How do you get through christmas? - Mental Health Sup...

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How do you get through christmas?

emms profile image
emms
16 Replies

I am really wishing there was a way to get rid of christmas, I know its silly, but I dont feel like I will be able to cope with it. I am absolutely dreading it.I just want to hide

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emms profile image
emms
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16 Replies
missrat profile image
missrat

I'm sorry you feel like this, as so many do. It is a difficult time financially, especially in the current economic climate, and is very hard for those who have lost family members or suffered family difficulties in the year - or who have no close family (like me).

Fortunately I have managed to book a few days away - although not for New Year, because of finance. I do have an active faith, so this Christian Houseparty will be good. I'll see the New Year in with - my pet rats!

Ann

emms profile image
emms

My best friend, Rosie, was a rat. When my boyfriend died, I only had her, I felt really close to her

Playing1 profile image
Playing1

Hi Emms,

What's the situation for you at Christmas, are you with family or on your own?

emms profile image
emms in reply to Playing1

I dont know yet. I will probably go to visit my boyfriends grave. But I am not looking forward to it

Hi

I don't have any answers. Like you I just want to curl up in a ball and wait until Christmas has passed. It's a difficult time for anyone without family or friends. Perhaps all we can do is come and write hear if things get too bad. I'll probably get myself quietly drunk and sleep most of the afternoon then watch some subbishy dvds or similar, just waiting for the days to pass so the world gets back to normal. It would be lovely to have family around, Christmases were great when the children were little but now there's just me in one room my husband in another (he's deaf, needs headphones to hear the TV and likes different programmes anyway). It's all so sad.

You and me both will hide away as will many other people.xx

Optimistic9 profile image
Optimistic9

I am also feeling a bit like you. Im sick of all the adverts on tv making xmas look perfect. So many people will be struggling this year due to the recession and also people will get into debt. It should not be like this at all. Dont worry, Youre not alone. Do something like the shoebox appeal, it may make you feel better. Some kids get absolutely nothing and I find that helping those less fortunate is very rewarding

anothernolan profile image
anothernolan in reply to Optimistic9

Thats called a lght at the end of the tunnel for some,...." Admirable I do believe we get back ten fold what we give out..... I admire your energy.... xx

ToniaMarie35 profile image
ToniaMarie35

Xmas can be a hard time to deal, I hate it personally, great for the kids...but it has become way too commercialized also. I use to enjoy it when both sides of my family were close, and I had one boyfriend of 6 years that broke up with me twice...the first just before Xmas and the 2nd just after Xmas, think that really turned me. My new boyfriend doesn't really like it either, both of us are just glad to have it over with, money racket. and it's very hard financially, both of us are going through a rough time with money too..and when u don't feel well u just wish it away. Try to find somebody or some people to be around, talking is great too, go to a gym, become part of a group...just try to keep ur time occupied and I know it's easier said than done believe me. Wishing all of u on here the best and things will get better a bit each day:)

Hecter profile image
Hecter

I too hate Christmas.I will watch DVDs instead of TV to avoid the so called Christmas cheer and listen to CDs I like.Yes I probably will be sat at my computer writing on this site.I will just keep myself to myself and have some nice things to eat and drink.Havent got any advice though

ellabella profile image
ellabella

I'm Baa Humbug as well! This years Christmas dread started kicking in and I just rebelled. No more bloody cringing and crying for things I can't do anymore! How can you buy everybody something? you can't without going into debt. Unless you are very well off... I think it's a pain in the butt. Christmas is one day!! not 2 weeks!!! I am lucky enough to have a family but I live on my own. I have 6 grand kids aged 7-23! so I have explained to the others I will buy the 2 little ones presents and nice cards for everyone else and NOT to buy me anything either! I think we can all do without all the guilt ! Yes we will share a meal and company and then it's gone. It makes it easier for others as well. The advertising is diabolical!! and makes everyone feel inadequate. When you have depression that's the last thing you want . xxxxxx

emms profile image
emms

Thanks for all the replies. I am glad I am not alone. Although that sounds selfish I know. I even hated xmas before my boyfriend died. But now its even worse. He died on 23rd Dec, and everything about it makes me feel much worse

Optimistic9 profile image
Optimistic9

So sorry to hear about your boyfriend. This will be my first christmas since my mum died and I really miss her so much. I keep seeing christmas cards with mum on. Take care

redroseart profile image
redroseart

hi emms bad timeof year specially when you are bereaved. i always feel worse at christmas am glad when its allover . it is all about money and when you have none it makes me feel guilty. i cant afford to buy my grandchildren decent presents but they get all my love. christmas is only for one day its the rest of the year that counts, i will do anything for my children and grandchildren.

I am divorced, have a 22 yr old son who lives at other side of town from me. We will go to my parents for xmas dinner. This year my paralysed brother will be joining us as his wife & kids left him 2 months ago.

I am dreading it so much. I have not even bought a present nor do I have the motivation to go out & do so. So for me I will just be sticking what I can afford in xmas cards with absolutely no thought put into it at all.

I hate Christmas, I find it a very long day putting on a false face pretending all is well with the world.

Bless you all. I hope you manage to get through it as best you can.

Jackie

Robb1722 profile image
Robb1722

Hi Emms, I feel for you, I too lost a very dear friend, losing someone you love is hard enough, but when it will be forever associated with what is supposed to be a happy and joyus time of year it must seem unbearable. Have you tried to use his memory for doing good, Work a local soup kitchen on the day he died, in his honour, so when he watches over you, he will see you smile as you hand out food for the people suffering in different but no less difficult way, we all have our stories.

This could be a way of you bringing the the life back to your life, don't give up, we're all here for each other.

If we, yes all of us who have found a loving, honest and caring community on this website surely we can rebuild our local communities and bring a sense of caring back to this very messed up world we live in. I've actually found more humans on this site who really understand the meaning of the word 'Humanity'.

Take care and may you all find a way to smile each day.

Rob B.

alfie19 profile image
alfie19

Emms

Think positive why don't you make or buy something for your boyfriend that you could take to bed with you and cuddle up to as that may ease the pain.

I am sure your boyfriend would not want to feel this saddness he wants you to be happy and think of the good memories you had together.

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