTSD,RAD, and ADHD. He has been on meds for the ADHD since he was 3 he started on Adderall but didn't do any good.. I thought things would get better as he got older but boy was I wrong. This past year our whole family has been to hell and back. After being told my son had ADHD for 7 years I was told he was missed diagnosed. So as of October 2017 my step daughter moved in and they had started y son on depakote 250 mg. He started having suicidal thoughts he was seeing things that weren't there and he was beating the hell out of myself, me and his 11 year old sister. I called the cops several times and that didn't do any good they told me I wasn't being a parent and it was my fault. Well fall break was my breaking point he sat in front of me telling me he didn't wanna be alive I was the reason he wanted to kill himself I messed his life up and he repeatedly kept punching himself in the face over and over.. the whole left side of his was bruised and swollen and remind you this is a child that was 8 at the time. So come beginning of December I signed him into a mental hospital by the name of Cumberland hall. They told me he would be there 3-5 days he was there for 2 weeks and had him court ordered after a nurse was beating on him.. when he came home they had him on 75 mg of Seroquel and that's enough to knock a grown man down.. but ever since he has came home my son is gone that hospital did something to him and I want my little boy back.. he's hateful towards everyone treats everyone like a dog screams and yells at me tells me I'm not his mom.. pretty much does what ever he wants and has no regrad for anyone but himself he lies about everything he plays the victim everything something happens and after being in that hospital for 2 weeks I had to put him in another one by the name of river valley he was there 3 days still no difference. And then he can't been on meds or spoken to anyone since February of this year no doctor or therapist wanted to deal with him or knew how but today I finally found a doctor at Deaconess hospital and she wants him to start on Vyvanse and intuniv so I'm waiting on a PA and for the other to be stocked. But he has been diagnosed with

ADHD

ODD

PTSD

RAD

PHYCIOS

BI POLAR

MOOD DISRUPTION DISORDER

ANXIETY

since the age of 2 and the list keeps getting longer.. so please give me any advice or comments u have to help me or him thank u for ur time and for reading my story

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mzcasteel17
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20 Replies
Pennywink profile image
Pennywink

Wow - I am so sorry to hear what you, your family, and your son are suffering through. Honestly, I don’t know how my usual ADHD advice would interplay with the other conditions, or how to handle those. I have a friend who has 3 children with RAD - and I know dealing with my son's ADHD / TS is nothing compared to what her family deals with.

Maybe a therapist for you who specializes in these conditions and can provide parent training would be helpful. ADHD and ODD benefit from specific parenting techniques, and adding RAD takes that to a whole new level. (My son really needs a LOT of praise. Reactions to his behavior, praise or discipline, need to be calm and swift, though not necessarily severe. We also accommodate with a lot of signs, checklists, posted schedules, analog clocks, to make up for some of his deficits.)

If your son was adopted, does the adoption agency have any resources or recommendations? I’d also advise heavily researching the conditions yourself, finding trustworthy sources.

Otherwise, I hope you find a ways to also take care of yourself. I’ll be praying for you & your family.

mzcasteel17 profile image
mzcasteel17 in reply to Pennywink

Thank u and yes it is hard really hard there's days I wanna give up but I can't.. and no he is not adopted he is MY biological son and when he was diagnosed with rad and I looked into I couldn't see how my son could or would have it I still don't til this day. I'm just trying to see if there's other things I can do because if not my only other choice before I lose everything including my house and family is to go to the courts and file beyond parental control papers and he could go to juve at 9 and that's not what I want

Mmagusin profile image
Mmagusin

Is dad in his life? It's always better to have help! I'm shocked to hear that he was diagnosed so early in life, at 2 and medicated. The drugs you describe are very powerful. Depakote is particularly bad for side effects. I hope he gets the help he needs

mzcasteel17 profile image
mzcasteel17 in reply to Mmagusin

My husband his stepfather has been here for the last 4 years but as far as his real dad. He didn't want anything to do with Jimmy he hasn't been around since he was about one n a half he has tried to contact his real father and he blocks him on everything I think maybe that has something to do with his attitude toward my husband and also they say it was his real father's fault mainly for the problems cuz he beat on me day in and day out and NY sonwasmy security blanket thinking it would stop it but it never did. So the doctors say he was traumatized at an early age and does what he seen. And what's even more sad is I went threw it for 10 years and my son acting the way he is it's like I'm reliving the pain everyday if that makes any since. And thank u I really appreciate u taking time to read and comment and I hope he gets the help he needs as well it long over due

ADHDmetoo profile image
ADHDmetoo in reply to mzcasteel17

Have you tried cbd oil?

MamaPajama profile image
MamaPajama in reply to ADHDmetoo

Please don’t prey on this mom with an MLM scheme product! That is beyond pathetic!

mzcasteel17 profile image
mzcasteel17 in reply to MamaPajama

Ok I didn't even know what that meant i had to Google it.. I'm not here for a pitty party or for the negative comments. So if that's how u feel keep on moving u didnt have to stop and read my post but I know there is others out there dealing with the same thing so thank u and have a good day

MamaPajama profile image
MamaPajama in reply to mzcasteel17

Mzcasteel, I was responding to ADHDmetoo who had suggest an MLM/pyrimid scheme product, CBD oil, to “help” you. Believe me, I am 100% in support of all parents and caregivers on these boards. I do not however support soliciting parents/caregivers who are vulnerable and seeking support. Sorry if you misunderstood, but that comment was not directed toward you.

