i wonder if anyone feels empty like me?
i think i'm depressed now but i often am and don't mind it because i get to feel something other than calm or angry with frequent panic attacks
i don't like to talk to people and do my best not to be noticeable i stop conversations quickly, don't think "i" have talked to anyone for years, i try to work people out so i can attempt to reflect back at them.
the thought of people knowing stuff about me makes me panic although i don't really do anything anyway
the thought of people talking about me makes me panic
people phoning me makes me panic
when i panic i hide or get angry
i hurt myself a lot
i feel removed from myself
am unable to talk to people
i haven't seen a doctor since being prescribed prozac about 12 yrs ago
that was awful and made me worse
i don't even know if i should be on this site
i don't really exist apart from an ache i can't find
i'm just what i created to deflect people
don't really know what to do, i got a appointment to see the doctor but expect he'll just fob me off because i'm incapable of getting my thoughts across to people in person