I am 53 today. My 3 kids woke me up with a birthday cake and had even managed to light the candles without setting fire to the house. Bless them.
My wife, who left us in January, had said that she would like to take me for lunch on my birthday. Hoping for a tiny first step towards some reconciliation I happily booked a table. She then sent me a text wanting to change the time of our lunch date because she had booked a conference call this afternoon. Didn't even bother to wish me a happy birthday. I sent back a message suggesting we did it some other time as she is so busy.
She'd at least got the kids to wrap some presents for me - a movie DVD that I've already seen, a book that I've already read and some chocolates that I don't particularly like.
I am staggered that after 15 years of loving her and giving everything I had to help her happiness, (to the extent that I made myself ill with depression) she now cares so little. Rather than make any attempt to understand my depression and help me through it she has turned her back on me and the children and seems to see us as an inconvenient obstacle to her living an independent life. I've just had my first big weep in a month, I thought the sertraline was working but I can't see past my misery today.
I have never felt so low, so old or so pointless. Sharing this in the hope that it will be cathartic and I can get myself together before the kids come out of school. They deserve better than me.