Struggling with behavior

[AndreaD011312108]

I have a 9 year old son with ADHD I found this group online resurching support groups for kids with ADHD. My son is on medication and it is helping for the most part. We still struggling with some behavior issues for example I told him he had to go to the doctor for a checkup as I know last minute things can go really bad for any child he just melted down said he was not going screaming that he did not want to go and is kicking doors and walls does anyone have any advice

[ADHDMomto2]

What does he love? I would try and focus on rewarding his good behaviour. Maybe if he goes and does well he gets ice cream, a new book, an extra hour of screen time??.....etc. Also, be firm and state your expectation clearly. You can fight and kick all you want but we will be going to the doctor and i expect you to be kind while we are there. Doctors are an important part of making sure we are healthy......

My son is extremely difficult and I just joined this group now. I certainly don't have the right answer as I am really struggling myself. My son does great on medication. When it wears off, it is very difficult for the whole family.

[AndreaD011312108 in reply to ADHDMomto2]

That's vary Good advice I will use those thank you so much my son does well on his meds but like you when it wears off it's pretty bad but because he is so light they can not up his dose and I'm not sure I would want them to I do not like giving alot of meds but if he needs it I will do it

[Mysticalnyc]

I too have a 10 year old daughter with very similar behaviors. Last minute news always goes bad but sometimes it happens. I’m no expert and in this group to learn from others and also get support from moms like you going thru the challenges. Have you had him screened for any mood disorders? I discovered this with my daughter recently. When they have their melt downs you kinda just have to let them go thru it. Trying to stop it while it’s happening is almost impossible. What’s worked for me is knowing key triggers and avoiding them. Also, thinking ahead all the time to prevent impulse explosions. Yes, it feels like you’re waking on egg shells sndnit can get exhausting but if you don’t plan ahead to prevent the outcomes can be worse. But sometimes this doesn’t even work. If they’re tired, hungry or meds have worn off, just letting them get thru the tantrum may be the only choice.

[AndreaD011312108 in reply to Mysticalnyc]

That is also vary good advice I do try to let him work through it on his own but when he hits or kicks or throws things I do try to stop those things it is rough for me to notice any triggers because it happens so often he is doing much better in school but here at the house it's different I have five sons and 3 with special needs my 12 year old is doing good but he has apergers and my 11 year old I gave custody to his dad because he is a wonderful father I see him every weekend and anytime I pretty much want to but he has a anger disorder I can't think of the name of it but he needed one on one and his dad was able to do that more then I could have but dealing with my 9 year old has been the hardest yet I will be looking to triggers thank you so much for you advice I really appreciate the help

[AndreaD011312108 in reply to AndreaD011312108]

Oh I forgot to answer he does have trouble regulating his emotions I work with a girl who has ADHD and she said alot of it is impulse actions they do things but don't know why they do them and that is what he does he will get mad and hit his brothers I will ask him why he did that and he will say I don't know I try and get him to tell me how he was feeling I will ask was you mad angry or sad sometimes he will answer me and sometimes he will say I don't know