Hi I am new here

[lily49]

Hi I am new here!

I am hoping to get some support with my “issues” that no health provider seems to be able to get to grips with, because they seem relatively minor and trivial, but in the bigger picture, they are Not. A bit like the Chinese Water torture, e.g., lots of little drips eventually getting to you!

I am very anxious inside because of a relative’s health, which they will Not discuss, so it is “The elephant in the room” scenario .I have to pretend it doesn’t exist!

I have no close relatives or friend to chat to, and although I used to walk a lot in the past, I have had to limit what I can now do because of bunions, and sore skin~(most fabrics chafe and irritate my skin, so i cannot walk as far or as often as I would like.)

So lots of days i feel quite low and isolated.

[Hidden]

Hi lily49 and welcome to our forum! We're happy that you've found us. A lot of us here have problems of one kind or another - me included! It sounds like you're having a rough time just now - commiserations. The Active10 programme is really good for people with problems walking as you are building up to walking briskly for just 10 minutes three times a day. Right now I'm at 7 minutes and it's take me a few months to get here! You sound like your mood is quite low too at the moment and getting out in the fresh air really seems to help lift it, so if you can get out for just a few minutes you may find it helps! Have you thought about joining a "talking" group via your GP? Perhaps you would feel less isolated if you had people to talk to? Good luck!

[lily49 in reply to Hidden]

Hi ,thanks for your reply.

I used to walk every day, and for several hours at the weekend, in the counrtyside ,so I Can walk long distances, (but no now!)

I had me feet assessed about 10 years ago, and was diagnosed with bunions, and given the option of surgery, or orthotic inserts. I have a pal who had hers operated on a few years earlier than when I had my consulatation, and she is now back to square one with her own feet.

I went to see the orthotic clinic people, and was given inserts, and now have to wear Horrid ugly shoes~(I have had to give away all my collection of fabulous footwear ,it broke my heart!) I was advised by several of the clinic team Not to have the operation, as the majority of their patients are re- referrals for failed surgery, or a return to their original foot condition after several years, due to their own skeleton design.

I have apparently reached the limit of the help they can give me with the shoe inserts, as there are no more “strengths”~ (for want of a better description)~ to give me.

Cannot find any shoes that fit, or look Anywhere decent. (I Hate the “Granny Options” I am shown in the shops. I Am Avery trendy stylish person in my clothes and outlook!!!!) Even my walking boots hurt my feet now. Have a large garden that is my hobby, so I have to choose if I walk or garden, as my gardening boots hurt my feet so much after about half an hour, that I cannot put my walking boots on the next day! I am in a dilemma with it all!

Have had my limit of CBT sessions last year ~(quite helpful at the time, but failed to address my “Elephant in the room “ scenario regarding a family member’s ill- health and denial of it.) All I was told( in a nut shell,) was “distance yourself from the situation by doing others things,” and “will this situation matter in 5 years time” ,to which my reply was ~”no,t it will be Far Worse!” I have joined a local interest group to get me out of the house a couple of times month, but they don’t really “rock my boat,”as it were, and I only go because it Does get me out of the house!

I have Very few friends, and they are all so Very busy,i hardly ever get to see them.

So I hope you can see the situation I am in?

[Hidden in reply to lily49]

I absolutely can! I walk with the help of a walking aid - a Sholley. It looks like a shopping trolley but stabilises me if I trip, even when empty. Such a bonus for me, as I have a penchant for falling! My problem is with the spine and just on the off chance it may help you, I took to wearing crocs some years ago now - I have them in loads of styles, as they help a lot with spinal alignment. They are also very wide, light weight and comfy. Maybe they could help you, especially for gardening? When I was feeling really down some years ago I took to calling Silverline (especially in the early hours when my demons worried me!), they are available 24 hours a day 0800 470 8090. It's anonymous and they will listen to your problems in total confidence. I do so hope you feel better soon.x

[lily49 in reply to Hidden]

sorry to be so negative, after all the lovely suggestions, but I have to wear insole,so crocs are No Good, also the are plastic,I have to wear leather (another “problem” i have with my skin issues!)I can’t use the phone as “walls have ears” if you understand me, and my mobile is for emergencies only ,so no call times on it for lengthy calls

[runswithdogs]

Welcome. Sounds like you're in a tricky spot with everything that's going on. I know I like to get out and walk my thoughts out, and I have in the past been in a place where I wasn't really able to do that.

If you can't walk long, perhaps you can just add more short little walks in. Another thought might be to try pool walking. No shoes required, and it's good exercise and easy on the joints.

I don't know what the medical system is like where you live, but is there an option to talk with a psychologist or social worker about your current state? I saw one for a handful of sessions on dealing with my own health issues and I found it very valuable and a good use of my time. I had to go private for it though.

[suryakaizen]

Dear lily49, welcome here! Most of us started out here like you- not knowing where to go for advice which is not just medical, or for support in other ways. I joined Health Unlocked when my 34-year old daughter was diagnosed with breast cancer and diabetes 2 years ago. I visit this forum almost every day because these are my friends and fellow travellers, some struggling with basic issues like getting out of bed without pain, walking even a bit like kay50, being active despite arthritis like me, or trying to lose weight in the midst of recovery post-surgery...

Our issues may be small to healthcare providers, but for us, they are very real, so I do not doubt that the small stuff can be like Chinese torture as you said!

I’m reminded of a song I learnt when I was in Canada 20 years ago and I want to quote it for you here (wish I could sing it as I live singing):

“Come sing a song with me (3)

That I might know your mind

And I’ll bring you hope

When hope is hard to find

And I’ll bring a song of love

And a rose in the wintertime”

Keep coming every day for a bit, post how you’re feeling each day, and you may find more resonances than you imagined.

My apologies for such a long post, but here’s hoping to be part of making you feel more connected.

[Realfoodieclub]

Welcome to our little forum. We have many different levels of walker here and we will do everything we can to support you and you getting back to walking. Last year I donated my kidney to my husband but before that we had a good few years coping with ill health in the house. I found that being able to get out the house for whatever time I could mange was my life saver, it just gave me time to gather myself and make me stronger. Are there any benches or seats near you house. I’m thinking of short walks you could do, maybe take a little flask with you for a drink, just a little me time that you could start with then over time move the goals post and make the walk longer. Building up walking is done very slowly and if you don’t go for massive increases just a couple of minutes at a time you will be surprised how far you will be able to walk this time next year. These sort of walks can also be done in high streets of shopping centres, walk don’t have to be outdoors to start with. Have a word with your gp and say you need help with your feet. Hopefully they help to get you feet more comfortable. If you say you need to walk to get fit they should be able to see what you need to help.