ADHDmetoo profile image
ADHDmetoo in reply to MamaPajama

Wow. I have no company. I'm a mom of a son that has adhd. I also have found out that I have adhd. We are both trying cbd oil which is NOT a company. It's a component of cannabis so you can just chill the heck out!

MamaPajama profile image
MamaPajama in reply to ADHDmetoo

So lets say that OP would want to “try” CBD oil. You wouldn’t provide her with a link to a site for more info? Or add her to an online/FB group where she can learn more? Would you profit in any way if someone bought CBD oil under you?

Not that the OP was looking for remedies...maybe you could have read her post and offered a listening ear, or some understanding, instead of a soft sales pitch.

ADHDmetoo profile image
ADHDmetoo in reply to MamaPajama

No!

Pennywink profile image
Pennywink in reply to ADHDmetoo

It’s a scheme that comes up frequently in this forum - usually in disguise of people asking about it or offering suggestions. My apologies if we are a little sensitive to other people mentioning it.

ADHDmetoo profile image
ADHDmetoo in reply to Pennywink

Ok well I've never heard of that. But I have no affiliation with any company. Like I said.

Pajamasam36 profile image
Pajamasam36

My dear friend ,

I calm you friend because I feel your pain and empathize with your situation. I have an adopted son with ADHD, ODD, Tourettes, Anxiety disorder, centers nervous system disorder, RADS and fetal alcohol syndrome. My son is on 4 brain Meds and has been for five years. It has taken many adjustments to get Meds to benifit my boy.

He has talk therapy with a psychologist weekly, social skills group with a group of kids at the life sills clinic for his Tourettes. He also receives C-bit

( comprehensive behavior intervention for tics)where he learns competitive responses to replace his swearing and inappropriate shout outs.

The most difficult part of my journey is getting him a public education. It has been horrible and involved many lawyers for years.

Is there anyone in your sons life that he trusts? Does he have things he enjoys? Is he responding to any one positively? Do you attend church? Have you checked into DPSD? Google it! There are government services available to help your boy and your family.

We have respite care where an employee comes into our home and takes my son to all his many appointments. It makes my relationship with my son as his mother better because I am not the primary care giver of his academics as well as his therapy apts.

I pray you will find relief. You need to go to church and counseling as well. These two avenues of relief are very helpful to me. Even if people at church don’t understand I have my savior Jesus Christ who does. I will pray for you and your boy! You are not Alone! ❤️

Lostmama profile image
Lostmama

Have they ever tried an MRI? I once read an article about a kid who had similar thoughts and actions and it turned out to be a brain tumor. I wish I could remember the name of the article but this was years ago

Pennywink profile image
Pennywink

You are so strong to go through what you have, and still be fighting for your son. I hope your new partner shows you the kindness and respect you deserve.

It sounds like your doctor is trying to address the ADHD first & see if that helps everything else. Treating ADHD does frequently benefit ODD symptoms as well. So, here are things I wish our pediatrician would have given me upon first ADHD diagnosis. Hopefully they are a help:

This video is long, but soooooo good:

youtu.be/SCAGc-rkIfo

A list of school accommodations, but adapting them at home has been a game changer for us:

russellbarkley.org/factshee...

This is aimed at teens, but really sets the tone for establishing an emotional connection with your child. I realize the RAD diagnosis may change this, but if he is your biological son & you are skeptical of the diagnosis, then maybe it can help. And like a previous poster said, finding SOME trusted adult for your son is really key, in my opinion. If he won’t bond with you, then maybe someone else:

additudemag.com/manage-your...

(Barkley has some great books on ADHD and ODD.)

I don’t want to overwhelm you worth info, especially as they may not address other concerns you are dealing with. But I definitely have more recommendations if you get through it all & find it valuable.

MessyBrilliance profile image
MessyBrilliance

My oldest son witnesssed domestic violence and experience neglect when he was very young and was extremely traumatized from it. He experienced many of the same symptoms and would even rage at me - bearing his teeth and growling. I had him hospitalized in third grade for almost two weeks because of suicidal thoughts. He was diagnosed with a mood disorder and they prescribed him an antipsychotic and an antidepressant. Nothing seemed to help.

My son’s rage would trigger my fears of my ex husband so I would verbally strike out at him to “protect” myself.

We were both in therapy at Genesis Women’s Outreach Center for domestic violence and that saved our lives. They provided free play therapy for my son and understood that the effects of early childhood trauma can often look the same as ADHD, ODD, mood disorder etc. and that children with ptsd are often misdiagnosed. They also helped me learn to overcome my fears.

My son is now a healthy, happy 13 year old who smiles and hugs me. I thought this would never happen. I am finally able to take care of myself in ways that are healthy and do not harm him emotionally.

Urge you to seek domestic violence counseling even though you are no longer in the situation; it sounds like it is still with you both. It will take a lot of hard work with many ups and downs but you will get there. Sending lots of love your way! Hope this helps :)

MessyBrilliance profile image
MessyBrilliance

Oops, I must have misread your post. You didn’t mention a domestic violence situation. Sorry about that. Hope you find what works for your family.

mzcasteel17 profile image
mzcasteel17 in reply to MessyBrilliance

No there was domestic vilcence with my son's real father and my son was y security blanket thinking it would stop it but it didn't but his father hasn't been around since he was 2

MessyBrilliance profile image
MessyBrilliance in reply to mzcasteel17

It may be worth exploring because his symptoms are so close to my sons. (I’m actually on this site for my younger son who has adhd but read your post and had to reach out to you.) There may have been more of an impact than you think to his core sense of trust, stability, love etc. even at such a young age. My son was 1 1/2 when most of the damage was done and was out of control by the age of 4.

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