I'm 15 and for the past 4 or 5 so months I have been feeling very down, but even more recently it's effecting everything that i once thought was my life. I've taken online tests and they all have said that I have symptoms of it.
There's no one I can talk too and I don't think I can see a doctor without a parent as I'm underage, but I can't talk to anyone in my family, they wouldn't understand and would just have a go at me. My school work is going down hill and I don't have any friends that care enough to notice, I just constantly feel alone.
I have had suicidal thoughts and have attempted once before, after that I've come to the realisation that even though I do want to die, I don't, but I'm just finding it hard to finding a reason to stay considering I'm stupid, alone and all the other bad things I could just think of.
I do cut but not daily, I stopped recently for a month but then something just triggered in me and i started again, it's a sense of release more so than anything.
I don't know what to do or even if I have anything, or if it's just a phase I'm going through.. But if it is, it's becoming to be a really long phase which is effecting my whole life, my school work, my attitude, my weight (which is the only thing that has been upgraded), my moods, my behaviour and my want to do and need to do things. Usually, I'm just inside the house, not doing what most 15 year olds would be doing.
Anything would be great.