Am I a fraudster ?
Good morning , I have been battling with my feelings for about 4 years, what started out as just feeling a little low has now progressed into what I believe to be depression, but when I read some of the posts on here and I see how some people are suffering much more than I appear to be I feel that I am a fraudster.
My state of mind has got so bad that I have finally plucked up the courage to see my GP. I have virtually cut off all my friends and relatives, I prefer to sit on my own at home, my poor wife has finally given up on me because I just will not discuss any of my problems with her, my colleagues at work steer well clear of me because I am so irritable my attention span and short term memory are virtually nil. Last year I was admitted to hospital with a small lump on my testical, which turned out to be nothing serious. However for the short period I felt if it was serious this could be my escape from the way I feel mentally. Up until this point I had never spent the night in hospital I was even born at home, however I felt safe there and even yearned to go back in.
Although I have no intention of committing suicide the thought of dying does give me some feeling of relief. But I just get the feeling that I need to get a grip and shake this off and stop wasting peoples time.
Any advice would be appreciated